loser in life

Sorry to here that. What is it that’s holding you back?

 

It can really suck man. I'm depressed even now being alone and never having had a girlfriend, despite doing a lot of things right (worked hard in school, not overweight, got a decent job). It is definitely not a good place to be. I'm going on anti-depressants today in fact. You might want to see a therapist if you're really struggling

 

I am here for you brother. Text me immediately.
"Everything is gonna be alright..."

 

Small goals, one at a time. Achieving each one of them will give you confidence to go after another.
Two years and a half ago i was so low, i had health issues, low self esteem, lose a lot of weight, i was in the bones, a girl that i really liked dump me because i acted so needy. The worst time of my life.
But i came back one goal at a time. First, health, then weight, then diet, excercise and now NoFap. i feel that i'm in the best moment of my last 10 years. It all came with great effort and not giving up.
You can do it!

 

I feel your pain since I was close to rock-bottom myself only 3-4 years ago and know how low, painful, miserable and hopeless it all felt. But, I slowly found my way out of if but the journey wasn't easy and required me changing my habits one at a time, one day at a time.
Real and life-transforming change takes time, effort, belief (in yourself) and perseverance but it is possible and you have to start where you currently stand and slowly move yourself up, one step at a time. Soon enough, you will feel that you get a little more momentum for each step you take and before you know it, you start to feel much better about yourself and where you're heading.

So, the best advice I can give (if you truly want to get out of it) is start adopting good habits in your life, one at a time, so you get out of the worst depression-mode to begin with. Then, as time progresses, you start feeling that each little change goes easier and easier because you will gain confidence along the way.
If I could start turning my life around at age 28-29, after crashing mentally (and needless to say, 14-15 years of PMO-use), so can you but you got to have some determination and start taking some action ASAP because the sooner you take action, the easier and smoother will the transition be.

 

Bullying can wreck a man's self esteem. I'm sorry it happened to you. Maybe therapy can help. I go to therapy but it's just an outlet. I too was bullied most of my life, and yeah it messes up with the self esteem badly.

 

I know what your getting at, been there done that but in the real world dating also cost MONEY with no sure thing.

Ouch sounds just like my school years or as i call them my hell years and people ask me now why i dont want to go to my highschool reunion

felt that way to for YEARS
My advice is i have had everthing you said happen to me . You have to find a way to win daily EVERY DAY you dont give up YOU WIN every day your still above ground and your heart is ticking is a big FUCK YOU to the people who bullied you . Also i have seen some of the women who rejected me in school and in past a few times in the last years . I can tell you this i feel blessed because they look like shit fat nasty multple marriges and kids with diffrent dudes i am glad i never touched that. STAY STRONG

 

Brother...All I would like to say is that my health got completely screwed in the past year. I thought my life was shit but now I'll gladly take that life back if I get my health back. Nothing is lost as long as your health is alright, trust me you can do it. The fact that you were born simply means you were the fastest sperm out of a million , so you are a winner already. Just give yourself a chance, I believe in you.

 

I'm sorry you were bullied. I had some of that, mostly just ridicule. I tried in school a long time ago to flip that around, when I was very young I tried to bully others and in middle and high school I got self right eous tried to show up the bullies to make them pay for doing the wrong thing, basically never did Jack. For a long time it was very painful, so I'm sorry you had the experience you did.

It's ok to feel sad and angry. And it's definitely ok to work for minimum wage. There is a wormhole between shame and pride. On the surface some of what you wrote sounds like shame but it sounds like what is keeping you unhappy is unquestioned beliefs: you should have a higher paying job, your job has to do with you as a person and your worth, you have to do something that lasts in order to matter. I can't know, that just how it seems to me. And it could just be projection because I know those are all thoughts I often have and unconsciously believe and then suffer with
But if we notice them we can inquire into them, I use Byron Katie's method. Another helpful source talks about states, if you can get up out of negative states even past pride you will get to a stat of willingness and you might find yourself taking all sorts of actions hardly thinking about them at all that lead to very different life circumstances, but more importantly happiness on the way. That's really what it's about, loneliness is I need people in order to be happy, desire is I need stuff and sex to be happy, etc etc but like Katie says we can just skip the middle man

 

Hi I've been like you working minimal wage jobs and I studied hard got into IT and now I'm middle class I guess. Yes being able to pay the bulls and even having moneybleft over is great as opposed to not having to BUT I'm still fucking depressed,dread going to work and am just as bad as women as I was before. No woman still in my life and It kills me to think about it. Sometimes I wanna legit die to stop the pain. Everyone is giving advice here that it's not a big deal work on your self etc. It is a fucking big deal when your whole life has not been normal and you cannot properly communicate and bond with women. You just ca not make the gap of simply attracting a woman. It al.ost seems impossible. So just leaving this here. If you wanna improve your economic situation you can definitely do so - just save up for an IT certificate - Linux+,Vmware,CCNA just to name a few which are hot and the technologies are hot. Then you go frontdesk or to assosiate role immedeatly and work yourself up the ladder. Then you get a good paying jobs with corporate bullsjit, backstabbers and ashiles and you get paid well. But finding a woman... although I cannot give you advice hiw to do so I can assure you that it is going to be JUST AS HARD

 

dont feel alone , me too im 26 and almost never had a real girlfriend.

dont do something you dont like. me i was workin at a job but i found that working as an employee sucks because you have to deal with coworkers and such and usually its the same thing , they dont realy talk to you and you feel like the only point of working is to get money .

me i want to have my own business , i dont know if its possible but id prefer to succeed by myself than to rely on other people

 

You have to stop pitying yourself man. Have no pity with yourself, but also in most situations not with anyone. Life is unfair and complaining about that just doesn't help. Kick yourself in your ass and kick everyone else in the ass who doesn't respect you. Set yourself a goal and work hard with no mercy for yourself until you've reached it. And then celebrate your victory and be proud of yourself!
If you think your life sucks, it is because there are things you just don't know about life yet and you're most likely doing the same things wrong over and over again. So you have to find out what those things are.
Start reading biographies from great people and books about success. One after another and you will start to understand what I mean.