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Anyone actually Working the Steps?

A place for rebooters to meet and discuss 12-Step programs in conjunction with their reboot

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  1. Hi guys, was wondering who else is working the Steps. And if so who is interested in getting a group together in a Private Conversation here where we share and give / get support regarding the Steps. I mean work them, not talk about them.
     
    Discerning_Dubearte likes this.
  2. twistedshadows23

    twistedshadows23 Fapstronaut

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    I am, I'm not on this forum much though. Mostly get my support off of nofap. I could be down to do a step study kind of thing though.
     
    kammaSati likes this.
  3. twistedshadows23

    twistedshadows23 Fapstronaut

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    I could commit to getting on at a certain time every week or couple of days to talk about steps. Just lemme know if you wanna set up a time.
     
    kammaSati likes this.
  4. Hey, thanks for your reply and the offer. It's all highly appreciated. I attend meetings, on and offline, which are good yet I feel to get more involved in working the steps with someone rather than only sharing and getting current. I will PM you.
     
  5. twistedshadows23

    twistedshadows23 Fapstronaut

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    Yea sharing and getting current is not what it's all about. Steps are where we find happy joyous and free
     
    kammaSati likes this.
  6. jt850

    jt850 Fapstronaut

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    I'm still on the First one. My Group meetings have been shut down temporarily because of Qurantine. I'm DYING for meetings. I'm so down.
     
    kammaSati likes this.
  7. Hey, what about online meetings?
     
  8. jt850

    jt850 Fapstronaut

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    I haven’t found any. I’m really new to it all. My group is actually setting up a Google Hangout tonight to do a video chat which I think I’ll join.
     
  9. Here are two links you can check out.
    http://slaaonline.org/irc/ or https://stepchat.com/
     
  10. Minsc

    Minsc Fapstronaut

    I'm interested in joining.
     
    kammaSati likes this.
  11. Hi, thanks for your reply. I will PM you.
     
  12. yoitscisco

    yoitscisco Fapstronaut

    Did you ask is anyone working the steps? Yes I am. I am in Narcotics anonymous, so we have a step working guide. Now it mainly involves writing, which has been very beneficial to me, to get a good understanding of the steps, but the application in my life is another thing. I still find that when I write on them and share them with my sponsor it has helped me out, and I felt a spiritual connection. Right now I am writing on my six step. The real work is just identifying the defects and realizing that I have to go to God to remove them, the writing just helps that process. Its a lifelong process, though. Really in order to stay clean and sober, we pretty much have to start applying the principles of all twelve steps to our lives pretty quickly. It is slower to formally work the steps in NA, but I have already started making financial amends. And I have meditated before, and sought out my Higher Powers will. I talk with addicts all the time and do service work, that's the twelfth step there. And God forbid if I would have waited until I was formally on my sixth step to work on my character defects, and ask God to help me there. Even though I am in NA, I always look back to the Big Book to put things into perspective. The steps used to be done very quickly, and there wasn't necessarily a sponsor, or meetings for that matter, in the very early days. So I just know the main thing is to be of service somehow, and continue turning my will and my life over, and for me that means working the steps, formally, and in my day to day life.
     
    Johnthesavage and kammaSati like this.
  13. Sounds like you are well on track, that's awesome. I am, too. Currently on Step 4 ... and have a sponsor. My question here was more to reach out to other twelve steppers in order to discuss literature, discuss steps, discuss questions out of the step work ... sort of work together on a regular basis, write to each other.
     
  14. yoitscisco

    yoitscisco Fapstronaut

    I see. I would be down. I am in NA but I also enjoy AA, and also SA, but the meetings aren't as prevalent.
     
  15. Yes, applying the principles ... I see that more and more, too. I’m a bit stuck in step4. How did you go about it?
     
  16. yoitscisco

    yoitscisco Fapstronaut

    https://na.org/admin/include/spaw2/uploads/pdf/litfiles/us_english/IP/EN3110.pdf
    Here is our working step four worksheet. I just worked it out of here, the step-working guide was really thorough, but I noticed it didn't ask what our parts of our resentments were. I thought the fourth step would make me be rid of all my resentments, and I wanted that because they said that resentments are the number one offender for relapse. It didn't get rid of them immediately, because it turns out that resentments are a character defect. And more will pop up, even if I get rid of old ones. That's why we use step ten, as a daily maintenance step, to identify our resentments and other defects, before they get out of hand. So I was very thorough in my resentments, which is the first section, and realized that I essentially had something against everyone, because I was very judgmental, prideful and self-righteous. I didn't speak these thoughts but I felt them. I also just got everything off my chest, including fantasizing about under-age girls, and shameful sexual things I did with my girlfriends. I believe addressing those things has really started me on my recovery from porn. I also had sexual abuse from my sister as a child. I can't say I'm cured, but I did what was suggested, and got it all out. The urge to lust is still hanging over me, but I don't even like it, and it's unsatisying. I am worried about having sex in real life more now, but I pray for God to keep me safe from that, because my picker is broken and I am sensitive and if I get broken up with or cheated on or mistreated by a girl,I could relapse on drugs. That's a painful area for me. Anyway it is good to just address all those shameful things we have done, because they are over with, and we're moving forward in life. Here's the Daily Reflection from AA: May 12th https://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/daily-reflection
     
    kammaSati likes this.
  17. Thank you so much @yoitscisco, that is really helpful and insightful. I can relate a lot to what you say ... having something against everyone, being judgmental, prideful, self-righteous ...
    Besides resentment I feel a lot of yearning and melancholy for a past I did not have. That is still nagging and keeping me on the hook. Trying to find something through acting out. I will read the paper you sent on step 4 and the daily reflections. Really grateful for this, thank you.
     
  18. I’ve found that I work the steps actively when I am living them.
    For example, using them when I experience an urge or character defect. I can understand the unmanageability it causes my life then work the steps on that issue

    I’m currently in NA and also Sa, so I have worked through the steps a few times with sponsors. I have worked through the fourth step 3 times so far, each time helping me grow closer to others and gain self awareness.

    https://www.na.org/admin/include/spaw2/uploads/pdf/litfiles/us_english/IP/EN3109.pdf This is a ip Na has for a daily inventory, I’ve found it helpful to use
     
    Last edited: Jun 27, 2020
    kammaSati likes this.

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