Fapping when not turned on

I can mostly relate, so I wouldn't blame the shit you be watching. For me, I have the compulsion to play with my penis whenever I'm anxious, stressed, or just have my hands free. And when my willpower is weak(like 70% of the time), I gradually end up entering into a full on fap sesh, but this builds up is slow and for the first 30-40 min, I might not even be turned on or hard at all. But I say i can "mostly" relate, because by the time I full on fap, I am definitely turned on and hard. At that point, I almost always turn to porn to help finish.

But I guess our main problem is similar, our compulsion to start fapping is out of habit and our brain's craving for an easy burst of dopamine. For me, my triggers have less to do perversion and more to do with my years of excessive PMO habits. Tbh, its super frustrating because I feel that its harder to distract myself when my trigger is a feeling instead of a thought. (To be specific, the compulsive feeling starts in the area where my bladder should be. Idk if its the same for you)

 

We go back to this behavior out of sheer habit. It's like chewing your fingernails or something. I've done this before many times. "Oh, it's 11:00, time to masturbate." I start from a state of not being horny, then I watch porn in order to induce arousal, then I jerk off. It's messed up.

 

I haven't even been getting turned on when I relapse. I just start and eventually I get a boner.

 

Yeah man, back when I was so much into it, I used to do like 4 times some days. I used to fap when I feel sad, happy, angry, stressed out and also fap when I am not turned on or have like 0 urges. I used to do it, as if it were like daily routine, It felt I shouldn't miss it, I should just get on with and be over with, as if it was like an insulin injection for a diabetic. Thinking back, I really feel messed up, like how I was damaging my brain and body for no apparent reason.