Will NoFap save my relationship?

That isn’t love, dude. Let her go and take of yourself. True love is not what you have for her if you think about being single and don’t find her sexually attractive. Six years is a long time to string someone along. Not fair to her. Talk to her honestly and leave it up to her. If you are that messed up from porn then you shouldn’t be with anyone anyway—take care of yourself and get this PA in check.

 

I can happen, from my experience, i think you should be away from porn for 90 days first, and then see what happens, chances are yoy are going to have desire for your gf again, porn makes you use a kind of searcher effect for others.

 

I agree with @Juanca12. Obviously she is important to you, and you to her. A deep relationship is about being vulnerable to the other person, especially the deep, dark, and hidden parts. If you do reboot, your love for her will return. You PA brain is just a bit screwed up right now. Believe me when I say that the urge and attraction will return, and come in like a freaking tsunami. The hard part will be to control your urges for her at that point.

If you involve her in your reboot and be honest with your struggles, if she loves you she will stick it out with you, and your love for each other will be in an amazing place on the other side, having a much stronger, deeper bond, with more resiliency.

Yes heartache will occur regardless, you are correct. But it's not the heartache of a broken relationship that you should be worried about. It's about facing what you are trying to avoid by watching porn. Porn addiction is not about the porn, that is only the symptom. Porn addiction (and most addictions) is about trying to numb DEEPLY seated pain and/or trauma that haunt us from the past that has not been resolved, dealt with, and integrated into our self/ego.

No I don't believe leaving her is the right move for you. That won't solve anything. It will only reinforce your tendency to escape difficult emotions, which is at the core of our P addiction.

 

Leaving her before trying is just putting your problems under the bed. Go at least 6 months of rebooting. If you still feel the same then, you might want to move on.

 

I started having open conversations with my gf of 5 years bc I was experiencing what you were (she’s gorgeous but I wouldn’t want to kiss her and stuff too). I was shocked and sick to my stomach bc it was clear my body just wanted porn at that point. That’s when I got real with her and we had a full reboot. Your affection really does come back like a tsunami during a full couple’s reboot lol. No joke...kissing became my favorite thing bc it’s the only sexual contact we were having! Seriously after just a few days of no sex I was fighting urges to give in and have sex. We both were! That’s what made it fun and brought us closer. We started talking about the challenge and bonding through it.

It’s my opinion that if you think you truly love her after 6 years, you probably do so don’t break up. Instead, become closer by opening up to her. Don’t be afraid to tell her you have fantasies about having sex with other girls and that sometimes you think about being single. Myself and tons of other men/women do the exact same thing in long relationships especially at younger ages. It’s in our genes (search the Coolidge Effect). If you’ve been together this long then she is giving you permission to grow with her on a deeper level. Deepen your relationship, don’t end it and start over if you don’t want to.