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18 years old and couldn't stay hard

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by an0n8200, Mar 13, 2020.

  1. Mar 13, 2020 #1
    an0n8200

    an0n8200 Fapstronaut

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    - possibly sensitive words used -

    I'm getting close with this girl who I'm really attracted to. I've been around her house 3 days in a row. For the last 2, I've been hard the entire time until she takes my dick out. I don't know if it's nerves or the fact that the bj kind of hurt (I've told her about this so it shouldn't hurt in the future) but I lose my erection and we have to stop. With the handjob, I barely felt anything.

    It's so stupid. I don't know if my p addiction has caused this. What 18 year old can't keep a boner with a hot girl? Does anyone have any advice?

    She's really nice and understanding but I'm scared she'll get fed up. I'm just so frustrated and confused
     
    an0n8200, Mar 13, 2020
    an0n8200, Mar 13, 2020
    #1
    Ja3 and IbrahimViking like this.
  2. Mar 13, 2020 #2
    IbrahimViking

    IbrahimViking Fapstronaut

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    Yes, it is psychological, yes, quitting porn and masturbation will help the condition. But also, you have gotta allow yourself to be nervous and be soft and be embarrassed, resisting what you don't like does not relax you, the anxiety over it does not help you overcome it. So find ways to accept what is happening while knowing that your brain will rewire after the only sexual outlet is with the girl.
    And no, she will not get fed up, if you show her you care and be open with her that this is the anxiety and that you do find her very attractive. We don't think about your dick 24/7 as you guys seem to do :p , but sometimes we feel insecure and want to know that you think we are sexy (only if you really do), even if seemingly we know that, and act very confident - still nice to be told so.
    Relax and remember that as you ease into the relationship, and as you get used to being sexual with another person (not just in privacy of your computer), your body and brain will automatically help you, you don't have to push too hard, just get comfortable with the new. And don't fap - that just sends you back to old neural pathways. You're doing great, and you came to the right place.
     
    Last edited: Apr 26, 2020
    IbrahimViking, Mar 13, 2020
    IbrahimViking, Mar 13, 2020
    #2
    Branchman, Ja3, an0n8200 and 1 other person like this.
  3. Mar 13, 2020 #3
    an0n8200

    an0n8200 Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for that. When it was happening all that could go through my head was 'oh god why is it going soft' and that was probably just making it worse. I should accept it and relax more
     
    an0n8200, Mar 13, 2020
    an0n8200, Mar 13, 2020
    #3
    IbrahimViking and Bhap like this.
  4. Mar 29, 2020 #4
    Ghost in the Shell

    Ghost in the Shell Fapstronaut

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    My Journal
    Happened to me when I was 17.
     
    Ghost in the Shell, Mar 29, 2020
    Ghost in the Shell, Mar 29, 2020
    #4
    IbrahimViking and Bhap like this.
  5. Mar 30, 2020 #5
    an0n8200

    an0n8200 Fapstronaut

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    Guys, I've realised the reason. My mental health was really bad at that time. I feel a bit better now and I've been able to keep hard
     
    an0n8200, Mar 30, 2020
    an0n8200, Mar 30, 2020
    #5
    IbrahimViking, sd1 and Bhap like this.

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