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[90-CHALLENGE] THE NINETY DAYS CHALLENGE !

Discussion in 'Events & Challenges' started by 2525, Oct 27, 2017.

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  1. Black jack

    Black jack Fapstronaut

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    guys i completed 20 days its been a roller coaster journey for me starting week was good of this streak but as i progress to 2nd week things were different urges were hitting me hard as i sleep late at night and this evil rises at night only at night i face the most difficult times to face these urges but i faced and i fight with it and i changed my sleeping time now and the journey is little bit easy now for me as i wake up early now sometimes i sleep late but not regularly like before today i am feeling extremely happy and my confidence is now much higher than ever well i know the journey to 90 days is still long for me but in these 20 days i am feeling like i have changed a lot if i maintain it to 90 days then i will be reborn my sin will be washed and it will be easy to control yourself after 90 days
     
  2. Merry Terry

    Merry Terry Fapstronaut

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    Day 9.
    I joined this forum 213 days ago. Of those 213 days, I was 191 days without M’ing to P.
     
  3. Merry Terry

    Merry Terry Fapstronaut

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    It is pretty weird, if you think about it, to watch pixels representing humans having sex :emoji_smile:
     
  4. vamshi2009

    vamshi2009 Fapstronaut

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  5. georgebou7

    georgebou7 Fapstronaut

    60
    396
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    Day 26

    Despite I am extremely pissed of from some incidents relative to exams etc, I manage to remain devoted to my streak.

    Good luck guys!! Stay strong!!
     
  6. bromor

    bromor Fapstronaut

    876
    6,446
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    Day 53 No M
    Day 158 No P

    Hi guys! Awesome video for today! We have all felt like the victims in order to get to this situation that we are getting out of now! Don't allow yourself to be a victim of yourself, your actions or anyone or anything else for that matter! Stay strong!

     
  7. 19/90. I had a dream I relapsed last night and was so relieved when I woke up realizing it was just a dream. Stay strong!
     
  8. Starting over. Day 0.
     
    Deleted Account, Pone, bromor and 9 others like this.
  9. Robsoon

    Robsoon Fapstronaut

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    Day no. 2 - "For the righteous one may fall seven times, and he will get up again,
    But the wicked will be made to stumble by calamity" (Proverbs 24:16)

    What counts in the end is, not how many times we fall, but how many times we get up again.
     
    Deleted Account, Pone, bromor and 9 others like this.
  10. hellofriend86

    hellofriend86 Fapstronaut

    94
    695
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    Deleted Account, Pone, bromor and 8 others like this.
  11. koslov

    koslov Fapstronaut

    344
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    16/90
    I continue the challenge. I thought for a short time about P yesterday but I didn't count on M at all!
     
    Deleted Account, Pone, bromor and 7 others like this.
  12. Timothy_James

    Timothy_James Fapstronaut

    384
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    0/90

    Hey guys, I had a relapse last night. I found some erotic story content (in text form) and masturbated twice, back-to-back. I count that as a solid relapse.

    I could definitely use some encouragement today. It's hard to not feel the sting of losing a 51-day streak. I will choose to see my success here (51 days without any P or M!). If I were to stay at this level, I could go a whole year and only hit PMO about 7 times. That's actually really good! Still, I am fighting with some shame and some damage to my ego. Writing on here is already helping.

    I'm working on replaying the game tape to see where I went wrong. As I look back I see this was one of those relapses that built up over the course of several days (more like a week, actually). By two days ago I could really tell something was off, and at some point yesterday I crossed that threshold where I lose complete sight of why I don't want porn in my life. I'm going to write out some of the things I see that went wrong and see if it brings any clarity:
    1. I noticed that I started being too lenient with myself when it came to compromising my goals for the sake of comfort. I am currently working through a Dopamine Detox because I believe all these things are connected. These compromises started with things totally unrelated to porn, like TV, video games, and coffee. I specifically noticed my mind giving me that old lie of "You deserve some comfort right now" to excuse choosing those habits. The truth? Well, I DO deserve comfort, but that doesn't mean I should break my commitments, it means I should find better and healthier ways to comfort myself that aren't connected to my addictive behaviors.
    2. One of the biggest ones there is COFFEE (and caffeine). I was getting off track with this and then this week it got really bad. This is sort of a sub point of the point I made above, but it's a really significant one. I notice that coffee is a very powerful stimulant for me, and it can really upset my chemical balance in my brain. I notice it having effects similar to porn, especially lack of motivation. Over time it also makes my BODY feel very uncomfortable because my sleep quality declines. This discomfort often drives me to choose more "quick-fix" comforts and makes me more vulnerable to porn. I have a plan in place today for dealing with that.
    3. I lost sight of my goal, the dopamine detox, and got loose with my PLAN. I started getting greedy by changing things too fast, starting new habits, not giving myself enough time to adjust. I lost sight of the vision I had earlier of the man I want to be. That's what was strongly motivating me at the earlier stages of my streak and making it almost EASY to keep myself from porn.
    4. I had some very difficult and significant emotional situations this week that I didn't really work through on any deep level. I didn't journal or talk them through with anyone. That's a big problem! Leaving that stuff un-addressed was probably one of the major factors driving me to make all those compromises. Perhaps adopting a system of self-check-ins each day and using healthy outlets like journaling and talking with friends with regularity would help me here.
    5. I have some major life direction/decisions I think I've been avoiding. Things have really been shifting quite a bit for me in many areas. This process of dopamine detox has ignited a reinventing of myself, seeing myself in a new light and significantly changing what I value in life. This has far-reaching implications and I think I haven't quite worked how it affects some big picture things in my life, like my job and my marriage. Not having clarity on who I am in those contexts is a great source of mental stress for me.
    Any thoughts you guys have would be welcome. Thanks for listening and thanks for being part of this journey with me. I'm incredibly thankful to have this place to come to after relapsing to help get back on track.
     
  13. Moktok

    Moktok Fapstronaut

    14
    67
    13
    Day 4: No MO
    Day 2: No PMO
     
    Deleted Account, Pone, bromor and 6 others like this.
  14. Srisurya

    Srisurya Fapstronaut

    999
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    Day 16 going on and feeling low.
     
  15. Maythe4thbewithyou

    Maythe4thbewithyou Fapstronaut

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    Hey man,
    Sad to hear that you relapsed. But I really admire you for even having a 52 days streak! The effort you must have made to even get there is already immense and definitely worth being proud of. You were weak for one day but strong for 52 days! Focus on your achievements nit your failures.

    From my experience it's much easier to just change one habit at a time instead of having to focus on multiple hard decisions every day. For me no PMO is my #1 priority and diet, learning portuguese, sport and other stuff comes way back.

    And it really helps to give yourself some slack once in a while. For me thats having a cheat day at the weekends when I can finally eat cake with ice and cream as an award for sticking to my diet.

    You already achieved the 1 week milestone and the 1 month milestone. You will reach the 90 days soon enough!
     
  16. HarveySpectre1998

    HarveySpectre1998 Fapstronaut

    26
    145
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    I thought i am keeping it under control now, but i was only in denial. So here i am!
    Day 0.
     
  17. Timothy_James

    Timothy_James Fapstronaut

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    Thank you friend!! Definitely agree, too many hard decisions each day is overwhelming. Cheat days are also a great idea! Thanks for your thoughts and encouragement.
     
  18. Merry Terry

    Merry Terry Fapstronaut

    778
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    Hey @Timothy_James, I'm with you. Just had a 45 minute session of looking at sexy scenes in old movies on Youtube. For me, it was a combination of having low energy, a depressed girlfriend, worry about world news, stressed about work, etc., etc. - all lame excuses for me making a shitty decision to distract myself from reality.

    I'm gonna have to go back to 0 as well. I've been trying since November now, and to tell the truth, I've been trying since 2014 to quit this habit, but I'm not managing. I get a little better, but that's not enough.

    I'm at a low point as well and a bit of at a loss on what to do, because it feels I have tried every technique but my addiction is just stronger every time. I know I'll get out of this at some point, but right now I don't know when or how.
     
  19. Merry Terry

    Merry Terry Fapstronaut

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    Rereading @Timothy_James' post, I realized that my real cause for my relapse - and a lot of them in the past - was not having a good way to deal with my emotions, especially when I feel like I'm not capable of solving my problems, of facing the world, where everything feels overwhelming and I'm not up to the task of dealing with the situation. These are very often the moments where I want to grab my phone, grab my dick, numb myself. Building an array of techniques to keep myself from doing that is good, and I should continue doing that, but I should also face that feeling and analyse it.

    So, back on the saddle and expanding/adjusting my list of focuses for the next 3 months:

    - Do research on healthy ways to deal with the emotions of being overwhelmed, helplessness.
    - Be kind to myself and give myself a break to acknowledge my feelings when I need to - don't suppress them or tell myself I shouldn't have these feelings.
    - Keep writing every urge and my response to it in my Urges Journal and in that way researching the underlying emotions and ways of responding positively.
    - Keep taking breaks every hour and force myself to do so especially when it feels like I can't or shouldn't.

    Still, I'm so fucking depressed and I hate myself so much for putting myself in this situation again and again and again. So any additional advice or encouragement is welcome.
     

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