Teddy Bear - 120 days - some serious Challenges

Just to maintain the habit of posting every 30 days into the success stories section, to keep myself motivated being abstinent.

The so called superpowers are undisputable and I won't mention them here, there are dozens of threads about those.

Just some reflections on some challenges/struggles, I would like to share, so other fapstronauts can benefit from that experiences:

1) Rejection: I don't know, wether I just have some natural disadvantages with girls or what it is, but despite a subjective feeling of behaving less needy, more confident and more attractive towards girls, I still got rejections and didn't have any real sex successes in my 120 days journey. That doesn't matter to me, because I realized, that with nofap you are faster, more creative and more flexible in finding "solutions" how to deal with rejection emotionally. Still every time, you gain a lot of confidence through nofap, I got over-optimistic and after a rejection, serious self-doubt and doubt in nofap will occur, which will make it hard to believe in the benefits of abstinence and make it hard to keep up the abstinence. I will just observe it for a longer time, because nofap taught me, that the positive results often don't come immediately, but stepwise in longterm.
My advice is to commit radically to experience any negative emotions, instead of avoiding them (for example by alcohol or drugs), because going bravely through negative emotions is a shortcut for the brain to use that painful experience to calculate some powerful "solutions" unconsciously for the next time. If you're avoiding bad feelings, you will have them the next time over and over again without progressing, without emotionally maturing over the years.

(Still some of the rejections can feel devastating, because you think: "I already have 120 days, how can it be possible that I still get rejected at all?????") Even in times of regular fapping I had more sex (but with unattractive or mentally disordered women). Because of nofap I became more picky and more focused on getting into a real relationship with a person I really like, having the courage to make the move on those women, instead of going the easy way and hitting on fat or old women.

2) Exams: The pre-exam time period is very dangerous for the abstinence, because the pure stress is very hard to handle, since you haven't learned it in the previous decades, how to release stress without Pmo. Still my experiences from the last semester taught me, that enduring a couple of weeks under high exam stress situation can pay off in different ways, but you have to hold on to nofap for a subjectively ridiculous length of time, until it pays off. This is hard to deal with, because it probably only teaches you to organize yourself better for the future semesters, but in this case nofap can't do for you much in the present (at least it doesn't feel that way). Strict discipline is adviced, to reduce the harm of the results of being lazy in the last months. I probably should never resort again to "binge-studying" in the future, because that only makes sense combined with Pmo or at least a high consumption of tobacco.

 

Yeah it was similar with me in my former posts, for example 30, 45 or 60 days. Because in the beginning you feel so overmotivated (and you need that over-motivation to defeat your urges), so it's kind of a placebo effect, like you interpret every neutral thing as an attraction signal from women. But after kind of 100 days you "matured" a little and start to see and accept things as they are instead of being hyped up in some superpower illusions. In my opinion, this still IS a superpower compared to your state before nofap. But it has nothing to do with "superpowers" from a puberty testosterone fantasy, more a superpower of a grown man dealing with reality.