As you can see, this is my first post on nofap. I’m a believer saved by grace through no work of my own but simply on the love of Jesus Christ. I’m battling porn addiction that has been rooted for 30 years since I was 10. My question for you all is how do you deal with the trigger of loneliness, boredom, and resulting curiosity? I find that when I am by myself or hear I will be by myself, I get triggered into wanting to PMO. I’m going through Covenant Eyes 40 day challenge and one of the challenges is to identify some triggers in efforts to write a ‘U-turn’ or deactivation plan. There are times where I can depend on someone being around like my wife or children but many times that’s not possible. It’s not scalable in that my family won’t or can’t always be around. So I’m looking for help on what you all do. Thanks a bunch!!
You say that you need help when others are not around. I like to read success stories here or go to Youtube and find testimonies of guys who overcame, especially the non-christians. It is inspiring and deadens the drive.
You say you are triggered when you hear you will have time alone. But *what* within you is triggered by this? There must be some desire you are carefully tending within that is ready to spring to life when given the opportunity. If you will kill this off completely, then there will be nothing within you to be lured into lustful desire in these moments. You are never alone if you are in Christ, for he is always with us. His undying life within us does not and cannot know boredom -- we have all of the universe to explore and endless time in which to do so! It is not curiosity that draws a 40-year-old man into PMO, as there is nothing new for you there. It is lust, plain and simple, and until that flame of lust is extinguished, you will continue to be burned by it. Onward and upward! Let's leave the valley behind us for good. Let this be the year of total freedom!
Thanks, you all, for your responses. To answer your question, Tao, metaphysically, it seems like there's just a desire to look and then act out. I rarely look into myself before I do anything. I just go. That clearly shows a selfishness on my part. I think you're right on with the lust because honestly, I just love beautiful women. However, this addiction is not admiration; it's objectification. It's using the created to satisfy my own sinful desires.
