[90-CHALLENGE] THE NINETY DAYS CHALLENGE !

33/90

 

@testwarz Congrats!!! Awesome job! See you there in 70 days.

20/90. 3 weeks tomorrow! Take care everyone!

 

Congrats man! So awesome! You're an inspiration to us all!

 

Congrats @testwarz !!! Keep strong for the following goals!! Self improvement journey never ends.

There were nice conversations lately. For the negativity a simple solution is to remember constantly that all people have problems and all people try to find happiness. You have to exercise this thought. The life is a "social theater". If someone doesnt express his fears, negative thoughts or whatever doesnt mean he is absolutely happy or perfect. He simply chooses this because maybe it helps him to continue in his life. It isn't nice to think that you dont have what you want because you are ugly, antisocial or generally a victim. it seems somehow self-centered too and doesnt seem generally to be the solution in our problems. This thought doesnt help you.

Treat yourself the way you would treat to your best friend. That's the secret.
Would you have a friend for example ugly or stressed? Of course, you love your friends exactly like they are. This way you have to love yourself.

Day 27. I had an nocturnal emmision but really I dont remember what I was dreaming hahaha.

(p.s. excuse me for my probably false in english)

 

Day 35!
@testwarz amazing achievement! Looking forward to join you at the 90 day summit!

 

No, but the appearance of such negative emotions is very regular. It usually starts on the 7th day, constantly harassing my brain until it collapses again, so I have to be very vigilant

 

Day 44 got up without headache and run for 30 mins. Feel great. Keep going!

 

3 days PMO
5 days MO
Damn... I want to watch porn so bad.

 

Day 40 good news it’s my birthday
Bad news had my first wet dream throughout this streak and I hated it

 

@My Best self Happy birthday bro . 40 days is an impressive streak.

 

I like the social theater idea. IA friend used to say that we constantly compare our insides to other peoples outsides. Thanks for the reminder of that.

 

Checking in on another day. I have a daughter who will soon be 8. She used to stay with me 2-3 days per week before this (in my opinion) overblown reaction to a virus hit but now I've only seen her once for 3 hours since April 1. This has been the hardest part internally in the last couple months. I'll see her today and Sunday. Her mom is finally loosening up. Having her has totally changed me as a person, or rather has brought out many of the best parts of me that were there all along. Doing this challenge will bring things out in me too if I stick with it thru all the temptations and discomfort. I've often thought how I would try to explain if my daughter while playing with my I pad came upon some porn I hadn't erased. Shes still in that wonderful innocent phase of life . I need to keep in mind that other people can be badly hurt by my bad habits and addictions. All my actions can have some affect on others. I want my affect to be a good one. One day at a time.

 

Wow! Proud of you!

 

Day 29/90. Still feeling good and I'm glad I've been able to think so clearly. Still trying to do the basics: exercise, eat healthy, get enough sleep, and socialize when I can. Have had a lot on my mind but this forum always helps me with that

 

You hit the nail right on the head AGAIN my friend! Your language is harsh in exactly the right way. Something very important that is coming to my mind recently is that withholding the good we CAN give to the world is far more damaging than the mistakes we make when we screw up.

It's a total asshole move if we have all this power and beauty in us and we choose to hide and deprive the world of it because of our insecurities and fears.

Man, that is very convicting and hard to hear. But more importantly, it bears the ring of truth....and that's what really matters.

 

Thank you so much for this encouragement and for standing with us as brothers in this struggle. I really can't express to you in words how meaningful and valuable your words of support are to me right now.

I AM familiar with Mark Queppet on Youtube and I LOVE his videos! In fact, watching his Man of Action series is what inspired me to start that 52 day streak I had going. He delivers SO much good information with such powerful perspective. I've watched quite a few of his videos on Youtube.

I haven't tried his Reforged Man course, but I will certainly look into it. Thanks for the advice!

 

Happy Birthday,bro!!
May happiness, peace and nofap follow u!!
I had wet dream at day 30 & 40 and it's natural .so it's not a bad news.

 

This is interesting. Thanks for challenging my perspective here and I think you bring up a good point!

Perhaps I should amend my statement to "I deserve good things." Perhaps redefining my rewards away from "comfort" towards things that are much more VALUABLE would really help. I love the idea of thinking of doing push ups when I "need comfort"! It's like, instead of choosing something easy that makes me feel comfortable, I'm choosing something difficult the accomplishing of which is a reward by itself because it brought value to my life and strengthened me as a person.

Friend that is profound!! Thank you for opening up that line of thinking to me.

 

12/90

 

These words are so kind! Thank you for saying that. It makes me feel so good to know that my posts have been impactful to others on here. One thing I'm beginning to focus on is how powerful I am to make positive impact and change in others lives. It can come simply and easily by posting a thought, an encouragement, or a lesson learned. This might sound crazy, but my whole life I've hardly ever thought of myself as a person who brings value to the lives of others. My definition of what true value is was so skewed and narrow that I missed all the ways I was being valuable just naturally. So, thank you for being my fan!

I also agree with you that it's important to be gentle and easy on ourselves while we pull away from porn. It's so difficult and we can easily become overwhelmed. I do believe that was part of what led to my relapse this week. I got careless and took on too much.

With caffeine specifically it's a little tricky, because having too much of it can actually strongly contribute to relapses for me (which is also what happened this week). Because of that, I still have to approach it with some level of intentionality. For me, overuse of caffeine quickly leads to lack of sleep, loss of energy, loss of willpower, and generally feeling very physically uncomfortable. This puts me in a much tougher place to resist urges. It also (for me) reinforces that comfort-seeking, instant fix, feel better solution mentality that (again, for me) is strongly related to porn use.

So, while I do need some healthy parameters on it in order to support my no PMO goal, I am also giving myself plenty of space and time to work that out of my life because (as you said) it IS a lesser issue. Thanks for your thoughts!