To the Community and Old Friends

Doing some reflecting on my time here and through my journey I have to say, I find myself missing a lot of folks that used to hang around here in all parts of the forum.

This isn't a dis to the already great members here or the new folks, but over a year ago there was something magical about this place when people like @Moon Shot, @spaces, @Millenial, @Kenzi, and @CrushPornBeneathYourFeet were here.

While I'm not really around myself these days and I understand why folks leave or don't come back, I still think about those conversations, the laughs, how much fun everyone was having, and how all these people come together to create something beautiful on a recovery site.

I'll never forget my time here, and while it's pretty quiet compared to before, it's the brilliant and nurturing people like @What I Do That Defines Me, @Strawberries, @Beamer, @TheOneRingBoromir, @MuscularSherlockHolmes, @White Sheep, and @kropo82 that continue to make this place what it is today.

Seeing my old mates go made me realise how important the community is, and without the guidance, dedication, compassion and wisdom of the hardworking/longtime folks here, this place wouldn't be what it is today. So thank you everyone for being there not only me, but also the folks that need advice or a good cheering up.

I wouldn't be here if it weren't for this forum, it's people, and the constant morale behind my recovery. Just know you're all important, and no matter who you are or where you're from I'm sure you're helping someone in one way or another, and making a big difference in somebody's life.

I don't know if I could ever give back especially in the ways you all have, but know you're appreciated and as a way of thanks to everyone I thought I would make this post.

 

Thank you! You made me smile on a tough day.

I know how much it hurts to see the people disappear in the distance with time. But as long as we are here, we might as well carry the torch and continue spreading the message that they all did for us.

That's my way of thinking and coping with the loss of such good friends.

(I stay because maybe somewhere, inside, I am hoping I will meet them again.)

 

Hyperbole? I don't think so. I've been battling severe depression and anxiety since I was a child, and it was compounded by doing PMO at least once everyday. I was constantly crying wishing my pain would end, and each time I gave in I felt like dying.

I honestly don't know what I would have done, as the only thing that kept me going (especially during 2016) was my partner, and my time on here. I never want to experience those feelings again.

 

I still have depression but I'm glad it's more manageable now. PMO addiction certainly isn't something to take lightly or joke about, you can spiral into a dark place pretty quickly and it becomes harder and harder to break the cycle. Hopefully you're either recovered or are getting there!

 

Hey, thanks for the ahout out, i appreciate it. I know what you mean about that time and about lost friends. There was something strangely magical about that time that will probably never quite be repeated. But as you say, there is still a lot of good here and some great new people. I'm glad you've stuck around all this time even if you're on a bit less and even though you've pretty much got a handle on recovery (which is great!)

 

Aye, old and new there's certainly fantastic folks here through out the forum. I guess maybe I reminisce too much and lean heavily into nostalgia, since how much time was spent here during my recovery it was certainly one of the biggest parts of my life.

I'm not perfect and even now I sometimes feel as though I could slip back into old ways, as the urge and "need" to binge has come on quite strong during these stressful months. I owe it to you folks though, your determination, jokes, banter, and words of encouragement pushed me further and further which has led me to this point of recovery.