I really don’t seem to understand myself

Top Five Ways to Transmute your sexual energy
1. Exercise
2. Creativity (writing, blogging, singing, etc)
3. Socializing
4. Meditation/Breathwork
5. Qigong

Maybe incorporating other activities such as the ones listed will help you in addressing your urges.

 

Exercise should help your urges! But nothing in life is ever so simple. Some thoughts:

If you’re killing yourself in the gym, sprinting for miles, or doing anything else really hard, you’re consuming will power. I’m not an expert, but a lot of people suggest that you have limited will power, and you need to decide what you spend it on.

Try finding a form of exercise that energizes you, distracts your mind, and makes you feel better when you’re done. Exercise can be incredibly therapeutic and assist with urge control, but it’s like any other tool, you gotta use it right.

I also think that you could reframe your thoughts around urges. To do so, step back and just think about what you’re feeling. Sit there and really think about it. Are you arms tingling? Does your stomach hurt? Are you sad, mad, or happy? Figure out what an urge is for you.

Then ask yourself, what if I just let this feeling go? Will it hurt you? Most likely it will fade in a few minutes and cause you no pain. Just because we have an urge doesn’t mean we need to do something about it.

This then leads me to advise that maybe you want to pay less attention to your urges. It’s the feeling of your brain rewiring itself. I know it’s incredibly difficult, but if you can do it just once, you can replicate that behavior. It WILL catapult your recovery forward.

Enough of my rant! If you want to talk more, PM me.

 

It has to do with post-O effects. For me, post-O makes me feel lethargic, tired, depressed, out of energy, lazy, and just not wanting to do anything at all except sleep. When I work out very hard, I already drain myself out completely. My body aches and I feel like just resting the entire day. The last thing I want to do is to make that exhaustion worse by using PMO. I know the after effects very well so there is literally nothing enticing about PMO for me after a good, hard workout since it only exacerbates my physical fatigue. PMO does not relax me as some people claim it does to them. Maybe I wouldn't see PMO as being bad if it actually did relax me....