Screen-free kids

Well, no I don't know any community.

if you really wish to improve the situation. How about spending some quality time with your son or daughter?
Make a family trip? Go to a soccer game?

Or if you can't beat it, join it?
Watch a movie together with your children?
"Screens" can be educational, or improve your childrens social life far more than you seem to realize?
What if all the other kids are for example on facebook? And no "screen" would turn him or her into an outsider?

If you're afraid of pornographic imagery, it's your choice, not your childrens.
What you forbid can become most desireably. Just try to teach morals and guidelines, without chaining someone to your own opinion.

 

I grew up in a house like this. No cable tv, limited internet and no cellphones. We were allowed to watch tv or use the computer for 1 hour a day, and that was only if we completed all of our schoolwork and household chores. I didn't get a smartphone until I was 21.

I may not have liked it at the time, but I look at it as a very important cornerstone in my childhood. I had all the time in the world to pursue interests that I still hold today, and habits regarding time management and self discipline were cemented early and often. I'm happy that I can look back and say that I had a real childhood.

 

Honestly, in my experience growing up, most of my friends that had extremely strict parents ended up not being able to handle life very well when they grew up.

I have several friends who were denied any kind of sweets, and later in life they basically went crazy with junk food once they were old enough to be able to have whatever they want.

On the contrary, my parents were a lot less strict, and I never had any issues with keeping things in moderation.

I don't like the idea of kids being hooked on screens 24/7, but I also think denying them completely is unnecessary and will probably give them some issues in the future.

The biggest piece of advice I would say, though, in general, is to put the focus on what they DO have rather than what they DON'T have. If you give them fun things to do that don't involve screens, they won't care that they are being denied something.

I watched a pretty good amount of TV growing up, and I gotta say, I think I'm a pretty well-adjusted person. I also learned a lot from TV shows and computer games. Screens aren't evil. There is some good there, but moderation might be good as well.

 

I'm not saying this to argue, but just to give an alternate perspective. I had all of these things as well, and I watched a lot of TV and played computer games, used social media, etc.

I think making screens some kind of horrible thing in your mind is the wrong focus to have. Focus on raising your kids with proper morals and good habits, etc. Whether or not they watch TV isn't as big of a deal as a lot of people seem to think it is. I've met some super out-of-touch people who never watched TV, and I've met plenty of really kind awesome people who watched as much TV as they wanted to.

To me, what matters is that my kids are following God and having good moral values, being kind to others, etc. I would say whether you limit screen time or not, remember that the screens aren't what matters the most, and it's not the end of the world if your kid watches a lot of TV.

 

My post was not an exhaustive list of parenting techniques that I'll use on my children. I was raised on a strong moral diet -- pastor father and whatnot. Though I didn't mention that because it was not relevant to the OP. One can raise children on good moral grounds while also restricting potential pitfalls towards their growth. These ideas are not mutually exclusive.

I should clarify, television was probably the least harmful element that was restricted when I grew up. If anything, the only thing I gained from limited television was extra time on my hands, which turned out to be a valuable thing for me. But maybe not for others.

The restrictions which proved to be the most beneficial where those dealing with hyper stimulating material. Social media, internet, video games etc. Their effects on dopamine neurotransmitters and reward circuitry is unobjectionable in my mind, and more and more peer review is supporting this position. Even Gary Wilson, who founded yourbrainonporn, links over 100 studies on internet addiction/video games on his website. Surely he sees the trend.

I'm an educator for college aged students at an international flight school. The students are required to be on property for 8 hours a day as per their Visa, so I get a good look at how they spend their free time.

After working with a particularly unmotivated and unfocused group of students, I set out to raise awareness on screen usage and how it could be affecting the school's output of pilots. I took volunteers that allowed me to track and quantify their daily screen usage so I could help them visualize a possible trend. This post summarizes the findings.

Around 8 hours a day of phone time from the students. Some as high as 12 hours a day. They were almost as surprised as I was. We spent the next few weeks challenging each other to improve these numbers. "Whoever uses their phone the most this week has to buy lunch". That sort of thing.

These are not high schoolers that don't want to be at school. These are students that are living out a dream, yet I can't have an hour long ground class without them compulsively checking their devices. This is a position that is held by more and more educators today (Mark Bauerlein's The Dumbest Generation is a great book on this).

It's up to parents to decide how they will approach these issues, but it should come from an educated stance. Preaching "moderation" in the face of addictive stimuli is an unwise position. Members of a forum like this should know that very well.

 

Of course... I wasn't implying that they are. I was simply saying it's good to remember what the main focus should be, because I see so many parents getting worried about the little things so much that they think they're going to completely ruin their kids lives if they watch too much TV or something. My point was, whether you decide to restrict TV or not, don't worry too much one way or the other.

Eh, that's somewhat debatable. Video games can also be used for a lot of good things. My nephew with autism uses video games to help develop his fine motor skills, for example.

Will all due respect, that's entirely your opinion. And comparing screen time to porn addiction is quite ridiculous. Moderation of screen time is perfectly reasonable.

I also have no issue with someone not wanting their kids to have screens at all, if that's what they choose. I'm not saying I'm against that. But saying it's "unwise" to say that it's okay to allow kids screen time in moderation, is 100% your opinion, not some scientifically proven fact.

I'm not really trying to start an arguement about this. I just wanted to share an alternate perspective. This is all a matter of opinions. We can just agree to disagree.

 

It's a difficult choice, I do not believe 100% zero screen-time will benefit a lot. furthermore, it seems to me it is also impossible to live without screens these days. However, you can moderate screen time ofcourse and invest in family activities. Some rules could be helpful, like no phones allowed while having diner. I have installed a timer app wich automatically turns my phone offline after two hours of use. In this way, I only use my phone productively. But this requires also a bit of discipline.

 

I don’t have a family but you can be sure my children wouldn’t use screen 8h/day like my nephew.
I spent too much time on a screen at a time when I was suppose to socialize and I think it had a big impact on how I behave now. I don’t want them to do the same thing.

i won’t probably go no screen at all because in the modern world you need that but clearly with some restriction and heavy parental control.

And for porn I will do everything in my power for them not to see it at a young age. I won’t be able to preserve them for their whole life, but at least they won’t become addict at 13.

 

Something to keep in mind is the future of technology and careers. So many things are being automated these days, and most of the best, highest paying jobs involve a lot of technology. So it really might not be wise to raise kids that aren't comfortable using technology.

 

That's pretty neat, what app is it?

 

You have it by default on iOS.

 

Just search for timer app in the google play store, there are different apps which you could choose.

 

A faithful KJV Biblical church (usually a "fundamental baptist")
Try this magazine from No Greater Joy ministries (it's about a husband and wife and their family living biblically) as well on raising kids: https://nogreaterjoy.org/magazine/