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Hi, 21 y/o newbie here

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Maeve, Apr 26, 2020.

  1. Saurav04

    Saurav04 Fapstronaut

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    Thank you. One of the reason for self hatred I found is people don't want to talk about it. If I am in group of 4 to 5 people and talk about what they feel about PMO or their experience about it people will feel awkward. Those same people could be seeing porn all day long alone in their own time (I checked my friend's browser history so I know) but they don't want to fight it. Once I talked about PMO to my ex gf, like did she masturbate or see porn. She didn't want to talk about it. It's weird like we can be so personal but when I ask about PMO why they feel awkward? After so many years I succeed in abstaining for it for more than a month. Now I know I failed hundreds of time that was my training to understand how this behavior can be so strong that it can become addiction. Now I can go no pmo hardmode and will never go back to PMO again. Hope all of you can recover.
     
    Maeve likes this.
  2. Day Sunshine

    Day Sunshine Fapstronaut

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    Welcome aboard friend! Success in your journey!
     
    Maeve likes this.
  3. Maeve

    Maeve Fapstronaut

    I'm happy that you've found the willpower to overcome your addiction.
    Hope I can do the same.
    I think people feel a lot of embarrassment when being asked about porn and masturbation because it's an intensely private thing for most and it can also be tied to a lot of social/cultural judgement. Men are shamed by women (mostly) for watching porn. Some women who watch porn would never admit it cause they don't want to be perceived as slutty or dirty. It's generally thought of as a low value activity that only sex-crazed men engage in. It's against the teachings of some religions. If you and your community believe what you're doing is morally wrong, chances are you're not going to want to talk to people about it. I think not wanting to talk about PMO is more a symptom of self hatred/shame/embarrassment than a reason for it. Though I can see what you mean - keeping things to yourself and bottling up feelings just makes the situation worse.
    In an ideal world they'd be no stigma around talking about this kind of thing.
     
  4. Maeve likes this.
  5. Congrats on reaching 5 weeks. That is so awesome. You should be proud of yourself, because i am proud of u. I reached 40 days last week before relapsing.

    Trust me sister you are in such a good position right now. Please, and i beg you don't make the same mistake i did. This isn't satisfying at all. Even whilst i was watching porn and in the moment of ejaculation, i wasn't content. So basically i pmod and derived no satisfaction whilst doing it, and was left with nothing but guilt, remorse and depression afterwards. You will feel horrible man, it is not worth it.

    I will be following up on your journal. All the best :)
     
    Maeve and unslaver like this.
  6. Maeve

    Maeve Fapstronaut

    Thank you :)
    I will try my best not to slip up.
    Haven't had any desire to PMO lately so it's been pretty easy.
    40 days is something to be proud of too, if you can do it once you can definitely do it again and go even further.
     
    Sig Sauer XL likes this.
  7. This is the similar case here.. I can see you are fighting hard! I wish you all the best :)
     
    Maeve likes this.
  8. tonyk1982

    tonyk1982 Fapstronaut

    Good luck on your nofap journey. You are young so it is good you are making positive choices now that will serve you well for the rest of your life. I wasted 30+ years addicted to PMO and just this June I faced up to it.
     

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