Has anyone else had problems with gay chat rooms and cam to cam?

Maybe your brain wants to see new things to get that dopamine kick?

 

Ive done this before. I think it dangerous behavior. Yes, I think it’s for you to feel affirmed in your manhood. It feels good to be complimented and to feel like someone else thinks you’re sexy, and for other men to affirm your manliness/manhood. But it’s an unhealthy form to receiving that affirmation. I’m hear if you need to chat about it.

 

I have same issue

 

Yes this is the main issue I came on here for. I know this behavior is a misuse of my sexuality but the affirmation of turning someone on, anyone on, keeps me coming back. My rational brain always know it’s hurting so many aspects of my life but when that craving hits there is ALWAYS a good enough reason for this time to be my last one. Part of the shame was feeling like no one could ever understand why I did this. Truth is, I don’t even understand why. I am not someone with answers quite yet but I’m certainly someone who gets it.

 

this is surprisingly common and im glad i found this site because it finally vindicates me a bit, because i had this pretty bad and had no idea it was a symptom of porn misuse. Read my journal and you’ll find my experience on it.
You’re not alone buddy

 

Yes I have similar experience.

 

Find myself frequently on an anonymous gay hook up site talking with guys. Usually looking for other married men, never would act on it, but the rush involved is addicting......well, duh.

 

Yes. I have the same thing going on. Even though happily married. Even though sex is frequent.

 

I went through that for a short time. I wanted to jerk off in front of girls. But....about 99% of people on those chat rooms are guys so you end up seeing nothing but cock. It seems the arousal of being watched is more important than if it is a girl

 

You’re looking for affirmation. That’s not in and of itself a bad thing. Our culture has just lost the way for men to get that sort of affirmation in a healthy way so it’s all suppressed and distorted.

 

This is genius thinking and analyzation.

 

Happy to find I am not the only one but sad that we do this , divorced man , father and really ashamed of this ! Why do Info it ? No answer yet but yeah it’s like to confirm my manhood through the eyes from other men. I feel disgusting and ashamed when I am done !!!! But than one week later I am back doing the same stupid thing.

 

reminds me of myself at 21. i realized i was doing it for attention, validation n the gay thoughts were very frequent. eventually i started acting on them. it happened when a guy made a pass at me n from there i began indulging in frequent encounters, though i always felt regret after each encounter. but there was craving.

i think it wont take time for your fantasies to turn to actions. now i can say i'm clean but i still wish hadnt begun.

avoid pornography like the plague. watching st8 porn wont compensate for it. avoid the thoughts. no sex scenes on tv. no sex jokes among friends. avoid anything that remotely stimulates you in terms of sex. that has helped me get some clarity.

i still have thoughts but the urges have reduced n porn doesnt interest me much.
i avoid tv as well as i dont want drama in life. novels are better.

if possible seek a therapist. that helped me. venting out helped.

but take nopmo as seriously as one takes surgery.

 

I started those after a lot of PMO, I (once) saw a female on there, it seemed more than a vid, chat seemed to align with unexpected, (got up to close door etc). I think that’s what got me started. But after that it was just guys, and I think the validation etc was what I was seeking.

Really felt empty afterwards, during and before I had fantasies about gay sex, but after I didn’t, I just felt shame and then that led to more PMO, this then led to more shame. I think I just got hooked on the taboo of it, it felt exciting in the moment.

I think the fantasies in my case, even though they were gay fantasies, it was more about the porn than an actual sexual encounter. I can’t imagine actual having sex with a man.

 

Yes, that's why I'm here. I'm comfortable being bisexual but really want to stop this, it's not healthy at all. I kinda get a rush from sending people dick pics tbh. I'm not entirely sure how to stop really

 

Stopping all porn! It just keeps escalating and you might start in something fairly vanilla and before long you’ll be back at the more extreme end.

Im just over a month in, and I’ll be honest I do feel my mind is clearer, I have been seeing a counsellor during this period which is also very useful. If you have that as an option I would recommend it

 

Thanks. I think I can see someone. I definitely want to stop all porn, it just seems really difficult at the moment. One day at a time I guess.
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