Article on why habits get worse before successfully breaking them

This was really helpful. Explained a lot of what I'm going through right now. Thanks for sharing!

 

.. well the first point about learned helplessness is really more environmental availability over time I think. If those of us who have read remember, the experiments involved caged animals getting to a point where they no longer try to get out even when the door is open. I can't remember if Seligman did the experiments or just wrote about it but that's not the same as resistance, the animals just started assuming there is no possibility even though they can see the door is now physically open.

Instead of framing it as strong/weak, good/bad, I prefer a big picture view of environmental and situational engineering. If people don't look at the big picture they will never see how the particular behaviors they seek to change is embedded in a context where other less obvious factors support their perpetuation. Things like sleep and stressful life situations that are not directly related to PMO or even sexuality will never be recognized with that tunnel vision.

The it gets worse before becoming better dynamic is not new, but it is only in a literally one dimensional view that pushing through makes sense. Yes at certain points we do want to just do that, but by and large there is no attention to the big picture of the context it sets in even when people obviously have the attention span and cognitive capacity to look at things that way in other areas like their work life/task.

 

I agree getting rid of "it" is more complicated than a simple theory.
I agree that the entire system needs to be reworked. In my case I must find a way to respond to emotional distress differently than fapping, etc. And I must continue building healthy habits.

But the gets worse before better dynamic is spot on to my current situation. And one I read a lot about in various journals and in the failures in the challenges. It is a thing to be dealt with.

Sometimes simple theory or simple models are just what is needed.

I'm in the midst of an extinction burst. That is normal. It is actually a good sign. Push through and I'll see new improvement. Its not tunnel vision. Its focus. And it is exactly what I need to focus on at the moment.