Why Do You Feel Ashamed of Watching Porn?

I don't and I don't watch much, but I can say.. It is bad to overdo it. so don't why you gotta aask that? Don't . Just be gentle to yourself.

 

Because you are jerking off to strangers having fake sex in your laptop

 

Really good question. I think it has to do with all the genres I escalated to? Hypno especially. But I don't think that's the full picture. I'll have a think about it.

 

The majority of porn I have watched and been in to over the years I wouldn't necessarily say I ashamed of. But there is one genre I escalated to, femdom, that I am ashamed of and embarrassed by. For instance I would be embarrassed if people who know me knew I was getting off on that.

But the majority of porn I have been in to over the years I wouldn't necessarily say I am ashamed of. But I know that years of constantly jacking off to it has caused me harm, and I know that jacking off constantly to any porn or artificial sexual stimulation is unhealthy.

 

How did you do your progress bar?? I like it.

 

Yeah, I feel ashamed. I do not think it is only about taboo genres. Just watching porn of any kind is shaming to me.

 

Well, my reasons may not be helpful to everyone. It has a lot to do with my Christian religious upbringing and the moral principles I still hold dear. I never had any doubt or confusion that I was doing wrong. To do something that God would not want me to do was bad enough. I also felt very selfish when watching porn. It was as if I wasn't in control of myself. Moral incontinence if you will! That is why I was ashamed of watching porn. It hurt me to upset God by doing this over and over.

 

Yes i feel shame,i m femdom addict so because porn i have watched in past that fantasy can never happen in my reality so from that world i need little time to come back to real world,confused feeling too.

 

One of my friends fetishes and favourite porn is farting porn. So an attractive female farting in a mans face.

I actually found this quite funny.

 

What a great question and I love the open-mindedness everyone has it's inspiring to me and I'll try to do the same and really look at this for myself. I think of myself as a shameaholic, the porn I watched started over the years of active addiction to have more and more to do with shame. I am pretty sure I didn't feel very ashamed at first, as in say my first two experiences with porn. my 3rd exp sb gave me his stash and i know there was some shame bc i hid it, would only watch and masturbate when fam was out of the house etc. as for why i like what was shared about how the kind of porn has an effect some seem more shameful but that that isn't the whole story i kno thats def true in my stiry. That stash wasn't anywhere near as "bad" as what I got into after just a couple years later so it couldn't be just the content. I think I was already feeling like a bad person at a young age before ever learning about or doing anything sexual and that the pm+ was just a very useful explanation in retrospect. My little kid logic was "I'm bad but I don't know why so I can't even start to fix it. Oh it must be this." Helped along by more and more extreme content and internalizing messages especially from peers that pm+ was "dirty" and otherwise shameful. Oh, back that idea of "bad," another part of the shameaholism was that people naturally tend to want what they're told they can't have and that seems to include things we "shouldn't" have. Another pattern related to that was rebelliousness, I often thought "oh you say this is bad and I shouldn't well you can't stop me I'm totally doing it." Now that's funny to me, I see it like someone saying "oh you say touching hot stoves is bad? YOu can't make me not do it!" or "yeah yeah you all say it's bad to walk in front of fast moving traffic but you're not the boss of me" lol. I think I thought I was getting back at a world that called me bad (when I'm pretty sure that idea started in my head long before people told me I was bad, certainly I can say I became its biggest proponent very quickly) by hurting myself. Sometimes literally, I hurt myself masturbating and then did the same thing the next week knowing it would hurt again. That's insanity not badness. Back to porn, I think I also felt bad because it isn't kind. It's the same with all the lust, an extreme example was how I would stare at someone, try to take a mental picture for purposes of masturbating later. There's a sense in which that is trying to take and to invade their privacy, in a mild and roundabout way as far as actual harm but certainly not kind and I wanted to be kind I was just having a lot of trouble actually doing so . I think shame goes pretty close to the core of my addiction, one time I thought the shame itself was the problem and my solution was to just stop feeling shame about pm+ and do it as much as I wanted. It's a long story but the short version is I discovered another reaosn why I feel bad with pm+ is that I was being controlled by it and I don't like the feeling of being controlled.
Speaking of lust I still get shame after years of happily not having to use any form of pm+, and so it's very useful to keep looking at, talking about and practicing a solution for. Sometimes my sexual attraction makes sense why someone would feel bad for other times it's more obviously insane just like my pm+ became more and more clearly insane. Common example is when I'm attracted to someone for non-sexual attractiveness like beauty, friendliness etc and feel bad for it. It tends to be interrelated with thoughts such as "you're married that's not ok to feel that way towards anyone but your spouse, you're probably going to try to set up sex with that person aren't you?" A little overzealous right? . I think it's that same thing of assuming I'm bad and then needing a reason to pin it on.
So there's a lot of subprocesses: fear of acting out, hurt pride that I'm not as good as my ego says I should be, rebelliousness, realizing it can control me, an assumption that I'm guilty just looking for evidence, and of course conditioning and the actual content of the porn itself, among other things. Thanks everybody for sharing your experiences it's really helped me continue to look at a really useful and insightful topic of discusssion.

 

Because you're doing something you hide from everyone but yourself. You do it when your rommate is around but too far to hear you fapping. You do it when your parents are sleeping.

 

we do it when we think the coast is clear. after we do it, we sometimes assume some people heard us but choose not to tell us

 

the shame comes after i do it because its what i really really wanted but its like a taboo to do it in frnt of ppl

 

same here, man. when they make fun of us or taunt us, we think they know somwething about our addiction