How did your addiction start?

Early 1970s, magazines first then after internet 1990s it exploded in use for me.

 

I'd say I was horny since I was 6, I used to watch erotic nudes since I was 10 (Internet), one day I had a boner when I was 12 and it was weird so I tried to calm it down with my hand something happened and I couldn't resist myself from intense pleasure 2 days after that incident and a lot more times. The intense pleasure became dull numbing pleasure and I grew more anxious everyday to the point I had stage fear worse than death. It ruined my life as I couldn't really improve myself through my teenage years, couldn't be popular in school and I became "dumb" although I wasn't originally, I don't know why nobody has reported becoming "dumb" due to fapping (brain fog, 0 self improvement skills, being numb to environment (no alertness), no creativity, no confidence). Nofap is an essential thing during puberty according to me. People should be
"Charming" naturally but I had become dreadful and nobody really liked me.

 

It all starts so casually. Next thing you know you’re looking at really weird stuff, creepy stuff you’d never think about in real life. I envy people who have no interest in P.

 

It all started with me searching "nude pictures" online...

 

I had a similar experience. When I was young (80s and 90s), I looked at these magazines. I also had VHS tapes that I recorded music videos and commercials on. It is funny that I thought that these comparatively tame videos were super exciting. Actually, I guess it is not really funny, but it reflects more of what is "natural." When I got the internet in my house (10th grade) I started to look for newsgroups on AOL. Then in college, I had internet in my own room and it got out of control.

 

on an online forum.

it's going to end on one too

 

Started with a VHS tape that I stole off someone’s porch. I didn’t know porn was inside the package, I was just being a bad kid and took someone’s mail and ran off. When I got home, I opened the box and there was a tape inside, I popped that tape into the VCR and it was porn! I watched that tape so many times that it barely worked anymore after a while.

 

I didn't look up porn until I was about 13 years old. But I forgot about it after. Now here's a funny story. I started to watch wrestling at the same age, and I looked up girls who used to be in WWE. Then at 14, when I was finishing 9th grade, my old friends dared me to jerk off either in the shower or in my bedroom. I didn't believe them at first. But then somehow in a few days later when I was in my room at night, that's when I started to jerk off. Then the rest was history.

 

Found my dads playboy and porn VHS collection way before the internet era. I dont blame anyone because i made the choice to look at them . I am now accpeting resonsbiblity for my actions no one forced me to watch porn or read playboy and by not playing the victim and blaming i am taking control of my life.

 

6 or 7 years old. Bullied at school, no friends, father rarely present and back then mother was dealing with a bunch of her own shit that made her a very poor parent (she's in a better place now but the damage unfortunately is done, no hard feelings). Felt like I was a victim of circumstance with no outlet to speak of. Discovered masturbation and relished the escapism like a drug. Ended up developing dependence especially after discovering porn which made it so much better. Cue over a decade of mental, physical and social regression.

Only way to get out of it was to adopt the opposite mindset to a victim's mindset. The only thing trying to force me to continue living like that is myself, ergo the only thing that can stop me from living like that is also myself.

 

Probably some stupid google search, shortly after sex ed classes were through and I understood what sex was. I didn't know how to turn off safe search so I got mostly tame results at first, then as I got older I figured out about Pornhub. Must have been 12 years old. Although porn was never really the issue. Masturbation has been the main thing. Porn just makes it worse.

 

This happened when i was 15. Ive had Depression since i was 10, Because of things Like bullying, lack of support from my family back then and a lot of suffering from a teacher and school principal who was for lack of a better Word a psychopath.
In 2005 i turned 15 and was head over heels with a girl in my classroom, as i was socially inept with these things i never talked to her and i grew to be really obsessed. The school year ended and i was left devastated, broken. In my Depression i turned to porn sites i heard about, and things went downhill from there. I had no idea what it was Like to have your love Being recíprocal so in my mind those women those models were the perfect partners. This went on for many years and with messier stuff, Even with anime girls and waifus in the mix. Which in turn led to a pointless pursuit for the "perfect" woman and partner.

 

I was at a friend's house when they showed porn on their TV and we stayed for hours watching that shit, after that the seek for porn became a big thing and little did i know it changed my life forever... for the worst.
Good thing i know now about nofap and things are getting better.

 

About the same. I was the late 90s so I found a magazine in my grandads gun cabinet. Then a friend's dad had a HUGE stack of magazines from the 70s, 80s, and 90s. It was like a time machine lol Then of course the internet. I bought a venus fly trap and looked up how to care for it...on netscape navigator. Found a site and it was over. I remember my 1st all night binger. I was maybe 13 and stayed up all night looking for free P. Of course it wasn't free back then. Sometimes you could find sites that would post username and passwords that could get you into those sites. It was like Gameshark for PMO lol

 

I got the Guinness book of world records 2009 and I saw Maxi Mounds (Biggest implants in female mammary glands). It got worse until it turned into masturbation and eventually I found videos. I have been addicted since and I only started my reboot a couple months ago.

 

In the late 1980s my step-brother had a porn movie. Me and a couple of friends decided to watch.

When the sex began, we were all disgusted and turned off the video and hid it under the couch.

A few days later, I was sick from school. I checked out the video and was instantly aroused by it. My dick went hard and I opened my pants to let it out. Watching the video and stroking, I came for the first time. I was hooked.

There were some other videos under the couch and an uncle of mine had some porn, so I got my fix from that limited exposure. When I turned 18, I was able to buy my own porn and I did not hesitate to visit the nearby adult store.

When porn came out on paid streaming sites, I subscribed for hours and hours of PMO.

After tube sites came, I was even able to track down that very first movie, almost a reunion PMOing to it.

Even though I do not like the porn of today, I still find myself addicted to the porn of yesterday.

 

First use of porn was a dodgy quality video tape in the mid 90's that some kids at school found at their house. Addiction started with dial up internet. It would just be photos of girls topless, that was enough for me to get off. Then clicked on all the available categories. I was simply curious. Then I would download 2mb video mpg clips then piece them together on a video editing program. Then I would create a whole fucking library on most categories that excited me and I would edit 'favourite' clips and save them on a USB drive. Sometimes I would edit the sound! I thought this was normal! I did this for years. Now I am disgusted looking back on it. It has ruined my life for the past two decades. It's not getting any better with all the fucked up categories available today. The only good thing I suppose is that because I have exhausted most categories and no longer get aroused by them, porn is quite boring to me now and takes me an absolute age to find something arousing. Hopefully this boredom will be the end of it because I am completely sick of porn and masturbation. I have not achieved anything I am proud of over this period of time. Such a fucking waste.

 

I was desperate for sex from about age 12. Started masturbating with my hand, just sensation. Later I would memorise images of women scantily clad, naked or in sex scenes from TV programmes and replay them in my mind in bed. A porn mag did the rounds at school and I kept it. That kept me going possibly for years. I can still remember a lot of the images from it, even some of the feature articles and adverts. Got into VHS porn via my father aged around 15, which makes it nearly 30 years ago. He asked me to tape a film off satellite TV when he was away. Surely he must have known I would watch it. I borrowed one of his tapes and watched it until the tape started to wear out. I was doing it a lot, maybe nearly every night. I could probably remember almost all of that film now if I wanted to risk thinking about it, which I don't.

Left home for university, no TV, no video, no internet, so no porn, but I was still masturbating to fantasies and memories (mostly of real sexual experiences) quite a lot. Then one day along comes the internet, waiting for those tiny videos to download... the habit came back full force after several years. Since then I have had periods of years without even thinking about it, but it can still come back full force.

I need to stop reviewing these memories now.