This is the beginning...and its already difficult

Hello,

This is my first attempt at NoFap but it is very long overdue.

I am 28 years old and have had a porn addiction since about 12. I had very little supervision growing up so I was really able to look at anything and had access to porn from a young age. This caused me to be introduced to masturbating even before I went through puberty. Once I was able to successfully ejaculate I didn't stop...ever. When I lost my virginity (age 17) I didn't finish because I was totally desensitized from the feeling of pleasure. Still able to finish myself I carried on this ideology that it was a gift that was a good thing since woman always complained about men orgasmed before them and too early. This seemed to work out finally proceeding into young adult hood. Problems didn't occur until my sex drive started to lower because of now, not having anything to hide from since I didn't live at home, was able to masturbate multiple times a day and watch porn when ever I want. Since I was doing this for so long it started to affect my marriage since I had to either have sex for her sake even if I didn't feel like it so my performance was subpar or she would have to wait for me to be in the mood which happened randomly and usually when we were already in bed or in the middle of the night. I've since got a divorce for unrelated reasons and am now with someone that I care a lot about and would like to try to cure this addiction and actually be to share in the sexual experience of an orgasm with my partner. This is not going to be an easy task for me and even sitting here writing this on day 1 of my experience without porn or masturbating I am finding it ever difficult to keep my mind from slipping into doing so since I am, home alone which is often in my current situation. I need a leg to stand on, I am looking for some suggestions or ideas to gather my footing to start feeling more confident in being able to achieve this. Thank you

 

My goals is to achieve an orgasm with my partner without the need of my own hand. I've long understood I was not able to since of my porn and masturbation addiction.
Why? I do want kids with her (I have one from my previous marriage but had to finish myself and then insert) so I would like to try to avoid that avenue again. Given I am not trying
for children now (prob in a year or so) I have some time to try to achieve it.
A reset would be if I watch porn and masturbate. which is the reason that im in this whole mess in the first place.

Im not sure what PMO means. I am new here and seen the acronym multiple times but haven't figured it out. Personal masturbation orgasm? lol idk.

EDIT: Oh, Its "porn, masturbation, orgasm" got it. lol

 

Yes, I came to that realization and intend to take this as long as possible. Im starting with the goal of a month but wish to continue for life.
I already cleared my computer of porn recommendations and sites I follow so they wont pop up randomly while I am doing normal internet browsing.
I just need some recommendations besides "just dont do it" to keep me from relapsing because I don't wanna go back and I would love to have my first
true real orgasm with a partner.

 

On day 4? the hardest part isnt even the masturbating. its the not watching porn.