NoFap benefits are for losers: we want superpowers!

I. Chick magnet.
II. Guys suddenly respect you for nothing;
III. Some pretty female cashier smiled at you and you thought she wanted sex;
IV. You walk like you "own" the pavement;
V. Got a promotion at work;
VI. All your ex-girlfriends suddenly want to contact you, to have sex of course;
VII. Ask on the forum if it's a relapse when your girlfriend gives you a handjob;
VIII. Works out and says NoFap is magical while he put a decent amount of effort at the gym;
IX. Rejects girls for the sake of it;
X. Better vision, more concentration, partly true but over-exaggerated.

List any superpowers you saw or read somewhere.

EDIT: Thanks for moving my thread to the main area but I'm not totally serious. Keep that in mind when answering. You should always work on yourself and expect results from hard work.

 

Well, to be sincere, what got me into NoFap was a superpowers post of a guy about 18 years old. Very innocent and exaggerated, I thought it was impossible to me to abstain, I'll never forget that day I read that thread on Reddit. The guy was 18 and managed 90 days, I was like... eh? Is it possible?