Male pill / contraceptive

PaulD2000 · Dec 9, 2019

Hi Guys,

Has anybody heard of or does anyone use the male pill? I heard about it last year and I'd be interested in using it. Our sex life is almost non-existent. My wife used the pill for around 10 years but now does not. I've had to start using condoms which I hate, especially after years of natural sex. As a result I've lost my erection several times which is awful for us both, she feels unattractive and I feel inadequate. I don't want the snip and she does not want operations. We haven't fully decided if we are finished having kids yet. We nearly actively avoid having sex in case this happens again and we only do occasionally out of a sense of duty, birthdays, anniversaries etc.

Any advice welcome
Thanks

Paul

JamesTheSquirrel · Dec 9, 2019

I don't think the 'male pill' exists yet. There have been several clinical trials but the last one I read about was cancelled because it was causing depression and suicidal thoughts.

Can I ask what your issue is with condoms? I had problems with them for many years due to a lack of sensitivity, which was primarily caused by death grip M. Now that I've been PMO free for a while I don't have an issue. You can also try buying extra sensitive condoms.

The only other thing to look into would be fertility tracking such as natural cycles. It's less safe than other methods and would require your wife to be onboard but it could be worth thinking about.

PaulD2000 · Dec 9, 2019

Thanks James. I went from having 10 years of bareback sex with my wife to then having to put on a condom. It feels so unnatural and there is very little sensitivity. Sometimes I need to focus hard on the bit of sensitivity I get to make myself cum.
The main issue with condoms is that I loose my hardon when I try to put on the condom or when I tried to enter. It makes my wife feel unattractive, and she thinks its her fault. It makes me feel inadequate and leave us both avoiding sex in case the same thing hapens.

WhoCares101 · Dec 9, 2019

Have you or her looked into a IUD like Mirena? They are really simple little things that get put in and release copper or something to prevent pregnancy. They last about 5 years and can be easily removed by her doctor whenever. Also easy to put in. A lot of women dont know about these or thing there is "more to them". They are really simple. My fiancee had one in when we met and had no issues with having sex without condoms. I also am used to having sex now without a condom and it's weird to try with one. Unsure about the Male pill though, I have heard something was in the works but maybe a few years down the road.

boilerball123 · Dec 10, 2019

I would advocate for the calendar method of family planning also. You don't have the health risks of medicinal treatments, you get to keep going bareback, and when applied properly it is almost as effective as pharmacological contraceptives

PaulD2000 · Dec 10, 2019

Thanks guys, I will definitely look into this. I might bite the bullet and speak to my family doctor as well. I feel a bit embarrassed but I need to improve this

Thanks again

MidnightOwl · Dec 10, 2019

They do a birth control patch now for women. My DIL uses them. Maybe worth an ask

PaulD2000 · Dec 10, 2019

Thanks, I will ask about that too. The reason for her coming off the pill is that its not healthy for long term use. I can't see how it would be considering it stops you having periods. He sister has always refused to take it and links it to longer term health problems for women. The path might have similar risks but I will ask.

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