Hard time getting over her

Yes, it happend to me. We were together for almost 4 years, then I ruined everything and she left. That was 2 years ago and I still feel bad.

 

It’s a waste of time for you. You haven’t even met her and imagined a lot. My advice try to completely abstain from any relationship for 1 month at least, stop thinking about her and delete all her contacts/messages, stop visiting her social media pages. ‘Restart’ your life and then, when you are ready, try to create a healthy relationship.

 

I feel you. I had almost the same case as you describe. I am now 7 years older and if there is one crucial, absolutely crucial thing that I have learned, then it is this: no single girl is special. They are all the same. They all feel, they all need, they all cry, they all need. No single girl is the one, there are many others. Let go of her. She is lost and you shouldn't care. What is over, is done. Go find a new one. Do not waste time and energy on her. You will soon forget her. After a while you will laugh and think "why did I care so much about a single woman who wasn't even mine yet". Free yourself, you really don't need her, or any girl. They are only a compliment to your life

 

Why spend 2/3 hours on a day on a girl you never met!
Dude that's where you went absolutely wrong.

 

You should take off the rose tinted glasses and be realistic about the situation. The reality is that you are pining for a version of her that exists only in your head despite evidence saying it’s not real. Having pined over women who left me because of my low self esteem and my own issues from my upbringing, I do get what you are going through. In light of that I’m going to say the following and I wish someone had said this to me back then:
Get back out there and meet someone. You tell yourself to get up off the ground, start moving forward and leave that shit in the past. Don’t bother saying “yeah, but.” Learn to see the world as it really is

 

the reality of the situation is that you've created a completely different person in your head than the one that exists. You say that the situation bothers you because you were looking forward to meeting her one weekend and were excited for what could have been. I say that nothing extraordinary would have happened because judging based off of what you have said, she is not a very kind hearted or genuine person, you only had access to a facade that she was presenting you. Even if the weekend was nice, the future would have been a gloomy disaster as you enter a long-distance relationship with a girl who doesn't care to keep you in her life after things turn south. Seriously, if she was worth her salt she would still keep in contact with you and try and look past your arguments and maintain a friendship, or end on good terms rather than block you from contacting her in every imaginable way. Don't let her steal your dignity, you got this soldier. Be the man you are and use this experience to drive you to succeed in whatever you want to succeed in.

 

The reason why she broke it off before you got together is because you gave too much away at the beginning. When you get into a relationship you gotta give a little at a time so she can want more. If she knows everything about you then you're no longer a mystery. It's the mystery that builds attraction, the tension. Like a suspenseful movie, you cant give away the plot.
Mystery, tension, anxiety, fear, jealousy, anguish, they're the things that build attraction.

My advice, dont get into a phone relationship or internet. When you find a girlfriend and she calls you up and wants to talk, always keep the conversation brief. When you go on a date with a girl dont talk about yourself and if you do talk generally and keep it short. Always keep her guessing, dats the key.

 

Showing some vulnerability is OK in moderation.
Being trustworthy can be shown by NOT opening up. For example; a guy who doesn't smile a lot is considered more trustworthy to women than the guy who smiles all the time. A guy who is overly emotional, sensitive and kind is considered untrustworthy by women compared to a guy who only shows kindness in moderation (when it's earned). This is scientific fact. Nice guys are considered untrustworthy. When you're too kind to women they think you're trying to get something out of them...sex. You gotta put yourself in the position to make the girl do all the trying. Lure them in your direction and that'll make them feel comfortable.

 

Actually it works for sustainability too. Women are wired differently. Once you're in a relationship and you're supportive and emotional you display feminine characteristics. Women feel safe when the man shows strength. Emotions, empathy = weakness. Yes women will say that's what they want in but it's not what they need. They wanna feel protected and secure.

 

did you fuck her?

 

It wouldn’t bug you If she’s having fun with another guy? Don’t do that to yourself. Forget her Follow No contact and continue on your purpose. Find your purpose Stick to it! Once you find your purpose Or create a routine for yourself where you are improving (will take a lot of time) once you feel comfortable and are able to wake up calmly then you’ll know Once you feel better internally Do work externally or at the same time. Once you feel better inside and your outside is showing You are ready! Develop abundance mindset Begin to build up a roster of women (aka go out more Enjoy the world) But never let go of your purpose or give up your time so conveniently. Maybe out of the roster of women you build you’ll be able to connect with one on a deeper level