NOFAP 90-DAY SUCCESS STORY

Hey guys!





Before I start on giving my experience and advices, let me introduce myself and give a little backstory.





Excuse me If my writing skills are not up to par- I didn't really write much before joining NoFap.





I'm an 18 year old male. My personality lies somewhere between an ambivert and an introvert. I was very energetic and enthusiastic as a kid (a lot mischievous as well) - I was interested in playing outside always and didn't study as much. I was educated of "sex" by a close friend from school when I was somewhere in between 10-12 years of age. I was taught about (M) and (P) from the same friend maybe around the same time.



Ever since I was exposed to this vile I've been continuing it for roughly 4 years before actually noticing changes. During my pre O-level years, I noticed that I had gotten a bad social anxiety and lack of confidence and primarily a lack of interest in going outside. I never thought of these issues as being caused by the excessive use of (P) and (M). I continued engaging in the same habits thinking that the disinterest in going outside was "me being myself".



I have to tell you guys that during these years of (P) and (M) use, I was concerned about losing track of religion and stuff. And I would go maybe a month, 2 months free and once again fall back into the same habits. The intention that I used after a relapse was - "I'm never going to (M) and watch (P) ever again". And this quite didn't work. Overtime this was almost like a ritual - like I PMO, I say to myself I'm never going to do it again, PMO again, say to my self the same thing. This continued for too long.



After completing my O-levels I made an intention to never use (M) and (P) ever again because I needed a fresh start going into A-levels. (Mind you, during these times I never knew or believed that I was addicted to this habit - so I was a bit easy on myself.)



So a few months into a-levels and I failed badly. The first few months into a-levels was going pretty well and hence after relapsing I felt horrible and was starting to worry about my habit. After numerous tries (which with time I knew didn't work) I was depressed as hell. I feared that I will never be able to recover and that I'll be constantly telling myself "I'll never watch (P) or (M) hereafter" with no actual action. So, I was legit determined in quitting this addiction once and for all because I was pretty pissed about losing my grades and losing the opportunity to experience many other parts of my life that my family members was enjoying.



So, I first started watching some long videos to get some education around this addiction. For this purpose I watched videos from a YouTube channel called "Universal Man". This guy's videos gave me a deeper insight as to what (P) "actually" is and how it affects us in amazingly different ways. And I have to give him extreme credit. Thank you Mark Queppet.



I never really knew about NoFap until 4-5months ago. I thought NoFap was a special addiction recovery program that required hundreds of dollars to enter. Until around 4 months ago I actually discovered that it was a forum with people suffering from the same addiction and finding ways and striving to quit PMO once and for all. Now, just to let you guys know - I had a bit of an ego around my addiction. Meaning I was not willing to join a recovery forum because I was in the mentality of "I can quit whenever I want to".



After a little bit of education around (P) harms, I decided to join NoFap. After a little bit of reading, I decided to go for the 90-day reboot - PMO free. I was already 14-15 days PMO free by this time and was determined in quitting this filth forever. And yes, this time the determination worked! And I'm 90-days free! (Thanks to the community)



I achieved the 90-day mark in my very first attempt. It wasn't easy at all. It's not will power and cold showers alone that helped me achieve the 90-day reboot. It's mostly by "belief". What do I mean by belief? - Belief in NoFap and belief in the fakeness and dangers of PMO. Because if you are setting out for a 90-day reboot trust me, without belief both in yourself and the community and also the belief in the reality and harms of (P) you won't be able to achieve 90+ days - no discouragement, but just to let you guys know that solely depending on "will power" and "motivation" won't bring you success in leaving PMO behind permanently (according to my past experiences).






I have some advices and tips for those of you attempting the 90-day reboot to quit (P) and (M) for good.





[1] ADMIT IT.

This is the basic and the most important part you should work on. When I say admit it, put your ego, self status (all the - I can quit whenever I want stuff) aside and accept for what you've become.

Not putting aside my ego around this addiction is what kept me from seeking help or actively quitting.

This step alone is enough to get you started.


[2] MINDSET.

This goes along with the above advice. You've got to have a strong, changed mindset around PMO. You have to develop a repulsion against it. This is mainly done by educating yourself of this addiction (read YBOP)


[3] CONTEMPLATE.

Spend a lot of time thinking about what PMO has done to you, what are some beautiful events and moments of life that you have missed out on due to your PMO use, etc.

Once you've spent a good amount of time thinking and contemplating on your PMO use, write it down. Write it all down - you can't keep your reasons and thoughts on PMO in your brain for your entire reboot journey. Write down the following things if you need some guidance on what to write,

• Your NoFap resolution - what are you hoping to achieve and get rid of.
• Your personal reasons to quit PMO - can be religious, career issues, health problems, marital problems, etc. Contemplate on everything addressing what PMO has "actually" done to you apart of giving you the 5 second burst of dopamine.
• Your future with and without PMO [I personally didn't do this but just contemplated on it along the way, but I recommend you writing it and keeping up with it]
• Why should I quit PMO? (apart of the harms, side effects, etc) - This should be entirely on how PMO is affecting "you". Make your reasons as real as possible.

[4] INTENTION.

Keep the intention that once you complete the 90-day reboot, PMO is going out of your life and you're going to become the best version of yourself from then onwards. Keep this intention real.

If the above intention is too much, just keep the intention - "I'll be the best version of myself during the 90-day reboot challenge with no relapses". And once the 90-day is over you wouldn't want to fall into the depression pit after you've climbed out of it.


[5] COLD TURKEY

Go cold turkey. This is the way for successful recovery. No fantasizing, sexual thoughts, peek, erotica, etc. Simply no any sexual stuff. You need to abandoned that neural pathway. And it is easier this way. I have tried to quit (P) in the past but didn't go cold turkey - I read erotica, fantasized, sometimes peeked, etc. Quitting porn doesn't literally mean you get rid of porn and keep all others the same. No. Porn is connected to many other parts of your life and also to many other parts online. So, keep your heads up.


You might rationalize this by doing something called Porn Fishing. For a clear explanation, check this video out - Porn Fishing: What it is and how to stop doing it






THE ABOVE TIPS WERE INTENDED ON "BEGINNING YOUR JOURNEY". FOLLOWING ARE ON "HOW TO PERSIST".





[6] PLAN BEFOREHAND.


Just know that it is extremely difficult to think about long term goals, the consequences and all that stuff when you are having high urges (at least in my experience). The reason is that most rationalizations are made during these peak times. Your brain will do anything to rationalize a relapse. It'll whisper stuff like - it's just one time, most people do it, it's normal, etc. So it is extremely important to not give in - which is why it's best to distract yourself.

Just write down beforehand what you'll do when you get high urges - it'll save you a lot of stress. Just like a former PMO user said in YBOP: "The best time to deal with a bad urge is before it shows up."


[7] MAINTAIN A DIGITAL FOLDER

This folder has to contain all your PMO reboot stuff. For example, you can save videos, images, podcasts and any other media that might help you during the low motivation times like the FLATLINE.

When you find yourself forgetting about your "reboot process" or with low motivation, you can go back to your folder to remind yourself why you decided to quit in the first place.


[8] NO SOCIAL MEDIA

Quit Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and whatever the apps you use that will be a hindrance to your reboot.

Instagram is the worst. PLEASE LEAVE IT.

Do a Dopamine Detox from social media if you wish.


[9] EXERCISE

Exercise daily, consistently. Make it a habit. It'll make you feel energetic and less lethargic throughout the day.

If you're struggling to make it a habit, use a habit tracker until you've made exercising apart of your routine.

Start small always.


[10] NOFAP STREAK COUNTER

Use the nofap streak counter, just don't be obsessed with it - this will lead to frustration.

Follow this rule: Don't be overconfident if your streak is high, Don't be underconfident if your streak is low.

Just don't feel bad because other's streaks are higher and yours is lower. Feel motivated, not bad.

Streak is just for motivation. What really matters is "your mindset around PMO".


[11] SELF TALK

Write a self-talk journal daily.

Basically, self-talk is venting and addressing your emotions into a piece of paper. And finding a solution for your problems by responding using your rational mind. It's like your emotions wants something, but your rational mind knows that that's not what you "truly want" - and thereby your rational mind responds and gives a solution to your emotional mind.

For a full self-talk journal guide read the Reboot Regimen Guide by Mark Queppet. (I'll link the book at the end of this post)


[12] SCHEDULE YOUR DAY

Know what you're going to do to fill your days. Build a daily schedule and follow it. Don't let yourself be bored. During boredom, different thoughts wander your head and might cause you to relapse.

If you're a student like me, fill in your schedule with studies. During breaks don't stay with yourself much. Go out. Take a walk if you can. Do something - at least during the first 2 months. Because no matter how confident you feel, the nature of this addiction is that there will be rationalizations around PMO. This is because our past PMO experiences have been so deeply ingrained in our brains. And the goal is to weaken the neural pathways associated with those past experiences.


[13] ELIMINATE RELAPSES

This should be your goal - to not relapse. What happens each time you relapse is you're conditioning your brain to like and tolerate PMO even more. So it'll be even harder the next time.


[14] EXPECTATION

Lastly, but surely - don't expect the process of recovery to be easy. Please. It's going to be extremely difficult (at least for the first 2 months in my experience). So be ready for that. There are going to be brighter days where you feel like the king of the world (metaphorically speaking). But there also days where you won't feel like that. So don't let it take you by surprise. This is very important.

Just remember this (mentioned by a fellow fapstronaut) - Reboot is not linear. There are ups and downs along the way. But the withdrawal effects are definitely temporary. They might come and go. But the intensity reduces over time.


Have hope



SOME ADDITIONAL TIPS

• Try to start your NoFap journey in a day prior to an upcoming special day - it'll give you a boost. I set myself on this goal knowing that when I reach 90th day mark I'll be turning 18.
• Block images entirely. "Allow images" when it's absolutely necessary to view images. [Because there are lots of triggers in random articles]. - Chrome has an option for this.
• I recommend going PMO free for at least 10-15 days before addressing the issue. Why? Because you are already PMO free for a decent amount of days and it'll give you a boost to start your 90-day reboot with confidence. (your choice)
• Read a lot - books are your best friends during the reboot

So yeah, that's it.


Excuse me if there were any mistakes or flaws in my post. I may have not portrayed my entire story and that is partly because I wanted to keep the post as short and brief as possible. I focused mainly on giving advices, tools and tips that helped me in staying consistent during the 90days rather stressing on my experience and what not.


Reminder :- Please make YBOP the first priority when you set out for the 90-day reboot. Don't be in a hurry, take time - sink in all the truths of (P) and remove all your fake beliefs around (P). One by one


Good luck guys!! You'll reach the 90-day in no time (as long as you're occupied). Trust me - time flies.


Feel free to post any advice (I'd appreciate it) and ask any questions that you have. I'll do my best in answering them.



Thanks for reading






Sources that helped me on keeping up during the 90-day reboot.



BOOKS

Your Brain on Porn by Gary Wilson (this is a must for rebooters IMO).


The Easy Way to Stop Smoking - just replace the word "smoking" with "pmo" when reading.


SPAM REMOVED (spam code #001) - REPORT TO MODERATION SPAM REMOVED (spam code #001) - REPORT TO MODERATION (edit version of The Easy Way to Stop Smoking - they've replaced the word "smoking" with "pmo").


The reboot regimen by Mark Queppet

https://universalman.com/the-reboot-regimen/


Metascript method by Mark Queppet

https://universalman.com/metascript-method-download/




WEBSITES

https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/

https://pmoflatline.com/

Porn Addiction: The ultimate guide to quit porn.

https://fightthenewdrug.org/

PornHelp.org - Home

https://manvsfap.com

Recovery Nation - Recovery Workshop

 

One book that I wanted to recommend above has been subjected to a spam removal i think. Idk why. Anyways the book is - SPAM REMOVED (spam code #001) - REPORT TO MODERATION SPAM REMOVED (spam code #001) - REPORT TO MODERATION.

 

Thanks so much for your comment. Glad the post helped. I didn't want to post this initially, as I thought most advices and points were given already in former success story posts. But I also wanted to share what worked for me.

This community gave me hope. So it is my duty to give hope back to the community. Wish you the very best in overcoming this addiction

 

It's the edited version of Alan Carr's easy way to stop smoking. Nothing different. Better read the original one first.

 

Thanks for reading brother.

 

Welcome to nofap brother. You are in the path for greatness. Keep going.

 

Will power plays a significant role in the 90-day reboot. But it is only a part of it.

 

Thanks for agreeing pigwaran. Emotions do play a role in relapses. But we shouldn't let them. We have to find other ways to de-stress and to cope with emotions.
We have to face the emotion rather than escape. The more we escape, the harder it gets.

Every minute detail matters in recovery . It is said that a small inclination towards (P) is enough for the neural pathways to trigger.

 

When i feel bad or stressed, i write down a self talk - this works most of the time. If it didn't, i take the time off and distract myself with youtube which is really bad i know. Have to find a better strategy for dealing with emotions.

I don't actually associate pmo and emotions now. Emotions is just another thing. And i got to deal with it seperately.

 

Jogging or taking a walk is a good way to de-stress. Unfortunately for me there is no way i can go outside due to the covid-19 pandemic.