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Longer term rebooters - PAWS?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by diddykong, Sep 24, 2016.

  1. Oh sorry freedom, you at a talking to skielr. Sry
     
  2. That's alright man!
    We dealing with the same issues. These PAWS post really help people out.
     
    Deleted Account and Skielr like this.
  3. Skielr

    Skielr Fapstronaut

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    Actually I dont remember since when I was addicted(Im 20), but before watching porn(young age) I used to fantasize a lot and jerk off anyway. When I found out about nofap I was PMOing maybe 3 times per week I think. But fantasies and obsessive thoughts about sexuality were ALWAYS with me. I think I didnt even have to actually watch videos to get sexually aroused and to get this fake dopamine shit. But watching them was obviously the most intense part of my addiction. I was anxious and stressful when I did pmo on the regular. I think the only time when I was completely 'normal' was my childhood. The rest of my life was more or less affected by chasing pleasure. And Im only starting to realise that now. This knowledge gives me hope and prevent my brain from fucking me up with overthinking my health issues.
    Couple of weeks ago tension and urges were so strong that I couldnt resist, it was something like it took control over my body and I touched myself frequently. I also went for some Images on the internet, thinking it wont do no harm to me and that Im cured. I did MO twice in the last 1-2 months and I think thats when my body started to give me really strong signals. I cried from helplessness last week just to laugh at it couple of days later and to think how irrational it was.I think I even had panic/anxiety attack at work once.Right now all I really need is someone to keep me aware of the fact that this sympthoms will pass with time, so I dont fall apart again.
    ALSO today I learned that drinking during PAWS episodes is not a good idea. Last night I had some beers with my friend and today my sympthoms were really intense, I wont recommend doing that to anyone. Im also quitting caffeine from this week and meditating daily. Lets just hope I will find my way out of this shit
     
    Last edited: Sep 22, 2019
  4. Skielr

    Skielr Fapstronaut

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    And thanks for asking, its silly but it really helps if someone is actually interested and I can share my issues with him.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  5. Lucky you to find nofap at this age. The earlier the better....
     
  6. Dave G 123

    Dave G 123 Fapstronaut

    Yep - couldn't agree more. I'm only really starting to realise just how badly I've been affected, and I'm in my 40's. If only I'd known what I was dealing with when I was younger, I could have had a much better life. So yeah, the earlier you come to terms with the problem, and follow through and deal with it, the better!
     
  7. I can't watch pretty much any modern tv-serie that change scenes many times per second. Worst are the ones with those annoying flashing transition screens, I can't tolerate them at all. Why can't we have some nice relaxing tv-shows like we used to couple decades back?

    As for the music, I can't listen to most stuff either. I usually just put on some forest ambient sounds to relax myself. It's like my brain can't tolerate any noise.

    Have you tried to get rid of the smartphone and get a dumb phone instead if you're not using it for work related stuff?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 23, 2019
  8. I been off the P for awhile now. I don’t do any social media, my main problem now is fantasies running thru my mind when I lay in the dark. It’s bad if I don’t fall asleep early. Now I’ve just relapsed a few times with MO. Now I’m back in a pretty bad PAWS mode again. All my symptoms came back just as bad. Ears ringing a little louder than normal tho this time. Feel like dying
     
  9. My left ear is ringing from the time to time as well. Trust me, those symptoms will get worse with every relapse until you're a hollow shell of a human incapable of rational thinking or basically anything. I've been through some very hard periods in the past year and they're all linked to PMO which I've done for over 20 years. They all ease after a few weeks of total abstinence so there's hope left for me. Even just fapping once makes the progress go back a lot, so total abstinence is the only way.

    Pray, meditate, walk in nature and keep at it every day, there's no other way out. Suffer through it now and you'll be a better person when Christmas rolls around, maybe not totally healed, but a lot better than now.
     
  10. Yeah. I gotta do the suffering zombie brain fog pretend I’m human thing for awhile again I guess. Sure makes work and life suck ass. I’m just gonna span time until I feel a little normal again. I’ve had a bad weird long year too. This is the first year I found out what and why all this was happening to me. It a relief that it’s not Parkinson’s or MS but at the same time still so scary and a nightmare. All from pmo. And I can’t believe I’m dumb enough to still try and MO. God really did make some of us barely above monkey status
     
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  11. I've had a thorough health check and everything should be good. Through numerous experiments I've come to the conclusion that it's only the PMO that has done all the harm to me throughout all these years. Every time I've relapsed to PMO all the symptoms have come back worse. If you want to think about it in a religious way, porn is made by Satan and Satan never shows his true form as he is the master of lies. He tries to lure you in with every possible way. That's why praying every day is so important. We want to be good and do good things to others. The shame and burden of sin is what keeps us away from being one.
     
  12. I could not agree more. I pray, and I am heard. I see god move in my life everyday. I have come a long way, yet still have a long way to go
     
  13. While this may not sound like much, but I truly feel for your suffering and wish you all the best in your recovery. Know that there are other people like you, so you're not alone with your problems, some don't even know to link these symptoms to PMO. We are the trailblazers of the current phenomena and trust me, there will be many sick people in the future if things continue like this and they seem to do so.
     
  14. Skielr

    Skielr Fapstronaut

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    Yeah its crazy that PMO addiction is still something that nobody cares about.A year ago I would swear that Im not addicted at all, and oh MY God how badly I was wrong...
     
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  15. Skielr

    Skielr Fapstronaut

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    Even fuckin ears ringing... I also had that and had no idea even that could be all about rebooting. I really keep my fingers crossed for you, I think that my sympthoms are pretty heavy, and I cant even imagine how it has to be for someone addicted for a lot longer than in my case. Just remember that there is a light in this darkness,and you have people like us who can somehow
    relate to your situation and keep you going.
     
  16. Skielr

    Skielr Fapstronaut

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    Today I experienced a significant improvement in my dealing with stress.From the moment I stopped freaking out and told myself that all my recent issues are a part of the healing process, Im much more calm and in balance.
     
  17. In the future there will be a lot thread or comments about PAWS. Some people are not really aware of what pmo can do to their brain.
     
    ArduousPath and Deleted Account like this.
  18. Indeed. Especially with the ever increasing over sexualization of society, and people telling people “masturbation is normal and healthy” and don’t even get me started on what teenagers are doing these days. This definitely changes the dynamic of the sex talk we should all be having with our sons
     
  19. I can't even walk to the nearest bus stop without seeing a half naked woman taking her clothes off. Not to mention watching the tv, even during the day there might be triggering content. One has to try really hard to not see sex everywhere. There have been research that the current generation is having less sex than our parents. I think that's why it's so predominant in our society, if people are having less sex, then sex itself sells more in the media
     
    juniormelville and Dave G 123 like this.
  20. Skielr

    Skielr Fapstronaut

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    Everything was going good and I got better and better, but this afternoon during my sleep(didnt sleep much at night and had to take a nap) a wet dream occured. I had no control at all and it just happened like it used to do before. But a while ago some sympthoms hit me pretty hard. Tense body, dizziness, being upset and unable to handle simple conversation,left ear ringing. All the same as before. Tough week ahead of me, I hope to overcome this shit in next few days. I feel like its something that cannot really be stopped,its chemical reaction in your brain and all you can do is accept that and be patient.If its the price im paying for my life Im taking it. Tell me what ya think
     

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