PIED cured (how I did it)

During your nofap did you just avoid porn, or did you have occasions when you looked at IG or some girls twerking etc?

 

Accidents are fine and potentially even beneficial, unless they lead to relapse. However, if you are actively seeking out these images or lingering for more than the time it takes to quickly look away, you are impairing your recovery.

 

Thanks for the reply, I'm not scared of relapse (as in MO) currently. This whole mess has destroyed a lot for me, and I definitely don't feel like touching myself to porn at all. The problem is I'm getting the urge to peek at short videos of sexy women etc. I'm on a 12 day streak and I have looked 3 times for not more than 15 seconds I'd say. The urge is often so strong that sometimes I open some videos of twerking girls on tabs then close them. Just trying to keep my head clean but it's difficult. Any advice?

 

Meditation can definitely help with this. However, the only real cure for addiction is building a life compelling enough that you're intrinsically motivated to pursue higher consciousness goals. Otherwise you'll be more likely to replace one addiction with another. Even healthy addictions such as the gym. Meditation and defining one's own life both promote emotional health and well-being, which is the antithesis to the addicted mind.

 

Bro, what about your libido.


Here is a short story to understand my question..

Hey guys . First of all thanks to everybody reading this . I could use some help.


So , long story short im a long time addict . Exposed to P since i was 6, and an extreme addict since . Just like a lot of you here P morphed my view on life and relationships. In my latest years i struggled HOCD, bi cravings , and eventually a severe PIED.

2 years ago i found Nofap and started my first official reboot. Since then i had a few relapses and got involved with some girls.

I ve had intercourse a few times these 2 years but always with some external help of different pills and substances. I suffer from severe anxiety when it comes to performing and i need a boost especially the first times.

After i pass that i find it easier and anxiety kinda wears off, and i find it easier to obtain an erection when cuddling with a girl.

One of the biggest issues is that i also suffer from a lack of libido. A severe lack of libido.

I ve read around here that is something pretty common and that it will take some time . Im curious how you guys battle that .

At this moment im single so the possibility of a rewiring and sharing some intimate moments ( not sex) with a female is out of the question.

I did some blood tests a few months ago and my T levels were ok, but i still dont feel the need for sex.Even if i like somebody and i mentally would like to engage in something , im missing that urge.

Recently i was touching my parts to see what i feel down there as i dont have no reactions beside some morning wood.

I discovered that i do feel something during stimulation, but i cant get hard. Like i could reach O but only being like 30% erect .

Anybody went thru something similar ? Any suggestions ?


Thanks in advance .

 

It’s sounding to me like anxiety may still be the issue for you. I’m similar in that way. Anxiety can cause you to be overwhelmed by fight or flight instinct. This translates into a loss of libido and loss of interest in sex, because sex becomes the source of that anxiety. It’s your body’s way of protecting itself from the possibility of a painful situation.

Since I’m still in the middle of my reboot process, I can’t really speak for my end goal. But one way I’ve coped with this in my previous relationship, that actually got me to succeed in erections for sex, was to focus on my partner. But more specifically, pick something specific to focus on. I chose her breath, out of all things. I started to “swallow” her breath, taking it in and telling myself “It’s the breath of a beautiful woman, and it tastes amazing!” That worked pretty well for me. But it DID take having a partner to accomplish that. So at the moment, I believe your anxiety might be something to work on more.

 

Dude , first of all thanks . It was a great reply . Deep enough to reach the point . You are right, anxiety is still with me , and since a long time back.
See , i had some libido and induced ED problems way before i discovered nofap.
Raising up i never had that crazy urge to pursue a girl because i was getting more than i could ever dream at home, in front of my pc. I never understood why guys go thru so much trouble for a kiss or a making out session. I had it all at the tips of my fingers .
Later i had my first sexual experience and it was all nice , i loved it. It went on for a few months with this very open girl. But after she was out of the picture , i went back to P. I guess thats the point when my ED started to develop.
Then i met this nice girl. She was a virgin. I found that out the first night we tried to sleep together . I couldnt get an erection. I blamed it on the fact that i was drinking , surroundings , etc . Anything but me.
She was ok with it that time , but then more occasions occurred , and i still couldnt do anything . It became more and more like a burden, and it got stuck in my head that there is a problem, which i medicated with more and more P.
Years later when i had my first serious relationship i started feeling that anxiety around my gf at that time. I wasnt the same guys that i was a few years back. And i never stoped watching P all that time.
Now sexy time was already a lot of pressure and anxiety was taking control every time. We had sex occasionally but it wasnt something special. I wasnt performing like i was supposed to.
Then came the first girl i ever loved . I refused to get with this girl for nearly 6 months because of my fear . She liked me a lot and pursued me like crazy. She did everything possible to be my gf . I liked her but the idea that i cant have sex and the shame that came with it was too powerful. One night we got really drunk and ended up at my place having sex. I was amazed that i could do it and we continued for some weeks . It was very exciting , but after a while it became dull. She wasnt bringing to the table the same amount of chemicals as P was , so i went back to my old habit. Of course the intensity and quality of our sex life went down. I was happy in the nights she didnt want to have sex . I use to wait for
Her to fall asleep so i can watch P. That period i developed my s***y fetish and started getting aroused by guys and g*y P.I really loved her but i couldn't stop. After 4 years of relationship i found out she was cheating on me (no shit). I was devastated. So much i had to leave the country just to feel im far from her .
the next 2 years were full of alcohol, drugs and tons of P , daily . I “medicated “ myself until i forgot who i was . This had a major impact on my personality , confidence and so on.
when i returned home i was scared , shy and fearful towards women. These 2 years i never even touched another girl.
After a few months i met this nice girl. She really liked me and invited my to her place . Of course all my fears and past traumas came to life , but i knew i have to do something to pass this episode . So i prepared a little before by edging , a trick that was useful in the past .
That night it was impossible for me to get hard . She was pretty ok with it but i wasnt . I really liked her and i couldn't believe that i didnt get any reactions from down there around this beautiful chick.
It killed me , i went home and started crying , scared like fuck. I swore i would give up P entirely if i escape this nightmare.
Next day i went to a doctor . We talked about a lot of stuff but i never mentioned my P addiction. Part of me was still denying it could have any effect. The guy gave me some liquid to drink daily . A few drops and a couple of days i was recovered. Im pretty sure it was more a placebo effect , but it worked . I spend some weeks with this girl, but again i went back to P. I was so eager to leave her place in the morning so i can go home and PMO.
After some time we broke up and i was again alone with my P. Next came some time with different girls. But this time i was using different pills or enhancement products . The pied and anxiety was severe at the first contact . After 2-3 sessions i could perform without any help, but after i would always end up pmo.
First time with a girl became a nightmare for me . The same and guilt i experienced was so high that many times i refused a lot of girls who liked me just to escape this burden. Sex with a beautiful girl became a burden for me . Pmo was the easiest way out .
this continued until 2018 when yet again i failed to perform in front of a very nice girl, despite everything she did to help me . That was my wake up call. Next day i joined nofap. A long and hard journey began. I ve had a few girls in these 2 years . Of course anxiety is still
There . And after every girl , after i manage to beat my pied something happens and i End up alone , and i always relapse . My last relapse was 2 months ago. Im currently 67 days into what i hope to be my last reboot. There is much more to my past that makes me relapse so fast , but that maybe another time .
So when you told me that this is my body's reaction to prevent another painful event i was like , yea, that makes sense cuz i always felt this . It was so present in my life and i always thought there is something wrong and that its better to just stay away than to make a full of myself again.
unfortunately i am single now and again i have to Start from 0 with a new girl. New girls scare me . A lot . But i guess one have to start from somewhere.
Bro thanks a lot for that message and sorry if i bored You with my story . I just felt the need to share . Maybe because i dont do it often and i appreciated your answer .
take care

 

It is SCARY how similar your situation is to mine! The ex that I was mentioning lived over an hour away from me. I spent 3-4 days each week at her place. We had trouble in the beginning of our relationship. But with a bit of work, sex got to be pretty good. For a while. I never stopped using porn during that relationship, which eventually led to a few failed attempts at sex. One failure likely leads to another, and another.... etc. because of the anxiety built up. When I was at home, I would give myself a “release,” but then made sure not to masturbate for a couple days in anticipation of my next visit. But while there, I had no interest in sex. I was avoiding it. Come the morning of me heading back to my place each week, she would always leave to go to work before I woke up. And just like you, I couldn’t wait to get home to PMO. In fact, there were many times when I would pull out my phone and PMO before even leaving her place! It was ridiculous! Here was this actual woman waiting for sex all weekend, only to have me withhold it so I could PMO by myself! I started to get the sense that I had a problem at that point.

It’s a weird situation, right? I’ve never really considered myself a ladies man. But I also don’t have much issue in talking to and dating attractive women, when I want to. I’ve definitely had stretches of high anxiety and depression, where I actually convince myself that women don’t like me. But then I work through it, and find myself with unbelievably cute women! But my body fails me often, and it has actually driven some of them away.

You didn’t bore me with your story, man. If anything, it’s very nice to hear a story that is so relatable!