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My expectations were wrong

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by JensDK42, Mar 12, 2015.

  1. Mar 12, 2015 #1
    JensDK42

    JensDK42 Guest

    I wanted to be a saint. I wanted to always think of everyone else. I had no selfrespect.
    It made me sad. Cause I'm the only one who'll look out for me, and I felt let down by everyone else. And then I talked it out with my father. He made the sentence "Put on your own oxygen mask first" make sense.

    If I want to help others, I must take care of myself. People will rather be helped by someone who takes care of themself.

    So I now have selfrespect, and it's much nicer. It's not: what can I do to make others happy? It's: what can I do to make me happy?
    I ended my shower this morning with cold water. And I laughed. I had to stop and wonder. I laughed over something so simple. I just felt, and still feel wonderful.
    Enjoy life free of worries, it's like you're a child again.
     
    JensDK42, Mar 12, 2015
    JensDK42, Mar 12, 2015
    #1
    thedaring9 likes this.
  2. Mar 13, 2015 #2
    Obi-Wan KeNoFap

    Obi-Wan KeNoFap Guest

    I've found that when I work on bettering myself, that this has more of a positive impact on others than when I put my energies working on other people. Now I'm not saying to not help other people, but rather to not underestimate the help you give someone when you fix your own problems. Lots of us have been inspired by other people who have overcome their own obstacles and conqurred their own demons.

    Keep up the good fight, Naikolai!
     
    Obi-Wan KeNoFap, Mar 13, 2015
    Obi-Wan KeNoFap, Mar 13, 2015
    #2
  3. Mar 14, 2015 #3
    universesu

    universesu Fapstronaut

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    Take good care of ourselves is a way to help others more. Your father is insightful
     
    universesu, Mar 14, 2015
    universesu, Mar 14, 2015
    #3
    Chefb87 likes this.
  4. Mar 15, 2015 #4
    ekoluomu

    ekoluomu Fapstronaut
    NoFap Defender

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    Spot on. This is something everyone should know. Being a people pleaser will backfire, so let's take care of ourselves first.
     
    ekoluomu, Mar 15, 2015
    ekoluomu, Mar 15, 2015
    #4
    Chefb87 likes this.
  5. Apr 2, 2015 #5
    Chefb87

    Chefb87 Fapstronaut

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    I loved your post. One thing a reaally desire in life is to find that one woman, fall in love, get married, and be the best husband and father I can be. I feel like I need that in my life eventually. I've also realized that there is no way I would be able to be a loving husband, and a loving father if I'm still doing the same ol thing (PMO). I must learn to take care of myself and discipline myself FIRST before I can be everything I want to be. Your post made me smile. Thanks :)
     
    Chefb87, Apr 2, 2015
    Chefb87, Apr 2, 2015
    #5
  6. Apr 2, 2015 #6
    NeedAChange

    NeedAChange Fapstronaut

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    Fantastic post, Naikolai.
    Really struck a cord with me. I try hard to make others feel ok yet I don't feel ok myself. Self respect/esteem so important.

    Your father is a wise man, and I hope you don't mind if I can take his words to you and use them myself.
     
    NeedAChange, Apr 2, 2015
    NeedAChange, Apr 2, 2015
    #6
  7. Apr 2, 2015 #7
    Limeaid

    Limeaid Guest

    When your cup is full it spills over onto others! Great lesson for sure.
     
    Limeaid, Apr 2, 2015
    Limeaid, Apr 2, 2015
    #7
    Kurapika, Obi-Wan KeNoFap and JensDK42 like this.
  8. Apr 3, 2015 #8
    JensDK42

    JensDK42 Guest

    I'm glad you guys could use it.
    I'm now at 31 days aka 1 month! :D
     
    JensDK42, Apr 3, 2015
    JensDK42, Apr 3, 2015
    #8
    Kurapika and Limeaid like this.
  9. Apr 3, 2015 #9
    Aldrich8100

    Aldrich8100 Fapstronaut

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    I agreed what is said above!
    Certain two facts on this post unequivocally the best we have all had. Lots of us have been inspired by other people who have overcome their own obstacles and conqurred their own demons.
     
    Last edited: Apr 25, 2015
    Aldrich8100, Apr 3, 2015
    Aldrich8100, Apr 3, 2015
    #9

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