A List of helpful tools to get over withdrawal sympstoms and how to overcome urges

So right now I have heavy porn urges. My cravings are insane and I wanna use this opportunity to remind myself and you what is going on.
I tell you cravings are fucking annoying. I don´t need to tell you because you know.
But before you get in a hopeless conversation whether to fall back or not and then be stuck in your head and finally find yourself in a position of relapse, Listen closely.

I tell you motivation won´t make the difference here. At least not in my opinion because through Delta Fos B your Cravings will be hard and your Prefrontal Cortex weakened.
But we need to be remembered what is happening.
There is a part of your brain that thinks porn is great. Not just because it shoots your dopamin through the roof but because it just don´t understand what porn is. Your reward center thinks that you are fucking all this women. And by any biological means that´s a great thing. So it wants you to do it again and again. Then Delta Fos B comes into play but I will write another comment on this topic.

What I have found helpful (mostly in calming down and strenghtening willpower) is to do some breath exercises. Because when you turn into "relapse or not-mode" you will start to breath really flat. But we need some volume in there. So take deep breaths! Breathe in and wait (short) then out times two. I would recommend to do it this way but really do what works best for you. For example breath in for 3 sec, out for 6 sec or in for 4 sec and out for 8 sec. You got the idea. I like that pattern but do what works for you. You need to calm down and try to use as much willpower as possible because some days you won´t have anything to do. Or in my case sometimes things didn´t work out the way we want to and then we need to deal with it. So be ready!

Actually I am really angry right now. This often happens when I get strong urges. Nothing worked out like I wanted. I even needed to change the Pc to write this post because my Laptop fucked me up. I tell you I am close to relapse and with every word I type in I feel heavyness and a sense that the next moment may be the last on this streak. But goddamit I play on risk! I need to write this down!

Okay. There is a part of your brain that things that this is the goddamn evolutionary jackpot but it really isn´t. Masturbating in your room isn´t the damn jackpot. You could have more in life. And really if you calmed down even just 1% ask yourself this. Do you want to wake up tomorrow and know that you need to start over again? Another damn time. Do you really want that? No you don´t!
Short term pleasure is SHIT! It will destory you from within and take your happyness. It will just leave the right amount of energy left so you can do it again.
Stop handle your life as if it is a piece of shit. If you feel this way then hello I have great news. You made it that way! But there are good news too. Only you can change it! At any moment. Don´t buy into that "I will do when the right moment comes" shit. I know you heard it before but it is clichee and true.

If this whole thing didn´t change your mind what´s with this? Do you really wanna fuck yourself up for a brain part in you that is outplayed by porn? By relapsing you basically give that part of your brain the full control, a part that doesn´t even understand that porn is porn.

At first cravings will be brutal. I know it I am experiencing it right now. But trust me porn cravings (or as I mentioned them before "porn urges") will pass. Eventually they will vanish.
And then... yeah then you will see clearly that it was worth going all the way.

Wish you a great day guys!

 

Thanks for sharing!

 

A different view on pain and tragedy in life.

Hello fellows,
I just want to through some thoughts into this thread. Maybe I will go more into depth later.

We always seem to feel a need to numb our pain. But why is this so? I mean just look at antidepressants. How many people take those on a regular basis just to not get insane? How many people use things like porn to numb themselves? It seems like we got a generation full of people who fear to encounter our emotions. We wanna feel good but never bad. We wanna fly high but never low.
I thought about it. I guess this is in itself a hurting thinking circle indeed.
Without high there is no low by the very meaning of the definition. Because without something low nothing can ever be high. You always need something to compare.

SO lets take a look on life.

It is like in taoism. There is good in the bad and bad in the good. Remember a situation which never changed? Yeah I can´t too.

So basically you could try to lower down your lows but this way you also lower down your highs. So you basically try to hit the 0 line. But at the 0 line nothing happens. Never. Period.

Some maybe would say you hit the 0 line if you die (depends on what you believe). I can tell you that you never fully hit the 0 line as long as you are alive. But some people get really close.

They stop trying things out. You heard the quote: "Living the same year over and over again and call it a life"? Yeah that´s basically what they are doing. Lower expectations, lower standards, lower everything. Nothing will hurt them and nothing will make them happy. (Don´t forget that life is an adventure and it can always throw something in your life. Maybe somebody dies or you win at the lottery. You never know.)

Still some people try to lower everything and they start numbing themselves. Let´s say sb important to them died. They would try to medicate themselves rather than feeling the emotions. They will suffer too. No matter what. But they will try to avoid which makes suffering only greater.

You see you can´t really avoid life´s adventures. So why don´t appreciate them?

Why do we find a good TV show interesting? Because there are adventures. I bet you wouldn´t watch some series where there is one tragedy and after 2 episodes is everything great and the next 500 episodes also show the same "everything is good attitude". You would find it lame and uninteresting. But so is life. Life would suck without new adventures. Human being wanna have adventures because through them we can grow and learn. I don´t just mean the bad, the good one´s equally.

Actually I guess I would watch this "everything good series". Let´s say there is a relationship in the show. One day I would zap off and go out there to find the dream woman by myself. Because always watching is boring. You wanna go out there. You wanna live.

Why don´t create a life that has high high´s even if that means that sometimes you encounter low low´s? I guess this is a good definition of living life by the fullest. Stop numbing yourself. Pain is not the enemy!
I mean you can´t stop the high/low circle because it is the nature of life. So why don´t live this principle to the fullest?

Live an extraordinary life!

Wish you a great day guys!

 

Just a tip.
Yeah I relapsed and I will go on but I want to share one tip.
I personally don´t relapse directly. Before I relapse I often google some key words of the things that trigger me.
Never ever do that!
It isn´t impossible to stop from here but nearly impossible.
YOu know thsi adrenalin rush you get when your neuropathways light up? Yeah that´s it.
Never ever allow yourself to do that because it will cause you to relapse.

 

A further reflection on how to see pain in Nofap.

I thought about pain in Nofap and I came to a conclusion.

Your urges basically want you to pmo again. Because a part of your brain things that it is a good thing. But you could also say that you get urges to suffer.

What? Why should I get urges to suffer?

You will feel shitty after a relapse. You feel like you wasted all your time until today. You want to achieve that mindset that you dont need to look at your counter. You just set it as a lifestyle. And you will start doing the things you love.
So when you get porn urges/ cravings you basically get cravings to feel like shit because that is what will immediately follow after your relapse.
Therefore you have to choose your pain.
I am honest. You will suffer. You will feel pain. Maybe your withdrawals are less intensive than withdrawal from other people but you will suffer.
The question is do you want to suffer the pain of not giving in, of retaining your streak, or do you want to suffer the pain of your relapse?

I will repeat it because it is very important. You will suffer ( At least in the first stage of Nofap). Don´t talk yourself out of it.
The question is do you want to retain your streak and over time the pain will fade away and you will start to be happy on a daily basis or do you suffer the pain of regret and relapse.

Choose wisely. And remember if you suffer the pain of regret and relapse you need to start over again and not just that but as long as you choose to suffer this way you won´t ever be able to break free from this circle. Because it will repeat itself. It is a damn circle. So you either choose to put your energy into running in this circle or you choose to put it into breaking out of it.

Wish you a great day guys!

 

Does your urge really go away this fast? Idk my urges sometimes last for an hour or so. But still a good tip.

 

Thanks for sharing! Wish you a great day!

 

HMM sounds like a good idea. Thanks for the explanation!

 

Lol water is essential. I think it is not dangerous. I mean you would just go to the toilet more frequently. It is like vitamin C. You don´t really take too much. It is water soluble so it makes no problem.

 

Nobody ever said drink 7 liter per day lol. I guess 2-4 are good to go.

 

Yeah true. But the idea behind the thread is that anybody who wants can come here and go thorugh a big list and pic some things out they want to try.

This is so damn true. I truly know what you mean. If you find something you want to do with your life it helps so much. But actually I am at home (holidays) and today not much to do. Actually I faced some deep pain.