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Hard to 70 days. Do I reset when I have sex with wife?

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by Determinedhusband38, Oct 14, 2019.

  1. Oct 14, 2019 #1
    Determinedhusband38

    Determinedhusband38 Fapstronaut

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    It's been 70 days since I started hard mode. 74 days since my wife had discovered my activities. Last night, unexpectedly to me, we had sex or made love? To be honest it was fantastic. I think because of the intimacy we have tried to build after all of this. But my question is do I keep the counter going? Is it more of an asterisk type of situation now? My goal has always been no PM but no PMO until we were ready to have sex then the O would disappear. It's now no O unless she is involved.
     
    Determinedhusband38, Oct 14, 2019
    Determinedhusband38, Oct 14, 2019
    #1
    Deleted Account and JamesTheSquirrel like this.
  2. Oct 14, 2019 #2
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Glad to hear that you had good sex with your wife!!
    It really depends on what you are trying to accomplish. My goal is no PMO. O is allowed if having sex with my wife which we do regularly. Been at this for a month and im feeling great. I dont see why guys would want to not O during sex. Seems extreme to me. Keep up the good work.
     
    Deleted Account, Oct 14, 2019
    Deleted Account, Oct 14, 2019
    #2
    vxlccm likes this.
  3. Oct 14, 2019 #3
    Milhouse Van Houten

    Milhouse Van Houten Fapstronaut

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    Married sex is no problem, it's healthy behaviour. PM and O that is related to PM is what we're trying to conquer here.

    But you went without sex with your wife for over 70 days? Yikes!
     
    Milhouse Van Houten, Oct 14, 2019
    Milhouse Van Houten, Oct 14, 2019
    #3
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  4. Oct 15, 2019 #4
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    No, it's fine! 100% healthy soft mode reboot. I do this with my wife, longest streak was 74 days with only sex with my wife for release.

    Only having O with wife, no M or PMO. It's the best way to rewire I think.
     
    Deleted Account, Oct 15, 2019
    Deleted Account, Oct 15, 2019
    #4
    skullbush, vxlccm, Deleted Account and 1 other person like this.
  5. Oct 15, 2019 #5
    budvap

    budvap Fapstronaut

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    So it seems like that's exacly what has happened, right?! Congrats! :)

    As to the counter, you can simply start a new one with 72 days (or how many now) in PM mode, if the counter keeps you motivated. At least this is my own plan if we eventually start having sex with my wife again.
     
    budvap, Oct 15, 2019
    budvap, Oct 15, 2019
    #5
    Deleted Account likes this.
  6. Oct 15, 2019 #6
    Determinedhusband38

    Determinedhusband38 Fapstronaut

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    I was doing more inappropriate things then just porn. Sexting with girls I found on Reddit. So it was needed. I'm lucky in general with my wife now looking back!
     
    Determinedhusband38, Oct 15, 2019
    Determinedhusband38, Oct 15, 2019
    #6
    Deleted Account likes this.
  7. Oct 16, 2019 #7
    kaow84141718

    kaow84141718 Fapstronaut

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    If your wife wants to have sex, you drop everything you are doing, rip her clothes off, and enjoy each other!!! :)

    That is perfectly fine!!! It is the unhealthy behaviors that take us away from our spouse that are the issue. By not engaging in 'PMO' for the sake of your marriage, it will bring you closer to your wife. By engaging in 'PMO' for the sake of self-satisfaction, it will tear your marriage apart. So, I say again since you are not engaging in 'PMO' for the sake of your marriage:

    If you wife wants to have sex, you drop everything you are doing, rip her clothes off, and enjoy each other!!! :)
     
    kaow84141718, Oct 16, 2019
    kaow84141718, Oct 16, 2019
    #7
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