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Is it an issue that porn is responsible for starting my desire for a girlfriend

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Fractured Mindset, Jul 11, 2019.

  1. Jul 11, 2019 #1
    Fractured Mindset

    Fractured Mindset Fapstronaut
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    While I am going to have some difficulty explaining how 15 year old me thought about relationships, and how 22 year old me has changed since then, I just want to ask, If middle school (pre porn) me had no romantic intentions, and porn addict (high school until recently) me has craved a woman since discovering the joys of orgasm. Even through loss of pleasure and escalation I've still wanted one. But since this desire was created by my porn viewing, is there anything I need to fix or has it been so long it's not relevant anymore?
    Also, suffering my first rejection earlier this year has made me more tolerant of being alone, though I still often think of having a girlfriend.
     
    Fractured Mindset, Jul 11, 2019
    Fractured Mindset, Jul 11, 2019
    #1
    tommatheus likes this.
  2. Jul 14, 2019 #2
    tommatheus

    tommatheus Fapstronaut

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    A desire for companionship is most natural reward we have as humans, we are biogically wired to seek out a mate, it’s our highest priority...

    PMO is not natural and doesn’t realistically demonstrate what a real relationship with a partner would be... I would say that if you have a desire for a girlfriend, then it has noting to do with watching porn, it means you are actually starting to become more mature and your seeking an experience which PMO has so far not provided to you...

    You said you experienced a rejection, I too had that experience during New Year’s Eve, but I’m happy I actually tried and lost, because at the time I was on a 12 day streak and after being rejected I didn’t feel bad at all, I felt great, because that particular streak made me feel so confident that night, I was high on life and felt like I could talk to anyone, including the hottest property that walked in the door that night...

    My advice; organise a night out with your friends in the next few weeks, pick a venue which is more causal and were it’s easy to chat with women, then build up a big reboot streak, say anywhere from 7-14 days, keep motivated to not relapse because you want to save all your vital energy for that evening. Then go out with your friends and try to meet a group of girls that you and your friends can chat to and get to know... Remember don’t get bogged down with trying to nail anyone, this experiment is just to see how much easier it is to chat to girls when you’ve got all that sexual energy saved up in your body... This will honestly make you realise the damage to our body’s that porn does... It completely destroys all our ability to be successfully seeking out mates, and if our main motivation in life is stripped of us then how can we expect to function properly; Good luck my friend
     
    tommatheus, Jul 14, 2019
    tommatheus, Jul 14, 2019
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    torimodosu likes this.
  3. Jul 14, 2019 #3
    Fractured Mindset

    Fractured Mindset Fapstronaut
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    I can honestly say while I still think about having a girlfriend, my rejection in the long term has set me free from the burden of not having a girlfriend. I did have two minor relapses sometime after the event (I started my current no porn run because of her), but I've kept off since February. I've been off masturbation for almost sixty days now. I have noticed energy changes, but I'm starting to be more tired more often because of work fatigue (or simply put I'm finally getting more hours again). As for my counter, I did have some psub/reset issues shortly after stopping masturbation but that's fixed for now.
    At the end of August I'll be starting my run at a University and I'm moving out on my own for the first time- so I at least will get some new opportunities.

    Though I've had a desire for a girlfriend since porn started, but never made any attempt until recently.
     
    Fractured Mindset, Jul 14, 2019
    Fractured Mindset, Jul 14, 2019
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    Sir Minato and tommatheus like this.
  4. Jul 18, 2019 #4
    tommatheus

    tommatheus Fapstronaut

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    Good luck my friend, it’s great to hear your going to university and going to live on your own!

    Your going to have an amazing time, I know I did when I was your age, and even better you’ll be going through the experience with an understanding of NoFap, and on a massive streak, that’s one thing I really envy, being able to go back and reset, then experience university PMO free... I wasn’t totally addicted back then, but being PMO will definitely give you a huge advantage over other people...

    Have fun...!
     
    tommatheus, Jul 18, 2019
    tommatheus, Jul 18, 2019
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    Sir Minato likes this.

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