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When PM is used to prevent (risky) sexual behavior

Discussion in 'Compulsive Sexual Behavior' started by Deleted Account, Nov 3, 2019.

  1. Nov 3, 2019 #1
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    I was wondering if other people recognize my behavior:

    On the one hand I think sex is healthy and a normal part of human nature and good for your well-being. On the other hand, I have a high sex drive and I used porn and masturbation twice a day to reduce my libido, to limit the time I would think about sex and to prevent me from having (too many) casual sexual encounters.

    Although this approach was somehow effective, it also drained me of the positive effects of high levels (masculine) energy in daily life.

    I deleted the dating apps first and now I see the benefits of no PM (higher energy and motivation), which is really nice. But I also see an increase in distracting thoughts about sex, which actually make me less productive.

    I want to keep the energy and motivation, but focus it towards goals I want to achieve (instead of thinking about sex or looking for casual hook-ups).

    How do you cope with this the best way? Do other people recognize this?
     
    Deleted Account, Nov 3, 2019
    Deleted Account, Nov 3, 2019
    #1
  2. Nov 3, 2019 #2
    VCjonas12

    VCjonas12 Fapstronaut

    25
    17
    3
    Phyiscal exercise and cold showers work for me.
     
    VCjonas12, Nov 3, 2019
    VCjonas12, Nov 3, 2019
    #2
    jollyjim, Deleted Account and Foxhole like this.
  3. Nov 3, 2019 #3
    Davidphd1866

    Davidphd1866 Fapstronaut

    705
    997
    93
    Yucca,

    I can TOTALLY relate. I have often masturbated JUST so I wouldn't go out looking for hookers or massage hookers or......etc.....Masturbation isn't always the worst choice.
     
    Davidphd1866, Nov 3, 2019
    Davidphd1866, Nov 3, 2019
    #3
    Deleted Account likes this.
  4. Nov 4, 2019 #4
    Foxhole

    Foxhole Fapstronaut

    366
    765
    93
    My Journal
    Two points from me:

    1) What you put in your head is what you get from your head.
    2) Tension-relief mataphor is just wrong.

    Too many people live with idea that if you dont have sex or masturbate, the tension inside you just grow and grow until you relief it somehow or you explode. But it's not true. If you don't think about having sex, you won't miss it.
    Do you know the Gruedoes? Little biscuits with chocolate topping? They are the best! I can't be a single day without them. I think i would incredibly suffer without Gruedoes. Do you think you can live without Gruedoes? Of course you can. You never missed them, right? You never missed them, because you never heard about it. And with sex and porn its the same. If your primary setting is "not to fap", or "dont have sex" of course you'll become obsesed with it. Your braind doesn't understand the concept of yes and no. If you thing about not having sex, you think about having sex.

    So what happen if you PMO to "relief the tension"? You feed your brain with more porn images and become even more sex addicted.

    The best way is channel your energy in very different direction - hobbies, charity, work...

    Good luck bro.
     
    Foxhole, Nov 4, 2019
    Foxhole, Nov 4, 2019
    #4
    bmml and Deleted Account like this.

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