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I like her but should I date her?

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by NF SINCE BIRTH, Jan 10, 2020.

  1. She has schizophrenia. We have nice chemistry but I feel like something is off about her. She is easily startled by seemingly small things and sometimes she shuts the world out and goes into her own bubble. She is a cute girl and all. Really pretty. Funny and social most of the time. She is sending mixed signals. I am not sure if she knows how to flirt.
     
  2. Kligor

    Kligor Fapstronaut

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    Hi buddy,if you like her then date her i mean you can't lose anything.You say she is schizophrenia so give yourself more time to know her better,anyway that is your decision.This reminds when i was in high school i fall in love to girl who have emotional disaster(i don't know what is true name of this)one day she is great,funny,ready to joke,to hang out.Other day she bad,she hate me and everyone,she is screaming at me,don't want to talk,and next day she is great again.I needed time to realize what the f*ck is happening and when i find out i have moved myself.It's so funny when i remember hahah.
     
  3. dogeatdog

    dogeatdog Fapstronaut

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    Hey man, I don't know much about love but my friend gave me a good insight. If you truly like this woman and really wanna spend time with her, you'll be able to get past the fact that she's got schizophrenia and cope with it. If not, I suggest you just drop the possibility of a relationship as soon as possible. It's better to let it go early than to keep the relationship possibly dragging and just being a waste of time.
     
  4. KOD19

    KOD19 Fapstronaut

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    Do it. I didn't even read your post. The title said enough. Do it. I look back now at all the opportunities I missed because I tried to rationalize my whether or not to date someone and missed out on a quality relationship and possibly many more. Do it and come back to tell us how it went.
     
    NF SINCE BIRTH and Action like this.
  5. ShadyPerson

    ShadyPerson Fapstronaut

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    I'd recommend you read about schizophrenia and what it's like to date a person who has it. If it seems too overwhelming to you, don't. If it seems like you could be able to handle it, go for it.
     
    NF SINCE BIRTH and getbetter73 like this.
  6. Homelander

    Homelander Fapstronaut

    This reminds me about my Borderline ex. She mentally destroyed me with her tantrums and confused me when she was suddenly all loving a few hours later.
    From now on I never stick my dick into crazy, not worth the hassle
     
    NF SINCE BIRTH and Rev2.0 like this.
  7. Renember that if she has constant cycles of her mental illness that will be a incredible time spending that will lead you to quitting your job and having financial problems
     
    NF SINCE BIRTH likes this.
  8. Rev2.0

    Rev2.0 Fapstronaut

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    I'd bail. You're not going to "fix" her and if she's managing to cope now through meds that's a dangerous thing because if she ever chooses or is forced to go off them, your life with her could become very unpleasant and possibly even dangerous. Let some other white knight find her and you work on being your best version of you and then a woman will find her way into your life that will bring a lot less drama (or at least drama of a more predictable variety). Good luck whatever you choose.
     
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  9. primaljade

    primaljade Fapstronaut

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    Absolutely not. Girls you date could be girls you get pregnant. Think of what kind of mom you want your kids to have, and what kind of kids you want to have.
     
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  10. ShadyPerson

    ShadyPerson Fapstronaut

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    Okay I hesitated to comment this, but since more and more guys come here acting like this girl is some kind of an evil maniac who needs to be avoided at all costs, I need to say something about it.

    She's a human. I get it, maybe you guys wouldn't want to date someone with a mental illness and that's okay, but going around acting like mentally ill people are always automatically bad news and don't deserve to be loved by anyone is just dehumanizing. I get it, dating someone who is mentally ill comes with a lot of baggage, but honestly so does almost any dating and a lot of mentally ill people can deal with their problems admirably well. So if op is ready to face the possible challenges of the relationship and loves this girl, is there really a reason he shouldn't go for it?
     
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  11. Homelander

    Homelander Fapstronaut


    You have a very valid point. Every human how weird, sick or wrong needs love. However, you should ask yourself if this person, this woman is right for you.
    Because you will never be good enough for the wrong person. I have certain hard criteria a woman should meet before I can consider her girlfriend material and of course
    I will have to meet her requirements as well.

    Each man has to discover what is really important to find in their SO, and what he can give to improve a woman's life. When I was 18 years old I thought I knew what I was looking for, but I was totally wrong.
    Nowadays I stay clear of woman that have a mental illness, drugs/alcohol misuse, criminal involvements, eating problems, etc. because i know this kind of woman will not fit into my future plans.
    But love and hornyness does strange things to a man :)
     
    Last edited: Jan 28, 2020
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  12. ShadyPerson

    ShadyPerson Fapstronaut

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    Agreed. Some people have easier time dealing with a partner with mental illness and might have trouble dealing with other possible flaws. Each for their own. Love is personal and has very few hard rules.
     
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  13. nifahs

    nifahs Fapstronaut

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    I am a dude who has schizophrenia, and to be honest, every body with this diagnosis is different so I cannot speak for her. You have to remember though, her having this diagnosis, doesn't mean she doesn't deserve someone, it's up for you to decide if you are that someone for her.
     
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  14. p1n1983

    p1n1983 Fapstronaut

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    You have low self-esteem right? that's the only way you will consider dating a damaged girl.
    Don´t get me wrong, date her, have fun and hook up with her but casually. Keep yourself available to meet another girl that have her shit toghether to be in a healthy relationship with her.
     
    NF SINCE BIRTH likes this.
  15. Love her but don't fall in love with her. Be a true friend, not just a flirt. Be kind at all costs.
     
    NF SINCE BIRTH likes this.
  16. Thanks everyone. I went off for a couple weeks after posting this. A lot of nice inputs and I think almost all of them have some value. So far I haven't noticed anything really concerning about her. She got a nice sense of humour and we always find something to talk about. She shuts off and gets unresponsive from time to time but I dont take that personally. She just gets distracted and drifts off. I feel like I understand her in that way. I have Schizoaffective disorder myself but I am off my meds and dont experience as many symptoms nowadays.

    I can probably go out and find a less risky option but I feel like we are in the same stage of life. I cant imagine being with her forever but it would be nice getting to know her a little better. Right now she is in hospital because of an infection. She says she gets out tomorrow. I am planning on meeting her.
     
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  17. the awakening

    the awakening Fapstronaut

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    I dont want to look hard on this one but She Has Schizo... that s a huge deal. When you say she sends you mixed signal i think it pretty obvious why
     
    NF SINCE BIRTH likes this.
  18. I dont know. She is soon out of hospital after 3 years. She is cutting down on her medicines and are about to buy her own apartment. She has a bird and are talking about getting a dog. I am getting myself a cat on thursday so RIP family peace :p I like her. I dont know how she is when she is psychotic. I think I am willing to take a chance. If things get too bad I can just get out right?
     
    the awakening likes this.
  19. the awakening

    the awakening Fapstronaut

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    Yeah you're right i mean it's not like you re going to marry her or at least not right away. So yeah take your time and ask yourself if you could see yourself in a longterm realtonship with her.
     
    NF SINCE BIRTH likes this.

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