This is a fucking struggle, damn

Im new to, i understand not holding myself accountable... its easier than being responsible. I think we just absolutely have to be able to put these thoughts out there, i literally feel a little better getting it off my chest. And we need to be honest with ourselves and eachother.

Like i said, im a newby to, so no veteran advice. But ive been lurkin on the forum for a bit and can see quite a few on here that have really good advice.
Just dont give up on yourself

 

Make sure you are implementing new healthy habits, have a daily routine, have a plan for dealing with intense urges, and write down all your reasons to quit on a piece of paper that you look at everyday. These things are helping me.

 

Never been on there, this is my first day literally on any forum of this type. And i can't stop seeing so many similarites with everybodies issues and mine that its giving me hope and helping me open up. Ive downloaded a blocker app, you can block any websites, might help, just block that reddit (and anything else that might trigger). That way your habit cant hijack you in that way.

 

Its been a long time for me too.

 

I'd recommend being around people as much as you can because as soon as I'm alone in my room, I'm searching up porn online

 

Yeah its a struggle. For me it helps me fall asleep as well. I always wake up the next day feeling ashamed and shitty too. I'd say maybe leave your phone or whatever at the other side of the room but how tf does anyone manage to do that?!

 

Hey man. That's normal because porn in just a click away. I highly suggest you install porn blockers. They will make it harder for you to access porn. Those ones saved my ass a lot of times: https://forum.nofap.com/index.php?t...ower-an-aid-easy-streaks.272658/#post-2490733

 

Ya distraction should be your main weapon, keep motivation and stuff for a last moment resort.

 

First of all, try to understand why you feel the urge for PMO. Look at it from the outside. Interrogate yourself, be 100% honest. No judgments, no criticism, just pure and simple exploration. It's important to ask yourself the correct (in terms of effectiveness) questions.

Here's an example: you mentioned multiple times that it's harder for you to resist during the night. Then, a potential good starting point might be: "Why do I feel like I need PMO during the night more than the day? What makes it so different from the day? Which aspects of this particular time of the day pushes me more into the urge?". These questions might follow an answer like: "I need PMO during the night because it's the only moment in which I feel free." (I am speculating, only you can know the right answer). Then again: "So why do I feel free only during the night?" And so on and so forth.

This might take a while and might not be easy at all. But don't give up. You need to really listen to yourself in order to find the right answers. It takes effort, but it's incredibly helpful - to both facing PMO and getting to know yourself better.

You are the detective, PMO is the crime scene.

The point is: the clearer you have the reason why you are falling into PMO, the easier (or less harder) it is to prevent the mechanism. Because once you have understood the real reason behind PMO, you can ask yourself: "So what would be a better alternative to achieve the same result?".

From my humble experience, this:

is exactly the kind of mindset I am talking about.

And this:

is a great way to face this journey: in a proactive way. Getting rid of PMO from your daily life is good, but you need to replace that space with something else, or even better, with something new that makes sense for you. Prepare a plan, a real and tangible one, and stick with it. Put things in perspective: how is your life going to look like in 5 years if you haven't get rid of PMO? How is it going to look like if you did instead?

 

So it's definitely worth for you to keep digging into these feelings. I can understand you, I have been struggling with feelings of inadequacy and overthinking for all my life too. Then I did a year of psychotherapy and I started focusing completely on knowing myself for real. Now I am a changed man, not at 100% yet but I keep working on it everyday. It's been a heck of a journey. I would like to suggest you some of the things that seriously made the difference for me, in a positive way:

This book: 12 Rules for life which, for me, has been a blessing.
This YouTube channel: The school of life

Obviously the psychotherapy is the one that helped the most, unfortunately it's pretty expensive, but if you have the chance and you never tried it, take it in consideration.

You are here, so you already did the step to recognize your problem - the first step towards a better life.

Be kind with yourself. Always!

 

Yeah, it also helps me fall asleep, but i believe as the days go by mt body will adjust, as I struggled with sleeping initially