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Fetishes that don't involve sexual stimulation might not actually be good?

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by skaterdrew, Jul 18, 2020.

  1. skaterdrew

    skaterdrew Fapstronaut

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    I mean how many guys have fetishes and porn induced fetishes where the guy they're watching in the video isn't actually getting sexually pleasured by the women? When the things you're fantasising about your not even imagining your dicks getting any action?

    So one example could be a guy licking a woman's feet. So you might be masturbating to this and getting really turned on by it, but if you done it in real life you might not actually enjoy it that much. It's when your masturbating watching it or fantasising about it that is when it might be good.

    There is many fetishes where the guy isn't actually being sexually pleasured, and I am wondering if in reality a lot of guys might not actually like these things as much as they think. I am wondering if they only actually like these things when they are masturbating watching it or masturbating fantasising about it.

    Where as in reality if a guy got these sort of things from a woman in real life, getting no real sexual pleasure, I am just wondering how many guys would actually enjoy it.

    I have actually read about this, about guys that have eventually got certain fetishes carried out on them in real life, and they didn't actually like it. But they had been masturbating watching this fetish and masturbating fantasising about it for years.

    I just find this really strange. When your masturbating to these videos watching a guy get these things done to him by these women this is really turning you on, when you fantasise while masturbating imagining these women are doing these things to you this is really turning you on. But if you got these things done to you in real life by these women there is a good chance that you wouldn't even enjoy it.

    I think this is likely the case for a lot of these fetishes guys have today.
     
    Last edited: Jul 18, 2020
    Kilrunio and Deathsc0ut like this.
  2. Deathsc0ut

    Deathsc0ut Fapstronaut

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    I totally agree. I think most fetishes are not real fetishes.... they are just induced by porn use. Your brain gets used to the stimulus and when you masturbate to something different it does not set free as much hormones etc. Thats why we develop a fetish. Like... we do not enjoy fapping to something different and just go on masturbating to our PI-fetish. And we don't even know how it really is. When things get real, your brain also does not release as much hormones and so you won't get aroused. I've experienced the same... fapped to a certain thing but didn't get aroused by it in reallife....
     
  3. Prince6543

    Prince6543 Fapstronaut

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    For me foot fetish is not porn induced. So I do enjoy it. But only as long as this stays a secret between me and that girl. If my family and friends got to know about it, it's not fun anymore. I used to fantasize before Nofap that I would go to a metropolitan city, will date a girl, will cheat on her and will beg to her to not leave me and will say I will do anything for her. I will even give her advices to lock me in chastity so that I can't escape jer and live life as jer slave. This is just one. I made up hundreds of such ideas.
    I have also tried it in real life where I asked the girl to play games in which one wins and other loses and the loser have to dk whatever the winner wants which was obviously well executed to be something fokt related and i did enjoy that
     
  4. sam30

    sam30 Fapstronaut

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    i fantasize in foot fetish. which resulted in seeing a escort. need to get this out my head. I am on day 30 NoFap
     
    Deathsc0ut likes this.
  5. skaterdrew

    skaterdrew Fapstronaut

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    It sounds like you have a femdom fetish. These are actually the type of fetishes I am more meaning guys don't like in real life when they try them. But then again maybe some guys do still like them in real life when they try them. But I have read that many don't.
     
    Hardwork11 and sam30 like this.
  6. sam30

    sam30 Fapstronaut

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    I need to get my head round this. It doesn’t do me any good. Today is day 30 I am in so much urge. Think my brain is not receiving any dopamine
     
  7. I probably wouldn't enjoy being vored in a real life scenario. But who knows.
     
  8. sam30

    sam30 Fapstronaut

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    I am going to stAff my brain with so much urge of dopamine. Then I will say to myself you ain’t getting none
     
  9. skaterdrew

    skaterdrew Fapstronaut

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    I had to google what that is. That's really messed up man. Yeah I doubt you'd like that in real life.
     
  10. UnitedWeStand

    UnitedWeStand Fapstronaut

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    Not all fetishes are porn induced but you got a point. Sometimes fetishes are a result in previous experiences in life that generally have impact on someones psychology and turns out on some sexual fetishes. Im not a therapist but surely there were a lot of fetishes thousand years before pornography comes. Better see a therapist if your fetishes have negative impact on you.
     
  11. Yikes, sorry you had to see that. Hopefully you had safe search on.
     
  12. skaterdrew

    skaterdrew Fapstronaut

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    I can't see any images online except on sites I have chosen in advance. I just read about what it was on google.
     
    FellatiousD likes this.
  13. ssack32

    ssack32 Fapstronaut

    I have thought much of the same thing from time to time. It is interesting from a psychological perspective how one can be turned on by watching a certain act but not from actually doing it. Thinking back to some of the stuff I was watching during some of my darkest days, there's no chance I'd ever do it in real life. Definitely different on a screen.
     
  14. Prince6543

    Prince6543 Fapstronaut

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    Because humanity and guilt exists
     
  15. ssack32

    ssack32 Fapstronaut

    Very true. But then why would you feel guilty doing it but not watching it? It may have something to do with the way addiction in general desensitizes the mind to certain things.
     
  16. To be honest I'm not sure how this theory holds up, because I have been in situations where I have fantasized about having irl sex, but when I got in bed with a woman I was turned off. I don't think that there is necessarily a discrepancy between liking a fetish and wanting to do it IRL, but rather being more comfortable with PMO than IRL activities in general. Could be due to anxiety, could be something else but it's hard for us to say.
     
    +TenPercent likes this.
  17. skaterdrew

    skaterdrew Fapstronaut

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    I guess that is true. That maybe when your masturbating and fantasising about having sex with a particular woman is great. But sometimes when a guy gets with the woman it's not as good as the fantasy.

    But say for example you were masturbating and imagining a particular woman was giving you a blowjob. Then in real life you got a blow job from this woman. I think it is likely that this is going to be somewhat enjoyable. The same with sex, if you have sex in real life I think it is still going to be somewhat enjoyable. It should be amazing. But I think it is still going to be somewhat enjoyable at the very least.

    But there is a lot of fetishes that don't even involve the guy getting his dick pleasured.

    I mean there is a lot of weird fetishes in porn that guys are very aroused by and masturbate to. But what I am saying is in real life I bet a lot of the guys who like masturbating to a lot of this stuff in porn wouldn't actually like some of this stuff in real life.

    But I do feel like it's different if your getting your dick pleasured by the woman. It's more likely your going to like it if your getting your dick pleasured by the woman.

    For instance if a guy was getting turned on at watching another guy licking a woman's feet for example, is he just going to watch it and imagine he is doing that? Or is he going to be masturbating and imagining he's doing it? It's like the guy is only really enjoying the fantasy when he is masturbating at the same time. But when you see this stuff in porn, the guys are doing a lot of these fetishes and are not getting their dicks pleasured at all. Their dicks aren't being touched.

    This is more what I mean by the guys who masturbate to these sort of fetishes might not enjoy them as much in real life. They might not actually enjoy them as much when their not getting their dicks pleasured.
     
  18. Prince6543

    Prince6543 Fapstronaut

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    Because you can seek arousal from that video, but you can't see the emotional trauma those people are going through. Everything is edited to make it look perfect and fascinating. But the reality is completely different
     
  19. Prince6543

    Prince6543 Fapstronaut

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    You wired your brain to get aroused by that fantasizing, not sex. There is no one in this world who became a sex addict without having sex.
     
  20. There is probably a kernel of truth in this.
    Reality is very different from fantasy.

    My biggest fetish is cuckold and it revolves in part around not having sex with my partner. The fantasy is likely to look like a porn film, with the other guy being more masculine than me in every way. The reality is likely to be some stinky dude who looks nothing like a porn star.
    I've had women tell me that the best way for me to get over a cuckold fantasy is to have it happen. "Then you will assert your masculinity as you stand up against this outrage and you will never have this fantasy again".

    In practice, being "cheated on" has proven to be painful and uncomfortable when it first happens. But, with time, my addict mind eroticises what happens - perhaps as a way to turn a painful experience into something that I can at least get off on. :rolleyes:
     

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