THE 100 DAY SPARTAN CHALLENGE (OPEN)

Checking in: Day fourteen.

 

Day 9

 

Still sick so I am again taking off work today.

Didn't sleep much last night, either.

Work is very stressful now. More layoffs were announced unexpectedly yesterday. I am having a really challenging time focusing on my job. I continue to question my desire and ability to do my job, and now I'm again wondering if I'll be laid off soon. In short: work feels like a haven of negativity and stress, and I feel angry and resentful about it.

I have a great weekend planned, so hopefully I'll get past this cold soon, and be able to distract myself/forget about the shitty workplace conditions.

Big test right now. I am angry, worried, and tired, and I'll be alone the next few days, lying in bed resting, which will be good for me, but this is also fertile ground for a relapse. I don't want that to happen, especially right now. So I am writing this to reinforce my remaining vigilant.

I'm just really thankful that I'll be away from the office for the next few days.

 

day 42 checking in

 

I've never officially met him, but over the past several years I've seen him in public on several occasions. We trained at the same gym in Clearwater Beach (a really small gym owned by a former WWE wrestler); and, I boarded a plane from Tampa to LA, and he sat one row away from me, in 1st Class.

He is a native of Tampa and lives in the St. Pete-Clearwater area, so it is not that rare to see him out in public.

On Tuesday afternoon I went to my favorite car wash and he was there, too, so while we were waiting for our cars to be done I asked him if he was still training at the same gym in Clearwater Beach. Only a few minutes of conversation and I didn't speak much at all. I just listened, but I enjoyed listening to him. I grew up watching wrestling and I always liked watching the Hulkster. He has always seemingly been very respectful and kind and humble when he's out in public.

 

Three more days and you got rank. You are doing awesome! Thank you for your daily check-ins and for sharing your triumphs and struggles.

 

Keep the legacy going my friends. Sparta needs more Top of Recruits, more Spartan Commanders, and Generals, and more Gods of War!

 

Congrats on 35 days! Thank you for your consistency, your daily devotion to this challenge. I'd love to see you go all the way my friend.

Allowing myself to fail is one of the best things I've ever discovered about life. I used to think that it was bad to fail. Now I realize that failure almost always precedes success. Thank you for reminding me of this.

 

Day 0 checking in.
Starting again with all of you my friends.
Few days ago I said I was raising the bar, and I reflected about this, because I was doing it, but the events let me know that I am not so prepared. So I needed a fresh start. I failed, it's true.
But as for the last time, I learned from my mistake.
I set up meeting my goals, but PMO is in goals so, as I promised, I am raising that bar.
A little spartan boy is in front of you.
But not for long.

 

I respectfully disagree my friend

The man in front of me is a God of War (nobody can EVER take that away from you).

And in my mind you always will be a God of War.

 

Check in day 36. Yesterday was one of my most difficult days during this challenge. I was depressed and angry due to many things and wanted to self medicate with pmo. But then I remembered why this is so important. I’m trying to rewire my brain. It’s going to take a while for my brain to fully recover from all the damage I’ve done. Just one day at a time.

 

Ba

Back to the eligible for spartan army rank good work!

 

Times like these are tough. All you can do is focus on what you can control. Easier said than done I know. Glad you are here Spartan. Your tenacity so far has inspired me and I am certain I am not alone

 

That’s amazing! I watched him growing up too. My head would explode if I actually talked to him at a car wash!

 

I agree with @Espi1971 you are a god of war. This single release does not define you. Nearly a year of no pmo under your belt with your two streaks. You are an incredible warrior. And I will continue to look down the road ahead of me to see you leading the way. You’ve made such an impact here. A-Hoo!!!!

 

Day zero
Anexity is the reason for this relapse.
I literally don't want to but I got out of my control and got into autopilot mode and thus followed the regular procedure like what I used to do when I can't handle such type of emotions.
But this time it was totally different. This I felt like I didn't want to do but my mind was craving for nudes. I'm not able to explain but this is like you don't want to do something but circumstances forced you to do.
This is I think is a type of recovery because everytime I did PMO one time and then craving for one more dose and more and more but this time I was satisfied with one only.
So I can't give up now as far as I know I can do it and overcome this dark side of me..

 

Check in Day 1(49)

Hello Spartans,

Had another busy day with little time to focus on my project. I’ve got my day cleared for tomorrow and hopefully I can squeeze in a few hours.

One inch at a time, gentlemen.

 

Day 48, checking in.

Glory To God!

 

Day 8

 

Thanks my friend. It doesn't matter how much we lose we can do this certainly ...
Unfortunately my English is so bad because I'm lazy ...
Day 10