Afraid of deleting my porn collection

You know how I asked my wife out?
We were friends for about a year and I was madly in love with her, but I was afraid she'd "friendzone" me, or even worse - won't want to see me anymore. but I knew that I just have to do it, she wasn't just any pretty girl that's nice to me, I was really and deeply in love, and I know it has to be done, I MUST ask her out, or I'll be sorry for it for my entire life.
but boy, was I shy and scared...

so what did I do?
I wrote her on MSN asking her out, without sending it.
I left the room, ate supper, leaving the screen on, telling myself that the minute I enter my room I will not think about anything, just hit the enter key, and then it will be too late to think it over, to analyze it, to rationalize why I should or shouldn't do it, just hit the enter key, and oops... too late to look back now. and what do you know? she said yes, and 13 years later, we're still together...

So, my advice to you, is the same. just get it ready, don't think about it, do something else, totally forget about the computer, and then after like 30 minutes or so BOOM, press that enter key, make it too late to go back, just tell yourself "what the fuck have I done?!" right after it, but a minute later you will feel so much better, relief.

 

Deleting your cache is admitting that you wasted some, maybe a lot, of the precious time we have in life on collecting porn. It is admitting this was a bad or useless endeavor. It is also a deeper commitment to reforming your life. So naturally you are going to not want to do it. But doing this will really help you to do what you know is best for you, which is to stop PMO.

Maybe it would help to reframe these videos. Imagine (if it isn’t too triggering) you are some creepy guy in a room videoing two strangers having sex so you can go masturbate to that later. That is after all exactly what these videos are. And when you look at it like that why in the world would you want any part of that? Would that make you proud of yourself?

 

Hanging on to porn is just another way of not lettting go of the habit

 

Deleting porn collection is part of the process. When you are addicted to drugs ,you cannot store it at home.
Porn movies are not part of your life anymore, right ?

 

I know how you feel, I have deleted my collection only to later feel the desire to PMO and waste time in downloading them again. Then after I climax I feel ashamed and delete the videos again. The cycle of wanting to keep something as a comfort blanket and something to look forward to followed by disgust and futility has only prolonged suffering and resentment in my real world life. I am trying to 'replace' the PMO behaviour with something better and meaningful but it's a very tricky and challenging process as I struggle to maintain motivation. Deleting porn is the right step it's just building on that step that takes time.

 

Set yourself free. Make a clean break by severing this last string that is wanting to pull you back into the pit.

 

Trash them now. There is no choice.

 

Have you tried deleting the videos a few (or one) at a time? That would allow you to ease into it and maybe make it easier to delete all of them.

 

If you take this serious, delete them all, forever.

 

Even though the relationship with your favorite porn is all fantasy, the emotional attachment you've created is real. Now you're a man still in love with his ex. I still remember my favorite actors. You have to remind yourself why you broke up. Remember what she (porn addiction) did to you. If you ever go back she'll hurt you again and worse than before.

 

Well done, a brave step. And no, she isn't real, she is designed. In the movie Bladerunner 2049 there is this relationship between a replicant and a hologram. Quite depressing so keep it really real! You are real!

 

I have this collection of over 15.000 photographs, downloaded one by one in the last 15 years.

They are still on my external harddrive. I should delete them.
I know it's necessary and I want to do it at some point, but I just can't do it yet...

 

She was just an image of tiny pixels on a screen that somehow took up a large part of your mind for a huge amount of time. It's very easy to go back to her. The moment you feel the temptation, try to be aware that you have a choice and that doing the same things in the past won't make you grow or experience new things in the real world that could bring you potential happiness.

 

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a friend of mine once dated a known porn actress, that was weird, but they lasted less than 2 weeks together

 

I have a small porn collection I can’t seem to delete, but to be honest I rarely ever use it. I once had a HUGE one and I did delete it. Hard to do but once it was over you realize what a small deal it is

 

Every step forward is one towards freedom.

Some might be more difficult than others but each one has it rewards.

One thing for sure, the long term benefits out weight any short term pleasures.

SS