Is it really that hard to make friends nowadays, or am I just imagining things?

I think part of the problem is that social media has distorted reality. But if you live in America, I mean it could be economic. I think too many people are too busy working two or three jobs to put food on the table. Hopefully, that changes soon.

 

At least your trying, lol. I sometimes wonder if I’m doing something wrong or I’m just being weird.

 

Social media has absolutely changed things. People have their own circle and it’s hard to get in there and join them. People are going about their day more than ever and just want to be left alone to get through it.

 

Social Media ruins everything, haha.

 

Social media is the enemy of man, no question, but we all steer our own ship. We buy into the ease of it. We like reading things and people we agree with, rather than thinking, we like pretending we are communicating rather than reaching out and being reached. And there is a lot of money being made by people leading us down this path. We will get worse before we get better.

 

Yep. But it’s also just how things are these days. Remember MySpace? Most people don’t use it anymore. Social media may be a fad, one day, we never know.

 

But true, unfortunately.

 

friends become less important as you get older. after a certain age your priority is to find a SO that you can arry and have kids with. Friends is a life stage for HS and early on in college. The point is to meet a girl and bond your destinies together and spend time with her. Old guys who spend time with their friends are mostly sexless virgins that no girl took

 

All of these three seem exaggerated, overly generalised statements. That might be fine for your point, but I wanted to point it out.

As to the topic of the thread: I also struggle with this. I do not yet have a solution, besides getting a girlfriend. But I think I'd have to get lucky for that, and I can't do much for it.

 

For me it is hard to make new friends.Most people nowadays seems like not being interested in true friendship.

 

Wait, whom?

 

I dont think it is that hard to find new friends really. It is easy to start drifting off into social media, depression, PMO, Netflix. So many ways to get distracted from living real life. Go outside and start walking around.

1. You will find a million people looking for friends just like you.

2. You will see some inspiring people dancing their way trough life. Watch them and copy their behaviour.

 

This. Since I've actively started breaking out of my social isolation and learning more and more skills to connect with people and be more at peace with myself etc etc (and yes, that also includes the dreaded and hated "small talk" that so many people here seem to find annoying unfortunately) I've also noticed that if you know how to open up yourself and open up other people a bit many of them are very eager to connect.
It seems to me like the cliché of "humans are social creatures" is just very, very true. Not just true. VERY true lol

But connecting with people feels more like an art to me than a science. Even though we are very social creatures not all people feel like connecting with everybody all the time obviously.
It's more like a dance in which you and another person pick up on the vibe of the other person, at the same time express your own and see how the two mix and match and maybe flow well together or get each other stuck constantly.

Directly @leetspeak I really like that you are taking action and not just ruminating on it and reading about it.
My guess is that you may be very rusty/inexperienced when it comes to making friends and it simply doesn't come easily to you yet as it's a certain set of skills that you have to learn.
And you wouldn't expect yourself to let's say play in the NBA a month after you touched a basketball for the first time.
Of course you don't need to be a master to make friends but you get my point.
I still have problems after getting into it after years of intense social anxiety but it's getting better and better and by now I am seriously questioning if I ever really was a real introvert as I just love meeting people more and more simply for the sake of meeting them. I am really enjyoing the process.

My question would be if you have actually consciously been setting out to work on a few skills (or even thought about what skills that might be to begin with) or simply going out and "winging it"?

 

Ah. Well, in any case nobody has called him a troll here, and there wouldn't be any reason to.

Ah no, I didn't.