I failed tonight with PMO. I'm able to resist all day for weeks usually using methods my pastor and plenty of resources have taught me (quote verses like Proverbs 5:3-5 or Philipians 4:8 to not believe lust's lies, pray, think on other things, etc) But when I'm stressed out I KEEP DOING THE SAME PATTERN THAT LEADS TO FAILURE!! And I don't understand why! I get so drained from school and my job I hate and all I want to do is veg out on Youtube. And then after I've been sucked in for a few hours I can't seem to pull myself out. My porn addiction only still lives because of an internet addiction,which is me trying to feel better. The things I watch on Youtube start to cuss and be more risque until.. you know. I know the solution is "change my go-to fix and like pray or something when I get home", but it's hard by definition to care when you're problem is being burnt out beyond caring. I know I sound self-pitying and whiny but I figure if there's anyone who knows this problem it would be you guys. Any tips?
Jesus is always the answer, as trite as that sounds. So, start with him. How can you connect with him in a way that is natural and "easy" for you? What is your "sacred pathway"? https://irp-cdn.multiscreensite.com/2988a589/files/uploaded/sacred-pathways.pdf As a discipline, make your default action in high-stress and low-energy times something that connects you to Christ instead of something that permits you to "veg out." We are not vegetables, after all! Then, with him, find restful activities that bring life instead of destroying it. If YT leads to acting out, then chuck YT and find something else relaxing to do -- read a book, play a game, etc. At the Spirit's direction, I did a YT fast for a month a while ago and it really helped to reset my priorities. YT used to be a source of some stumbling for me, too, at one time. It is not any longer. I mainly watch "This Old House" vids on there now. Very relaxing to watch other people do the hard work of home repair!
Thanks! I'll have to take a look at that quiz! I've tried to replace Youtube before, but I always come back to it. I think the most appealing part of Youtube is it feels like people are talking to me (I'm a really social person and can't really stand to be alone much!) so maybe books will do the same thing and let me better control what I'm putting in!
There's plenty of good stuff on YT. You choose what you watch on there. Start a new habit. Watch "Bible Project" videos or "Inspiring Philosophy" channel or any of the thousands of others helpful things on there. You do not need to wallow in trash to feel as if you are being talked to. And, hey, why not reach out here and other places and actually, you know, connect with real people?
You know that Youtube actually has an algorithm that shows you stuff based on what you've watched before on your account, right? So if you want to be able to change your youtube viewing recommendations and habits, the smartest thing is to log out of your account, or use a new account, if you want to watch youtube, otherwise, it will merely send you down the same spiral/rabbit hole and you'll find yourself in the same place as before. That's a practical measure. Another thing is, I've found myself so much happier reading books rather than watching netflix/youtube since trying to quit that it's making my life better in general. Maybe we need to stop reflexively going to the internet for entertainment. There is a lot out there that just isn't on the internet.
