She ruined everything or maybe I am over exaggerating

luwezzy2 · Oct 4, 2019

I don't know if I am over exaggerating but just to keep a long story short. I started seeing this girl and we have been good but the problem is she is close friends with her ex's friend(let's call him Tom) and recently we were in a group setting and she kept on sharing meme's with Tom and giving him attention, sharing messages through social media and laughing together bare in mind I was in the room they were busy laughing and sharing comments then she went on to say she will go to Tom's room later on cause they stay in the same complex in front of me that's not even the worst part she went on to ask Tom how her Ex is doing cause Tom is friends with her ex in front of me and we suppose to be in a relationship. So I need advice do you guys think I was over exaggerating the fact that she is talking about her ex in front of me and I just gave her the cold shoulder because I can't believe she disrespected me like that or did she??

Daedaleus · Oct 4, 2019

Have y'all had an explicit talk about y'all being in an exclusive relationship or is it an assumption? If it's an assumption, well... you know how the saying goes. The part that sticks out most to me as a red flag is her saying she's gonna go to another guy's room (assuming she meant just the two of them). I'm all for trust and freedom, but there are certain lines that I would rather not be crossed, myself or otherwise; particularly early on in a relationship.

But I guess the real question would be: has there been an explicit discussion and affirmation of being in a monogamous relationship, or are you operating off the assumption y'all are in one? I've been on both sides of that coin, it can be tricky to navigate.The biggest piece of advice I can give is to try and handle it as calmly and objectively as possible if you want to discuss with her.

luwezzy2 · Oct 4, 2019

Daedaleus said: ↑

Have y'all had an explicit talk about y'all being in an exclusive relationship or is it an assumption? If it's an assumption, well... you know how the saying goes. The part that sticks out most to me as a red flag is her saying she's gonna go to another guy's room (assuming she meant just the two of them). I'm all for trust and freedom, but there are certain lines that I would rather not be crossed, myself or otherwise; particularly early on in a relationship.

But I guess the real question would be: has there been an explicit discussion and affirmation of being in a monogamous relationship, or are you operating off the assumption y'all are in one? I've been on both sides of that coin, it can be tricky to navigate.The biggest piece of advice I can give is to try and handle it as calmly and objectively as possible if you want to discuss with her.
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Yes she is my girlfriend so we have a talk and we are dating and yes I don't know if she was trying to get my attention or what but I am crushed that she said all those stuff in front of me. She tried calling me since I was ignoring her today and I will give her a call later on and hear her side of the story thanks for the advice, I will be calm throughout the confrontation because I really care about the girl. But I still don't trust her cause she has to have my best interest in heart since we are dating. But I will keep you updated.

Deleted Account · Oct 4, 2019

luwezzy2 said: ↑

I don't know if I am over exaggerating but just to keep a long story short. I started seeing this girl and we have been good but the problem is she is close friends with her ex's friend(let's call him Tom) and recently we were in a group setting and she kept on sharing meme's with Tom and giving him attention, sharing messages through social media and laughing together bare in mind I was in the room they were busy laughing and sharing comments then she went on to say she will go to Tom's room later on cause they stay in the same complex in front of me that's not even the worst part she went on to ask Tom how her Ex is doing cause Tom is friends with her ex in front of me and we suppose to be in a relationship. So I need advice do you guys think I was over exaggerating the fact that she is talking about her ex in front of me and I just gave her the cold shoulder because I can't believe she disrespected me like that or did she??
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Personally, im leaning toward you overreacting, but i wasnt there so maybe im missing something

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She ruined everything or maybe I am over exaggerating

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