10 year's freedom from pmo - my Catholic method

You could write here about your plan and its realisation. I could give you some proven tips.

 

Good luck with your struggle. I understand why you are reluctant to promises ( your bad experience with breaking it, maybe them). Of course it's much better to make no promises than to break them, and I'll be waiting untill you become convinced that clever well thought promises can be very useful in fighting this sin.

 

Recently I've found that one of the dreams (visions) of St. John Bosco is in agreement with 'my method' of getting rid of pmo or much better said the dream proves that 'my' method is a traditional Catholic one.

Please, read first this most terrifying dream depicting the ways to hell (especially the pmo way called there 'impurity' or '6th Commandement'

' The road to hell' by St. J. Bosco:

http://www.todayscatholicworld.com/bosco_hell.htm

After you've read this I invite you to my commentaries on some passages of the dream (vision) comming from my 7 year's experience in fighting this addiction which prove the necessity of faith, repentance, prayer as only effective means to get rid of pmo.

 

My commentaries on 'The road to hell' by St. J. Bosco

They were first posted to a member of the Catholic forum but I mean that it concerns all of us (not only Catholics but everyone fighting this plague.


'' I kept tugging, and after a long while a huge, hideous monster emerged, clutching a rope to which all those traps were tied together.... It won't do to match my strength with his, I said to myself. I'll certainly lose. I'd better fight him with the Sign of the Cross and with short invocations.''

C. (my commentary) - Look what did here St. J. Bosco- he admitted that he has not enough strength to fight the monster ( that pmo monster in our case) and he begann with short invocations (short prayers) and the Sign of the Cross. When we pray God works with His power in us and only God is able to defeat the monster not we alone ( and our efforts)

''fully examining many of the traps, I saw that each bore an inscription: Pride, Disobedience, Envy, Sixth Commandment, .. and so on. .... Looking even more closely, I spotted knives among the traps. A providential hand had put them there for cutting oneself free. The bigger ones, symbolizing meditation, were for use against the trap of pride; others, not quite as big, symbolized spiritual reading well made. There were also two swords representing devotion to the Blessed Sacrament, especially through frequent Holy Communion, and to the Blessed Virgin. There was also a hammer symbolizing confession, and other knives signifying devotion to Saint Joseph, to Saint Aloysius, and to other Saints. By these means quite a few boys were able to free themselves or evade capture.''

C. You'll find in the passage above some types of means to rescue us from pmo:
meditation (meditative prayer), spiritual reading (reading the Bible or Catholic books), Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament (staying in the presence of God before the Blessed Sacrament - in the presence of mind that God is there), frequent Holy Communion (during Mass), prayer to Mary (Blessed Virgin) at the time of temptation, Confession (look this is called hammer for 'pmo addiction') , prayer to Saint Joseph, to Saint Aloysius or to other saints. Look in all the means we ask for the help and rescue from God, we don't fight with our own strength which is nothing compared to satans strength and the strength of our addiction.

''Then is there no way to save these unfortunate lads? Please, tell me what I can do for them. -They have superiors; let them obey them. They have rules; let them observe them. They have the sacraments; let them receive them."

C. So in order to quit this addiction we must obey our church (what the teaching of Catholic faith says - Cathechism), obey the Bible and we must receive the Sacraments - Confession, Holy Communion during Mass.

''They have been warned a thousand times, but they still choose to rush into the fire because they do not detest sin and are loath to forsake it. Furthermore, they despise and reject God's incessant, merciful invitations to do penance.''

C. So we must do penance and this means that we must every day come back to God trying to pray, read the Bible, trying to do what God says we should do...

''Always preach against immodesty. ... Bear in mind that even if you did admonish them individually, they would promise, but not always in earnest. For a firm resolution, one needs God's grace which will not be denied to your boys if they pray. ... On your part, pray and make sacrifices''

C. In the passage above you can see that a firm resolution to fight pmo is not enough because without God's grace we won't have enough determination , will and power to keep our resolution not to do pmo every day. This power we get from God but only when we pray - especially at the time of temptation to do pmo. and make sacrifices means our daily efforts to live according to the Gospel.

"Exactly! Disobedience is the root of all evil."

C. So the root of pmo is disobedience too. Disobiedence to what God in His word and the church say. In order to get rid of pmo we must try to be obiedent every day but without prayer and confession (when we are in deadly (grave) sins it's impossible. We won't have enough strength and desire to be obiedent.


''Others go to church, but, ignoring recommendations, they misbehave; instead of praying, they daydream or cause a disturbance. There are also those who make themselves comfortable so as to doze off during church services, and those who only make believe they are going to church. Woe to those who neglect prayer! He who does not pray dooms himself to perdition.''

C. This passage shows why so many believers are still addicted even if they regularly go to church, even if they pray - it's because they actually don't pray (are not in the presence of God) they daydream during prayer and Mass - so they in fact neglect prayer. We must learn how to pray well so that every prayer every Mass must be our meeting with God but not a time when we are distracted and think about our past, future, about our problems, desires, funny things ... etc. we must make every prayer our pesonal meeting with God, if not then such a defective prayer won't help us. We will stop God from working in us.

"Keep telling them that by obeying God, the Church, their parents, and their superiors, even in little things, they will be saved."

C. We aren't children any longer so to be saved from pmo and all other miseries we must be obiedent to God and Church in its teaching.

''We know that Our Lord always portrayed Hell in symbols because, had He described it as it really is, we would not have understood Him. No mortal can comprehend these things. The Lord knows them and He reveals them to whomever He wills.''

C. So the all description of the hell is only a symbol but it's enough to know that there will be very unpleasant, much pain and that it will be everlasting.

''What a torture to think that they couId have been saved so easily , yet now are irredeemably lost, and to remember the many good resolutions made and never kept''

C. Look at this passage - to be saved is not difficult - it's really easy. To get rid of pmo is not difficult either - this is my own experience since 2013 - if we do it with God realising what St. John Bosco described in his dream.
We must pray - it's not possible that we keep good resolutions ( for example good resolutions of not doing pmo) without praying enough because we are too weak to keep them, only God can give us the power (grace) to keep them.

C. And I'll add that to be saved from pmo is easy too provided we pray (especially at the time of temptation), live without grave sins and when we commit them then we must go to confession as soon as possible, provided we receive Holy Communion, go to Mass, read the Bible.... all in all when we try to meet God every day...

C. I can prove this with my life experience - it's not imagination or wishful thinking or theory - it's true and it's working well (God works in us).

C. It's enough to try to live a good Catholic (Christian) life, to try honestly to live according to Gospel to be set free from every evil, sin and addiction.

 

I' m glad. If you have questions for clarification or some details then ask them. You could write on the thread your impressions in this method. It would be interesting and I think that it could help some addicts. I'll start praying for you.

 

I invite you to try together as a little group. The previous post written by Sefs 33 - we are in touch now and I'm sharing my 7 year experience on this way - with many detail and Sefs 33 can always ask any question or simply we are talking on many topics - most of them concerning faith, pmo addiction but also our personal lives. We could talk about our fears, difficulties, victories, progress, plans , painful past...etc. We are becoming friends. If you want to join our little group of sharers then write here or PM me.

This invitation is always open to anybody who reads the thread and wants to join us. To anybody who wishes to try the method. I'm free from pmo, do you want to be free too? The only condition is a desire (even a little one at the beginning) to come back to God and to change one's life according to God's word. The rest you'll get to know in the group. We could call it a mutual support and prayer group.

 

Yesterday I watched a sermon at a retreat on how to get out from an enslavement, addiction. This was delivered by an exorcist, fr Wojciech Drab to a group of recovering addicts.
Listening what he was saying I discovered that he talked about a very similar method I have been using for almost 7 years successfully.
What he said is:

1. We should avoid any confrontation with our mind, thoughts, past memories, future plans etc. - that is we can't enter the whole mind process alone and try to find a solution. The mechanism of entering in confrontation, talking to our thoughts is the same as in case of Eve whose mistake was to get in talk with the snake (the result is always a fall).

2. This engaging in this confrontations causes that we experience fear, sadness,emptiness, concerns, worries etc. (bad feeling and thoughts) and soon we can't endure this state of heart and we look for some relief to medicate ourselves and relax.We can't free oneselves from the bad effects of the confrontation on our own. It's like in the fairy tale 'Baron Minhausen' who being in the swamp on his horse, he pulled on his own hair and drew himself and the horse out of the bog (you know it's not doable alone).

3. When in the miserable state we most often choose between 6 behaviours or ways out: glutony, alcohol, drugs, sex (we are here - pmo), violence, massive internet surfing or video games (I think the list can be longer).
(in such a way we enter pmo or another addictions.

4. We can't enter the confrontation at the beginning. We must escape in the montains - Jesus never said to His disciples that they should fight, He ordered them to run away to the mountains when Jerusalem would be attacked (by Roman soldiers). God is above in heaven so the moutains are a symbol of prayer.

So any time when we feel that the confrontation beginns we must run away to Jesus (prayer). Only with Him (God with us) we can be victorious over our addiction. Jesus said ''Watch and pray so that you will not enter temptation''.
We must do it each time. Watching means that we can't forget the mechanism of confrontation which leads to our fall. We can't destroy the mechanism alone even if we are aware of its working and results.

The mechanism was created during the first fall - the original sin. Since that time we people have thought that we can live separated independent of God and automaticly - that we are able to kick the habit alone with our will power and efforts plus knowledge how to do it (but it's impossible to break the mechanismin such a way)

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Below I translated some longer excerpts of the sermon by fr Wojciech Drab. It'll benefite you enormously if you read it and start using what you have read:

''
We have to experience the consequences of your chaos - like the villain on the cross, well, the other villain (didn't do anything) - what will happen as you continue to take matters into your own hands - you will experience all the chaos you produce.
Jesus taught his disciples to flee (when the army would besiege Jerusalem) and this is the essence of our struggle. Eve allowed herself to be drawn into a confrontation, talking, discussion with an evil spirit.
In fact, you already lose when you get into a confrontation with what comes to your mind, what goes on in your head, with our thoughts, feelings, what your imagination tells you, memory, what someone tells you, with what you hear on TV, with what happens to you, with events, with information that comes from outside, what happens today because someone told you something.
Or you had to do something that you didn't want to do, something that wasn't what I wanted, or it didn't work out, or they changed something.
(It's) when you put the words of the beast satan in front of your eyes, they always lead you into trubble (when you confront what is in your head, or what comes from outside).


The mechanism that was left in us after the original sin, that we automatically go into confrontation when something is not convenient, pleasant. As I succumb to this mechanism of confrontation, then I am more and more devastated, irritated, discouraged, everything is against me and everyone is my enemy, everything is heavy, tedious, unbearable, little by little you get to a state where everything will be bad, and you need to relieve yourself, ....finally I deserve something . . . and then six things appear: eating (gluttony), drinking (alcohol). . . here maybe I can find an escape from this sickening, unbearable reality.

Jesus is trying to lead us out of this pernicious mechanism - what is good is that which brings us pleasure, quick satisfaction . . . and I haven't tried that yet, that, because if I don't try that, I will be at a loss (loss of that pleasure), because I can't imagine how I could not taste some form of pleasure, for me it must be pleasant, tasty, light.
We are accustomed to hearing - that is bad what does not give us quick pleasure - this mechanism is a trap for us from the very morning when we have to get up at the sound of the alarm clock and go to work, and then it just escalates, a person gets angry, and they tell us to do something, and I would rather not do it . . . and finally the evening comes and I deserve something - eating (gluttony), drinking (alcohol) , drugs, sex , violence, massive internet surfing (or video games) . .


The point is that we should slowly stop listening to what our emotions, passions tell us. . . Jesus shows the remedy, the remedy is in asceticism, to destroy in ourselves those tendencies to fly after every taste .... to deny ourselves a taste, some pleasure - but this wise asceticism is not really the most important thing, because in the end the most important thing - Jesus talks about is - ''Watch and pray at all times'', at every moment, so that you can avoid , flight upwards.
And this is the best medicine that Jesus shows. That's why I became God with you, because I know you can't handle this on your own. We ourselves will not get out of these mechanisms, even if we perceive them, understand them . . . mechanisms that provoke me to confront, to give myself a reward, to reach for all tastes, passions . . .Jesus talks about powerlessness and the ability to escape confrontation, to acknowledge my powerlessness, that I can't, to admit to myself that I can't. . . .

and it says that every time you see in yourself such mechanisms coming up, immediately go to prayer, because I am God with you for this. As soon as you see something coming that wants to provoke you into a confrontation, call on Me right away. As soon as you see that these disastrous mechanisms for self-gratification come to you, call Me . . . and this is your strength . . .

and paradoxically it turns out that our strength is the awareness of our own weakness because as long as we feel strong, this mechanism draws us into the fight, and in this fight we always die, always, at one hundred percent, and the awareness of weakness will make me instead of fighting, start running upwards, for help - in those particular moments when it happens to you, when those mechanisms come up, in those particular moments when those traps appear. . .

And do not fall asleep, do not lose sight of the truth that I am Emmanuel (God with you) And take advantage of the fact that I am with you, every time your weakness comes up, when those mechanisms come up, which always defeat you. Your strength is not in you, it is in Me.
So call on Him strong whenever there comes forward what overcomes you. Learn to cry out and it will make you strong. So that we would have the strength not to get into a confrontation. Learn to call out (to God), not to debate with this mechanism. ''

pdwsz

 

If you or anybody else reading this post above has any questions to clear the details regarding practical use of the tips then write it here or PM me.
It's because I hate so much pmo ( on the other hand there is another dark side of me telling that pmo is the most exciting pleasure - but I know at the same time it's a deadly poison) which took away my 33 years and hardly can stand what this sh*t makes of lives of so many here. And the solution is so simple and so Catholic.

 

Hi,

It seems the description of fr John Bosco doesn't apply to you so much because you try to fight this drifting of thoughts. The fault is to allow drifting intentionally or out of negligence, laziness. I personally treat what happens during Mass or prayer as a form of fighting. That is - I intentionally don't agree with any distracting thought (daydreaming) and if I get aware that my mind began dreaming or started planning what I would do after Mass, prayer or started imagining something ..etc. I as soon as possible break up the chain of distracting thoughts by forcing my mind to be aware of the presence of Jesus or force my mind to be aware of words (their meaning) said by the priest or answers said (their meaning) by the believers or activelly listen to readings from the Bible (their meaning and the fact that they are said by Holy Spirit or Jesus Himself)
or during private prayer I try to focuse all my attention on the presence of God and on the words I say to Him. I use sometimes a lot of energy to do so .... but after such a prayer, Mass I feel my mind, emotions and will changed. I feel often healed. I focus on the presence of God, His words and He heals me and changes my will to accept His will.
I personally think that it's very difficult to feel healed from a temptation, depressive thoughts, anger, irritation etc. if I don't direct my attention (out of laziness and comfort feeling) on God enough. The decisive element is my desire to do so independent of being tired, bored (bad emotion) or exciting thoughts, ideas etc.

So you try to do what you can and even pray when don't hear. What about a hearing aid? This could solve your problem or maybe taking the place nearest the priest?

It's normal - I have the same problems - this is a consequence of the original sin but it becomes damaging our prayer when we allow daydreaming , give consent to it or what is the worst when we find some pleasure in the daydreaming.

This is the real problem. Mechanically said words are not a contact with Jesus. What heals or better said Who heals is Jesus during prayer but we must touch Him by faith and what faith is it in mechanical words?
It's as if you said some magic words and the set of words could help you. But words are only means of communication with God. It can be that during temptation you have no contact with God because you maybe focuse on some words or on your emotions, inner pain, tempting thoughts, unclean imaginations ....etc but not on the presence of God. Being aware of the presence of God is the real prayer, not the words because we can say words but our attention, thoughts can be anywhere but not on the Person we are trying to communicate with. For example - adoration of the Blessed Sacrament - it's enough to be aware that Jesus is in the Host without saying a word. I repeat then the word Jesus to focuse my running mind on the Host.
Prayer are not words but meeting with God.
Mechanically said words are meeting with what? with nothing or a meeting with our emotion, plans , irritation (a meeting with ourselves but not with God - fr Blachnicki said that any time we start thinking during prayer about our inner pain, plans, ...etc. then the prayer finished untill the time when we anew start thinking about God, His presence - which is the most important).
This is the field you could and should work. Read someting about how to pray good, watch someting on youtube - a tutorial how to pray, what's the most important, what are typical mistakes.... We should learn praying all our life. If you don't better your prayer this way I am on will be futile for you because personal prayer is absolutely the basis in this method.

Yes, a good book about how to pray - ask your priest, confessor. If you were a Pole I could recommend you something very good but I assume you can't speak Polish . The best are saints - how they describe their prayer. Ask your priest he should know.

But look below my next post is about prayer - from the Cathechism (I chose what I find important)

 

How to pray? - we can find it in the Catechism of the Catholic Church

PART FOUR: CHRISTIAN PRAYER

I. Vocal prayer
2700 ... By words, mental or vocal, our prayer takes flesh. Yet it is most important that the heart should be present to him to whom we are speaking in prayer: "Whether or not our prayer is heard depends not on the number of words, but on the fervor of our souls.
2702 ...We must pray with our whole being to give all power possible to our supplication.
2704...Prayer is internalized to the extent that we become aware of him "to whom we speak;" Thus vocal prayer becomes an initial form of contemplative prayer.
2709 What is contemplative prayer? ...In this inner prayer we can still meditate, but our attention is fixed on the Lord himself.
2710 .... the heart is the place of this quest and encounter, in poverty and in faith.
2711....we "gather up:" the heart ...awaken our faith in order to enter into the presence of him who awaits us. We let our masks fall and turn our hearts back to the Lord who loves us, so as to hand ourselves over to him as an offering to be purified and transformed.
2715 Contemplation is a gaze of faith, fixed on Jesus. "I look at him and he looks at me": this is what a certain peasant of Ars used to say to his holy cure about his prayer before the tabernacle. This focus on Jesus is a renunciation of self. ...
2716 Contemplative prayer is hearing the Word of God. Far from being passive, such attentiveness is the obedience of faith, the unconditional acceptance of a servant
2721 The Christian tradition comprises three major expressions of the life of prayer: vocal prayer, meditation, and contemplative prayer. They have in common the recollection of the heart.

Article 2

THE BATTLE OF PRAYER

2725 Prayer is both a gift of grace and a determined response on our part. It always presupposes effort. the great figures of prayer of the Old Covenant before Christ, as well as the Mother of God, the saints, and he himself, all teach us this: prayer is a battle. Against whom? Against ourselves and against the wiles of the tempter who does all he can to turn man away from prayer, away from union with God. We pray as we live, because we live as we pray. If we do not want to act habitually according to the Spirit of Christ, neither can we pray habitually in his name. the "spiritual battle" of the Christian's new life is inseparable from the battle of prayer.

I. Objections to Prayer
2726 In the battle of prayer, we must face in ourselves and around us erroneous notions of prayer. Some people view prayer as a simple psychological activity, others as an effort of concentration to reach a mental void. Still others reduce prayer to ritual words and postures. Many Christians unconsciously regard prayer as an occupation that is incompatible with all the other things they have to do: they "don't have the time."


2728 Finally, our battle has to confront what we experience as failure in prayer: discouragement during periods of dryness; sadness that, because we have "great possessions," we have not given all to the Lord; disappointment over not being heard according to our own will; wounded pride, stiffened by the indignity that is ours as sinners; our resistance to the idea that prayer is a free and unmerited gift; and so forth. the conclusion is always the same: what good does it do to pray? To overcome these obstacles, we must battle to gain humility, trust, and perseverance.


Facing difficulties in prayer

2729 The habitual difficulty in prayer is distraction. It can affect words and their meaning in vocal prayer; it can concern, more profoundly, him to whom we are praying, in vocal prayer (liturgical or personal), meditation, and contemplative prayer. To set about hunting down distractions would be to fall into their trap, when all that is necessary is to turn back to our heart: for a distraction reveals to us what we are attached to, and this humble awareness before the Lord should awaken our preferential love for him and lead us resolutely to offer him our heart to be purified. Therein lies the battle, the choice of which master to serve.


2730 In positive terms, the battle against the possessive and dominating self requires vigilance, sobriety of heart. When Jesus insists on vigilance, he always relates it to himself, ....


2731 Another difficulty, especially for those who sincerely want to pray, is dryness. Dryness belongs to contemplative prayer when the heart is separated from God, with no taste for thoughts, memories, and feelings, even spiritual ones. This is the moment of sheer faith clinging faithfully to Jesus in his agony and in his tomb. "Unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if dies, it bears much fruit." If dryness is due to the lack of roots, because the word has fallen on rocky soil, the battle requires conversion.

Facing temptations in prayer

2732 The most common yet most hidden temptation is our lack of faith. It expresses itself less by declared incredulity than by our actual preferences. When we begin to pray, a thousand labors or cares thought to be urgent vie for priority; once again, it is the moment of truth for the heart: what is its real love? Sometimes we turn to the Lord as a last resort, but do we really believe he is? Sometimes we enlist the Lord as an ally, but our heart remains presumptuous. In each case, our lack of faith reveals that we do not yet share in the disposition of a humble heart:
"Apart from me, you can do nothing.


2733 Another temptation, to which presumption opens the gate, is acedia. the spiritual writers understand by this a form of depression due to lax ascetical practice, decreasing vigilance, carelessness of heart. "The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak." The greater the height, the harder the fall. Painful as discouragement is, it is the reverse of presumption. the humble are not surprised by their distress; it leads them to trust more, to hold fast in constancy.


2737 "You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions."


2739 ....Transformation of the praying heart is the first response to our petition.

2742 "Pray constantly . . . always ...For "we have not been commanded to work, to keep watch and to fast constantly, but it has been laid down that we are to pray without ceasing.


2743 ....It is possible to offer fervent prayer even while walking in public or strolling alone, or seated in your shop, . . . while buying or selling, . . . or even while cooking

2744 Prayer is a vital necessity. Proof from the contrary is no less convincing: if we do not allow the Spirit to lead us, we fall back into the slavery of sin. How can the Holy Spirit be our life if our heart is far from him?

Nothing is equal to prayer; for what is impossible it makes possible, what is difficult, easy.... For it is impossible, utterly impossible, for the man who prays eagerly and invokes God ceaselessly ever to sin

Those who pray are certainly saved; those who do not pray are certainly damned

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My comment to: 2744 Prayer is a vital necessity. ... if we do not allow the Spirit to lead us, we fall back into the slavery of sin

Slavery of which sin is on the forum? is it not pmo? So we could rephrase it:
- Prayer is a vital necessity. ... if we do not allow the Spirit to lead us, we fall back into the slavery of pmo

 

Hi everyone,

This Easter marks my seventh year of freedom from pmo. Christ set me free by the means of repentance (trying to honestly obey Him), prayer and some system of time limited promises to Him. It's enough to do so. The details how to do it are in my entries. Christ is risen, indeed, He is risen!!!