This is why I fap every few days (without porn!)

I've never fapped to porn since Febr 2018 (almost 2 years).

But since last year I developed a special relationship with this woman from work.
She is hot and kind.

But the thing is she is 12 years older than me + she is married!

We were very close to slipping into making a "mistake" but we didn't.

Since then, I see her at work and we chit chat etc.
She gives me the dirty look, bites her lips and looks at my dick in several cases.

She drives me insane and makes me horny, despite not actively trying to seduce me.

To be honest, If I ask her she will 100% come down for sex.

But I don't feel good doing that because she is married + I see her at work.

And you shouldn't do shit at your workplace.

I am not into another woman right now, nor do I have a sex partner.

My "solution": I fap every few days just imagining her, only to get my appetite and keep myself from doing the "mistake".

 

You are right. By fapping at her I am not releasing the tension but instead im fueling my sexual desire towards her.