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Almost relapsed today (success story)

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by New Account, Feb 18, 2020.

  1. Feb 18, 2020 #1
    New Account

    New Account Fapstronaut

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    As some may know, I have been posting about my struggles fighting the urge to see sex workers. To me, the problem is not so much porn but sex workers (once I discovered how easy it is to see one). I am a 25 year old Canadian male and I lost my virginity to a masseuse at a massage parlour a month ago because I became so frustrated and wanted to know what sex was like. The next day I went again and had sex with another masseuse. After these encounters, I vowed and swore that I will never to do this again. I thought the urge would not come back to haunt me but a few days ago, it did and particularly triggered by an image of a masseuse I saw on the website which aroused me so much. Damn this photo they posted and I am an idiot for visiting the site. My mind was playing tricks on me trying to force me to go and try another girl with a bigger butt that looked so much more arousing than the previous girls I visited. I was fighting this urge and it was so immense over the past few days. I thought this was my chance to be with the girl of my wildest fantasies. Today, I decided to go. I thought that this sadly was it and that I had been defeated.

    On my way to the parlour, I stopped halfway and said to myself: "No. I cannot be this weak." I thought about all the risks involved. What about STDs? What about if police show up since in Canada buying sex is illegal (generally police don't care about enforcing that law when it comes to consenting adults but still, you never know). I literally stopped and went back home. I never thought I would be able to do this.

    I am so proud of myself. If I had gone, I would have spent the rest of my day and maybe week, month. in shame, worry, and disgust. I would have been $300 - $400 dollars poorer. Worse, I would have been succumbing to an addiction that could have been made worse. Yet, now, I am super proud of myself and have gained so much respect for myself.

    I hope this inspires anyone struggling with an addiction. If you have tips for me as to how I can further ward off this urge if it occurs again, please share. I would be so grateful.
     
    Last edited: Feb 18, 2020
    New Account, Feb 18, 2020
    New Account, Feb 18, 2020
    #1
    temptationisfutile, Out of the mess, Tommy1235 and 4 others like this.
  2. Feb 18, 2020 #2
    msterling22s

    msterling22s Fapstronaut

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    congrats man! I can understand how hard it is to fight the mind that is trying to get another fix/high, the way you stopped in mid travel to the place is awesome! that just shows you that you have , and have always had the power to stop yourself!
     
    msterling22s, Feb 18, 2020
    msterling22s, Feb 18, 2020
    #2
  3. Feb 18, 2020 #3
    pump20

    pump20 Fapstronaut

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    Amen bud. Controlling your mind is very important. Keep up the good work
     
    pump20, Feb 18, 2020
    pump20, Feb 18, 2020
    #3
  4. Feb 19, 2020 #4
    PowerfulSRE

    PowerfulSRE Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    Gz! Keep up the good work!!
     
    PowerfulSRE, Feb 19, 2020
    PowerfulSRE, Feb 19, 2020
    #4
  5. Feb 19, 2020 #5
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Dayum! 400$ is not worth it. That's a good new Dell laptop right there. Better get yourself good education on how to trade stocks or bitcoin. Look up coinstreet trading club if you want a good teacher. Anyway, now you learned that you cant look at those pictures and browse sites that your mind wants you to look in. I think I haven't searched for any pics on this streak. Still with our power and motivation, we can stay back from addictions only a while. For infinite streaks, we need to admit our weakness and rely on higher power - God and Jesus Christ. The spiritual world is real and you know before something happens in the physical world it happens in the spiritual world first. You know that it was not good spirits that made you look for sex workers and browse those sites. Sure, dark side is interested in your relapses. But God is interested in saving you from all evil and doing good. All you have to do is to choose who to serve. Choice happens every day and sometimes the dark side can trick you more or less but you can always ask and pray to God for help. No PMO is one guideline for higher quality life and relationships. I hope you will follow it and discover many more good things that helps fight the sinful human nature.
     
    Deleted Account, Feb 19, 2020
    Deleted Account, Feb 19, 2020
    #5
    ELITE2BE and PowerfulSRE like this.
  6. Feb 19, 2020 #6
    Tommy1235

    Tommy1235 Fapstronaut
    NoFap Defender

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    Congratulations, I admire your willpower, very inspiring and motivating. Stay vigilant.
     
    Tommy1235, Feb 19, 2020
    Tommy1235, Feb 19, 2020
    #6
  7. Feb 20, 2020 #7
    hubbawulf1234

    hubbawulf1234 Fapstronaut

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    That's awesome to read! I agree we give our mind too much power. The mind controls the body, but who controls the mind? We give it full reign and autonomy! Gotta rangle the mind in and learn to make it our servant, not master!
     
    hubbawulf1234, Feb 20, 2020
    hubbawulf1234, Feb 20, 2020
    #7
  8. Feb 20, 2020 #8
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Spirit controls the mind. So one might want to look into the spiritual side of things. Sure these days there are many ways to become a spiritual person, but the shortest way is Christianity.
     
    Deleted Account, Feb 20, 2020
    Deleted Account, Feb 20, 2020
    #8
    hubbawulf1234 likes this.
  9. Feb 20, 2020 #9
    hubbawulf1234

    hubbawulf1234 Fapstronaut

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    Totally agree @pcmaster

    If you don't want to trust in Jesus Christ, at bare minimum you need to develop a strong moral compass.
     
    hubbawulf1234, Feb 20, 2020
    hubbawulf1234, Feb 20, 2020
    #9

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