How to be successful on a first date with a girl

This is a tough one. I've been very bad at reading situations in the past and reading women's body language/mood etc. I dread dates because they are very difficult and stressful social situations to maneuver. But just be cool, be honest, and communicate. And this means to be honest with yourself - what do you want out of the event? How would you like to see the evening progress? And then pose those ideas to her. Compliments are a good way to let them know you that you have feelings for them. Watch them closely - sometimes they will put themselves into situations where the two of you are alone, or closer together. That's how you know that they might want you to make a move. Eye contact is huge too. But the number one thing is that you must never fear the woman. Do this, and you will stack the odds against yourself. I cannot tell you anything that will guarantee success but you need to keep having these experiences and you will surely get better with time.

 

Don't force the touching if you don't sense they want it. I've done that and it made it awkward. But try whatever you think will work and good luck.

 

Here's a crazy idea: the next 3 or 4 dates you go on be as much of a jerk as you possible can. Like first thing you say to her is, 'Why are you late!!!???' Even if she's on time or early make out she's late. Spend the entire date moaning about how late she was. Remember you're being a jerk. Of course you will probably never get a second date and maybe she'll walk out of the date and that's perfectly fine. This might relax you a bit more. Remember dating is a game so you should treat it like one.

 

I don't have any experience online dating, but I think a first date while transitioning from meeting and talking online to physical interaction should be a bit more reserved. If you think about it, it's truly the first time y'all are meeting. Neither of you know what y'all are truly like, people (particularly men) can easily put on a facade while online dating, so I think the first date should be more about getting to truly know each other. If you don't vibe, or if you seem overtly aggressive romantically it could give her the impression you're just trying to get laid, which is probably not the reason she is on a dating app for. Treat the first date as an opportunity to present yourself to her as who you are as a person in real life and do the same with her. If she's vibing with you, she'll let you know. Also, if you think the date went well, and there wasn't any kind of hug or kiss at the end of the date but thought y'all had a connection, don't despair. Be sure to send her a text later that day/night (at a reasonable time) or the next day and tell her you had a good time and that you hope that y'all can meet up again sometime soon. If she agrees then you know the date went well, if you get ghosted then you know sparks weren't flying.

But again, I have no experience with online dating, it's simply how I would approach a first date if I were to try out online dating. I'm personally much more awkward online than I am in real life. I am much more comfortable with face to face interaction, I'm decent at reading body language and have a much better feel for what the other person is feeling while having an in-person conversation.

 

Your post kind of makes it sound like women find you attractive based on your looks and your text game. You also appear to suggest that your cold approach is weak. You will get better with practice and being a good student. How many cold approaches are you doing a week? Are you number closing from those approaches or are they all from apps? Keep working on your game and things will improve. Don’t despair. You’ll get there.

 

The most important thing you can do to click with women?

Humor.

Be genuinely funny.

I'm not saying do a stand up comedy routine, that isn't going to work and will be forced. Practice your wit a bit, if you can say something hilarious it honestly doesn't matter what you look like … women will be engaged. I'm an ugly pear shaped dude and have never had any issues because I can make people laugh.

You don't have to be creepy, either. Humor will put people at ease in your company and make them think you are fantastic -- which you likely are!

Light humor translates to flirting fairly often. A lot of women also have the habit of touching you when you say something funny and they laugh, which is a good way to gauge how interested they are in you.

Stuffy, stiff or creepy? You goin' get nada.

Humor? They'll think you are hilarious and good company. Laughter = a genuinely good time, regardless of what happens. If they laugh, they will enjoy you and are likely to want your company again.

On the same token, this is a developed skill. Make sure they aren't laughing *AT* you. Don't be stupid for the case of funny.

On another token too... I think laughing women are absolutely gorgeous. The little nose scrunch some of them do when laughing? Damn, man.

Anyway, carry on! Good luck.