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I’m 24 year old virgin should I hire and escort or go try to meet a girl

Discussion in 'Compulsive Sexual Behavior' started by Xtownsend, Aug 25, 2019.

  1. Xtownsend

    Xtownsend Fapstronaut

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    so I’m 24yr old virgin I been on nofap for the last 4yrs I’m currently at 97 days of no PMO.This is my situation when I was 20 I could have lost my virginity to this girl I was talking to at work but I could never get it up on multiple times so I realize I have a problem with porn masterbation. I don’t want to have sex with a girl at my job because I don’t know if I’ll be able to get it up. I probably could of lost my virginity long time ago but it seems the only time I get hit on is when I’m at some job and I don’t approach enough or get out enough. So I’m debating about hiring and escort to see if I could have sex and cum or should I just get out there and try harder to find a girl outside of work or a girlfriend ?and I never had one either but I been on dates though.
     
  2. Fightyourlowerself

    Fightyourlowerself Fapstronaut

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    This (the escorts) is a very bad idea - have a look at the posts from people who have done this. They all regret it.

    Why the urgency?
     
  3. Xtownsend

    Xtownsend Fapstronaut

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    I’m getting older I’ll be 25 this year never had a girlfriend and still virgin don’t want to be a 30 year old virgin and still never been in a relationship or have any experience
     
    nirav2696 likes this.
  4. phwrancesco

    phwrancesco Fapstronaut

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    You should do both. Get rid of that damn virginity soon or it will become a real problem.
     
    ADN85 and Deleted-Account like this.
  5. DarkShanks

    DarkShanks Fapstronaut

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    Hire a motherfucking escort OP, but use condoms, don't give her oral, don't get oral from her without a condom, don't kiss her in the mouth. Protect yourself.

    The people that regretted it, it's because they did something that went against their core belief system pushed by their immense primordial desire of pussy and now that they have shot the load the reason comes back to their minds and they feel regret.

    I feel your case is different, you just want to be sure everything down there works properly, you're not paying an escort because you can't find another girl willing to have sex with you without money being involved.

    So, do it OP and update us.
     
    Deleted-Account and FX-05 like this.
  6. 3nigma

    3nigma Fapstronaut

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    Being a guy who fucks prostitutes (a John) is worse than being a virgin. It's gonna take more work, and more perseverance, but in time finding someone you love is going to be more rewarding. Seriously, you don't want this on your conscience.
     
  7. Dizzy Lotus

    Dizzy Lotus Fapstronaut

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    Are you being sarcastic? If you are, it's not clear. If you are... [​IMG]

    @Xtownsend Hooray! If you find a person to marry, you won't have lost your virginity to someone else! [​IMG]
     
    Happycamper12076 likes this.
  8. Fightyourlowerself

    Fightyourlowerself Fapstronaut

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    I understand the pressure but it's not a big deal.

    I would personally advise you to ignore the comments that say do it.

    Have a look at this similar thread and there's many more like it.
    https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/should-i-go-see-a-escort.247230/#post-2208248

    It will be worth the wait when your in a legitimate relationship. Don't do this to yourself.
     
  9. happy08

    happy08 Fapstronaut

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    Embrace it! You still have something special to look forward to. When you find a girl, I’m sure she’s going to think it’s exciting to take your virginity.

    Do you want to look back on your life later and say you hired a girl to take your virginity? :/ Go out on the internet or irl and find yourself a nice girl and don’t try too hard. Eventually it will happen.
     
  10. SolaireofAstora

    SolaireofAstora Fapstronaut

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    besides STDs, ill never understand why people in this forum feel PANIC about escorts.
    They are human beings like we are. IMO people fantasize sex way too much.
    Fantasizing about something is the right way to be disappointed and frustrated. Virginity is not something special, for fucks sake, we are not XIX century damsels, we are men. Jesus, really.
    Besides, there is nothing preventing him to experience divine true love later in his life.

    Do not forget that virgin people who idealize sex too much tend to put women in a pedestal, treating them like a divinity, thus acting in the least attractive way possible to the opposite sex. Remember those movies or sitcoms about virgins with low self esteem? well, thats not very attractive , is it?
    After this experience, in case OP has this problem, he will realize women are the same as us, made of flesh and bone, with qualities and flaws.

    go for it, but cautiously optimistic, you are only going to sate a carnal need, nothing very special about it.
    Be polite, be gentle, treat her well, be human. Escorts generally have a tough life. Protect yourself against DST, cherry pick one in a safe place, one that you find gorgeous, and enjoy.
    Be careful about getting addicted to it, balance is everything in life, as you finances are important too.
     
    Last edited: Aug 26, 2019
  11. Themadfapper

    Themadfapper Fapstronaut

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    What exactly does "losing your virginity" or "getting your cherry popped" accomplish? I thought it was girls who had virginity, not guys? I guess on the plus side you will be wondering what all the fuss what about, and what to do with your life know that you realize that sex isn't all that.
     
    nirav2696 and 420 mile high like this.
  12. 3nigma

    3nigma Fapstronaut

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    You’re going to find a lot of guys that laugh and shrug if you lose your virginity to a prostitute. You wont be so lucky with your next girlfriend.
     
  13. Don't hire an escort! Try online dating for a free hookup or whatever. unattractive chicks are everywhere on it and are desperate
     
  14. realmineralsalt

    realmineralsalt Fapstronaut

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    Yeah, I agree with other responders that virginity is not a big deal at all after you've "lost" it. I was a virgin up until I turned 28, and all that time I was PMO'ing very frequently. I idealized women and put them on pedestals and thought in the back of my mind that having sex with one of them was this huge privilege because they would normally not want it. Oh, how wrong I was.

    I recommend to go look for a girl who wants to have sex with you because she likes you, not an escort. You don't sound like you're desperate to lose your virginity. And besides, when you KNOW the girl wants you, that's the best feeling IMHO.
     
  15. Astro77

    Astro77 Fapstronaut

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    I would recommend going hard mode on no PMO, power through the incredibly tough flatline phases, block all porn and get new hobbies and check this website for reassurance. You will get morning wood at some point in the journey, and when that happens regularly and you get random boners and feel eroused with high libido you know you will be ready to have sex and get a girlfriend, and you will have a great experience. If you are doubting it you aren't ready.
     
    Deleted Account, nirav2696 and Sinbad like this.
  16. Dizzy Lotus

    Dizzy Lotus Fapstronaut

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    I don't agree with your post, of course, but I love this part: [​IMG]
    I guess he should remember to change his clocks [​IMG]
     
    Ghost in the Shell likes this.
  17. SolaireofAstora

    SolaireofAstora Fapstronaut

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    LOL, i hate that english is my second language. :emoji_sob:
     
    need4realchg likes this.
  18. I have to make this exact choice tonight so I’m writing it for both you and me.

    What will I feel before I get an escort? Anxiety. Nervousness. Excitement. Intense dopamine rush.

    What will I feel as I’m doing the deed?
    Anxiety. Nervousness. Excitement. Intense dopamine rush.

    What will I feel after ? Anxiety. Nervousness. Sadness. Sliminess. Anger depending how much I spent. Just want her to leave. Telling myself no more, not again. Regret I didn’t use that money for something more productive.

    Finance:

    No escort:

    100 bucks for 1hr of sex, or 25bucks for a week at the gym? 75 left over to meet a chick at the gym...

    Yes escort:
    Std meds ... pus doctor visit is at least 85$-$145, plus to get tested and blood work is 200$ at a clinic.
    At least $300 , Assuming you only get one of the curable STDs. Only one is not-curable; but you do need to get checked because the others can progressively get worse if unchecked, especially syphillis.

    I have had 50+ escorts, past 2+ years. STDs two tests and the waiting sucks. Fear doesn’t work long term . Better to be informed than scared or working under fear.


    Good you even asked. If you have a dad to ask... you should. What would he say ?
     
  19. needtostop991

    needtostop991 New Fapstronaut

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    It's your life but I don't think you should do it for the following reasons;

    1. You will always be that guy who lost his virginity to an escort. You might have to lie to a future partner about it if she asks you.

    2. Your first time will probably be bad. You need a few times to feel comfortable. It will be embarassing and you need an understanding partner.

    3. Escorts don't care about you. They just want your money. Bad vibes.

    4. Many men have probably been inside her that same day. That's gross.

    5. Instead of being a 25 year old virgin you will be that 25 year old guy who uses prostitutes.

    I lost my virginity a few weeks after turning 30. There were lots of reasons but I am glad I lost it to a girl from a normal social interaction instead of going to see an escort. The first time I got nervous and starting sweating... then after a few minutes I came quickly and couldn't get it up again. I had to try about 10 times before I didn't come quickly.
     
  20. Breach

    Breach Fapstronaut

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    I've had sex once and I paid for it. At an age a bit younger than yours. Unfortunately I'm too tired right now to write a lengthy post about this(edit: this turned out quite long anyway lol), but i strongly advice you my friend, to not do this. It won't feel good. You won't feel proud after. It will be a very dark memory that you won't be able to share with many people, and it'll haunt you. Remember the PMO after which you felt the MOST ashamed. Now imagine this feeling amplified. That is how it will be.

    It's funny I'm reading this today, because I am specially remorseful right now. I was talking to this amazing girl today, not like in a date or anything, but I realised that she is the kind of women I would like to marry. In the future when I marry, I want to be able to be completely honest about everything with my wife. It is eating me from the inside knowing I either have to hide this from my future wife forever, or that I one day, before or during marriage, have to admit to her that I lost my virginity to a whore. Don't do this my friend. It's not even anything special. I'm sure sex feels amazing with a loved one, but thrusting it a few times inside a whore and ejaculating honestly felt no better than PMO. And you are here trying to rid yourself of that. You are not missing out on anything. Today people pretend like sex is what life is all about. It's not. Sex with a partner you deeply care about whom deeply care abouts you is an important part of being human yes, but random meaningless sex is fucking worthless.

    I would do anything to have this part of my life erased forever. I hope I can achieve absolution, both from God and my future wife.

    I've PMO'd to weird shit, I've smoked legal and illegal stuff and drank like a maniac. None of these really makes me ashamed, specially now that I am trying to move away from this lifestyle. There is however two actions in my life that I DEEPLY regret and feel ashamed about and the biggest of those two is by far having had sex with a prostitute.

    I am only a stranger to you, but please listen to my plea, have patience and you shall be rewarded for it. Stay strong. :)
     

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