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Over 100 days PM free! Lessons learned

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by Gandalf the White, Nov 28, 2019.

  1. tsukiyumio

    tsukiyumio Fapstronaut

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  2. Taksen

    Taksen Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the post, much appreciated. I think you’re 100% right about changing habits in other parts of your life as well. The only part I don’t agree with is using dating apps because the feeling of rejection on there for some could cause relapses but at the end of the day, it’s about whatever works for you. Congrats on getting to 30 days and good luck with your journey. Think if I get to 30 days, I’ll be very happy
     
  3. SaFaRi

    SaFaRi Fapstronaut

    you inspired me! Keep going
     
    Gandalf the White likes this.
  4. Asgardian36

    Asgardian36 Fapstronaut

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    hey man, all the points you touched were Valid.....awesome points! Keep it going, man!


    PS: the fifth point clearly isn't for me and I'm sure for most folks here.
     
  5. Hey Siple, missed this reply last week.
    Couldn't have asked for nicer words, thanks.
    Congrats on creating an account an starting your journey.
    You can do this, just get it done one day at a time.

    As you wrote distractions such as school and hobbies are crucial.

    I spent most of the time out of my apartment the first week either at work, with friends or at the gym.

    Still trying to do that as much as possible.

    You got this
     
  6. Thanks, I will do my best, you keep going too:)
     
    SaFaRi likes this.
  7. Thanks for the kind words, hope you are succeeding well.

    How come point 5 is not for you? Interesting to hear
     
    Asgardian36 likes this.
  8. Thanks for reading and the kind words.

    Yeah I think that is one of the most central parts that I've realized more and more over the last 47 days.

    We have to take a step back and attack the root of the problem.
     
  9. Indeed. Once I thought I'd never make it. But anybody can. Just gotta get past the next day, 10 seconds at a time.
     
  10. I totally agree with this part. I would't be able to wean off PMO If I hadn't implemented all of the healthy habits. Remember, healthy habits are like a snowball. If you start one it's much easier to develop the next one and so on.
     
    Espi1971 and Gandalf the White like this.
  11. Agreed! Healthy choices lead to more and more healthy choices
     
  12. Asgardian36

    Asgardian36 Fapstronaut

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    the 5th point : Use some Dating apps...won't fucking work for me because I'm always likely to get disappointed about that, believe me, I have tried many apps, not just tinder, every major app there is about dating....i havent gt any positive response from any of them, because girls have upper hand in those apps, me being an indian doesn't help either...thats not the point. The point is that it will lead me into depression and it will pave way for urges or some stupid justification to fap to Porn. You know the drill......

    so thats why point number 5 doesn't work for me. :)
     
    Gandalf the White likes this.
  13. aniseprakash

    aniseprakash Fapstronaut

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    Motivating and useful bro. I am just starting my reboot. Earlier I was worried that spending lot of time in the community might become an addiction, but posts like yours kicks my worries. Thank you and keep going
     
    Gandalf the White likes this.
  14. Ah I see, sorry to hear that, but makes sense. If you feel that it makes you feel bad then definitely avoid it.

    I agree that girls have the upper hand on Tinder and all similar dating apps.

    Unfortunately, I think in many ways girls have the upper hand in most ways since men are more interested in casual dating/casual sex/more horny.

    Which means that women become the choosers in many ways.

    On the other hand women are the ones that feel unsafe out at night from fear of sexual violence and from aggressive men so I won't pretend that either gender has it all.

    But good job identifying what works and doesn't:)
     
    Espi1971 and Asgardian36 like this.
  15. I think it's possible to get addicted in a way but it feels like a healthy addiction compared to most.

    Getting addicted to reading progress stories and helping others, learning etc. doesn't seem too bad.

    And most likely I will taper off time spent on the forums the longer I advance in my journey.

    But it's always good to be mindful of where healthy habits end and addictions start:)
     
  16. aniseprakash

    aniseprakash Fapstronaut

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    Good to see positive words of yours bro. Thank you
     
    Gandalf the White likes this.
  17. Asgardian36

    Asgardian36 Fapstronaut

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    thanks dude.....i can look back at my life and can figure out what went wrong but I cant seem to make any progress because I dont take action :D
     
    Gandalf the White likes this.
  18. 3ayshleh

    3ayshleh Fapstronaut

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    What do I do in the first days and feel that the subject is difficult and that if it works for all people it will not work for me!
    what i must do ?
     
    Gandalf the White likes this.
  19. 3ayshleh

    3ayshleh Fapstronaut

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    Doing good too but I have insomnia and migraines - they just don’t go away, especially the insomnia - always feel like a zombie and I can’t keep sober if I’m always tired bc I get mad that I’m tired and I use as a stress reliever - i know sinning is not all related to that but i do believe it’s a big part - please pray victory in my life over sleep, migraines, and of course freedom from sin -
     
    Gandalf the White likes this.
  20. Hey,

    Not religious myself so can’t relate to the sin part.

    But it sounds like a good first step is to identify why you have insomnia.

    Are you using electronics late/in bed? Screens tend to wake us up.
    Or are you stressing about anything? Maybe meditation.
    I've very bad at getting enough sleep myself, what works for me is to leave all electronics outside my bedroom about 8-9 hours before I'm getting up.
    Then reading a book or newspaper (printed, nothing electronics) really gets me to not think about a bunch of other things.

    Whatever you do you have to get out of the mindset of using PMO as a stress reliver.
    It's very common.
    It was/is for me as well.
    But it's obviously a vicious cycle.
    Force yourself to be rational, knowing that if you skip PMO, go to bed early, read and relax you will quickly start to feel clearer and more focused.

    I used to stay up till 3-4 am when I had to get up at 6 am, edging to porn.
    Obviously edging for 5 hours and then orgasming, sleeping poorly for 2-3 hours and then getting up made me feel absolutely miserable.
    Couldn't focus, couldn't properly be social.

    So I see where you are coming from.
    But you have to break the cycle one day at a time. Stay busy until you go to bed, read a book and try to sleep. It should come with time.
    If you do all that and you STILL have insomnia you should see a doctor.
    But I would try the above first because nobody sleeps well if they are watching screens, PMO'ing and not going to bed.
     
    slb_123 likes this.

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