35 and Older Accountability Group

DM me for Accountability partner I am 17m btw

 

Checking in, all going well.

Feeling positive.

Keep fighting the good fight all.

 

Chaser got me. That's two in the past 24 hours.
Still no porn though. 28 days no porn.

 

Day 4.

Have bounced back from my slip up ok, still God is shaping and moulding me, it has been a bit of a struggle to get back into prayer with Him. Just before I fell, I felt like I was becoming one with the bedrock who is Christ. Resistance and abstinence in certain contexts is good, very good. It is doing more than we can imagine mentally and physically if we continue to withstand the weights of temptation and sin. God will always send me subtle reminders that life is better with Him so I need to keep going after having dusted myself off 4 days ago. I have been self assessing and asking God how my life with Him looks at the moment, is it good God?, average? or 10 shots over par? After 27 days PMO free, I start to feel good about myself and obedient. Next minute I fall and ask Him how did I go? Do you still love me or despise me? Am I still good? All is not lost, I have to look at it like It's 27 days the enemy or my flesh never owned or got the better of me with.

Sometimes I look at my life and want to complain to God, this is too hard! I have had enough! How dare could I complain or whinge to God after all He has done for me, yet sometimes my mind will go back there, especially after a fall like I had. The enemy be like,
"ahhh typical, just another drop kick move you made idiot, there's no hope for you! How can you expect to maintain this relationship with Jesus? Look, its just not possible, you'll be on your own forever, throw the towel in and come and i'll take care of you..." I won't give in, never.
I have clothes, food a house, a job, money, some friends (not many) and health. My provision is in abundance, I must keep getting lower as He is exalted higher no matter what. Blessed is the homeless man who lives in a cardboard box under a bridge but who knows the love of Jesus and his heart is full. No matter what the enemy or my flesh makes me feel like, I must pursue Him, deny myself and be ever grateful for my life and the circumstances in which I am in, everyday, He is in everything and is always for and never against us.

I shall continue to run this race.

God Bless you all.

 

"if we are faithless,
he remains faithful,
for he cannot disown himself."
2 Timothy 2:13 NIV
The guarantee of His love is that He loves us for how He is, not for how we are!
God bless you and give you the strength to continue, @jcforreal !

 

Gay AP volunteer here:
account name: tigate
App: WhatsApp

 

@discovery sorry you're struggling the last couple of days my friend. Let's get a day under your feet today and start rebuilding! It can be a lonely road. I'm glad we are in this journey together. I'm with you in spirit today.

 

Thank you my man! I'm back to almost a day and a half now. And 29 days without porn, and a 28-1 record. Imma focus on those last two. Happy to see that you're back to 9 days. One more, and back to double digits! Hope all is well with you.

 

Wednesday check in. Good week so far.

 

Thank you for the verse brother! Congratulations on 180 days, that's a great service to the King.

 

Back to zero. I know my trigger, my hook, my Shenpa that got me. I know how stress, work pressure, and putting on the fake fire to get through the day impacted me that night, while working away from home. A perfect storm? It’s identified, now it’s up to me to do something about it ready for the next time. The journey continues!

 

I returned from a trip last night (always guarantees reset), but I spent some of the flight meditating, going through my rationalities one by one, talking myself out of it, and feeling empowered. Working through Mark Queppet's Reforged Man courses and some of the recent videos are speaking to me. I visualized what my evening would be if I gave in and what it would be if I didn't. When I walked in the door, I did what I saw my higher self doing. One week down. Day 8.

 

Thursday check in. I made it to the gym Monday and yesterday after a very long 6 or 7 month pause. I can say my sleep has GREATLY improved, but still sore and tired as hell lol! In a good way though. Have a good day

 

Relapse. Bummer. The only good thing about it is I can rejoin my bud @discovery on the list and we can work our way up together.

 

Am I still in this group? Haven't participated in a long, long while. Need to figure something out because I'm wasting my life away with this fap stuff.

 

Going to try and just make it 2 hours from now.

 

Haha, true. Good to have you around again. Though it would be better up there than down here. No worries bro. Time to focus on the aggregate rather than the streak. But still pushing for the streak of course.

You might want to join the 1 Day Challenge. I have found it helpful after a relapse. Those first 24 hours can be pretty tough to get through. Good to see you again, Freebird.

 

Is there any way in NoFap to have a "private accountability group", i.e. only those officially in the group can post?

 

So, after my relapse a few days ago, I really wanted to make sure that I stayed focused on the total, and not just the streak. I just made up this calendar that starts on Oct. 8, 2019 at specifically 2:15am (last relapse before 27 day streak) and ends on Oct. 8, 2020 at 2:15 am. Next to the days, I have a number next to them, with 1 next to Oct. 9, 2 next to Oct. 10, etc, up to 366 for Oct. 8 of next year (leap year next Feb.). Anytime I slip up, I will make a note of it next to that date, with info about whether it was P, M, or both, and the times, and anything else I might want to add. On every month on the 8, I will write in a monthly total, with the cumulative yearly total right next to it. This will help me stay more accountable for my behavior and give me the credit I've earned for good days, even if I've lost them by breaking a streak. In 10 hours it will be one month. Assuming all stays well, my first monthly total will be 2 Ms and 0 Ps. Not too shabby really considering the norm.