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Angry and disappointed in myself. Double relapse.

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Belching_Booch, Aug 19, 2020.

  1. Aug 19, 2020 #1
    Belching_Booch

    Belching_Booch Fapstronaut

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    Been making lots of positive changes the past few weeks. Started lifting intensively again as I was pre covid, been going to the park every day to exercise outdoors and mediate in nature, started cold showers, been eating super clean, deactivated my Instagram, deleted ALL the porn and insta screenshots off my phone (thousands), and have been in an overall better mood. I'll be honest I haven't been able to get past five days in nofap, but as someone who used to fap 3-4 times A DAY, I think it's a major milestone nontheless. Today I felt especially down (won't say why, it's embarrassing and pathetic) and got super anxious to the point where I couldn't sit and relax. It's already night time and I already did two workouts today. My body is worn down, and I can't use exercise as a distraction... Tried another cold shower, didn't help. Ended up relapsing twice back to back. I'm mad and disappointed in myself. Why can't I go for more than a few days without this shit?? I swear quitting pot and tobacco was a JOKE in comparison to this...
     
    Belching_Booch, Aug 19, 2020
    Belching_Booch, Aug 19, 2020
    #1
  2. Aug 19, 2020 #2
    Shuffledude88

    Shuffledude88 Fapstronaut

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    My Journal
    Hey. Be proud of all progress you have done. Just keep building on it. Your failures doesn’t define you, it’s How you handle them which matters. Keep building that foundation and mindset, get back up when knocked down and it will take you long. Losers let’s their let downs hold them down, winners get back up again and takes the fight. You are a winner my friend.
     
    Shuffledude88, Aug 19, 2020
    Shuffledude88, Aug 19, 2020
    #2
  3. Aug 19, 2020 #3
    SoaringEagle

    SoaringEagle Fapstronaut

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    Keep trying, I can't even remember how many times I relapsed like this, but the important thing is that you are improving and reducing your frequency.
    Keep trying.
     
    SoaringEagle, Aug 19, 2020
    SoaringEagle, Aug 19, 2020
    #3
  4. Aug 19, 2020 #4
    CC1234

    CC1234 Fapstronaut

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    We've almost programmed our mind to dwell and focus on the negative side of things and bypass and overlook the positive side of things.

    Negative Part - Yes you relapsed but that is now in the past even if it was 5 mins ago its in the past so don't dwell on it. the more you dwell the more the negative side gains strength and energy and continues to make you feel stupid and sad about yourself.

    Positive - You need to understand that 1 day is a massive achievement for you especially if you normally go 3-4 times a day. thats a massive achievement and you should congratulate yourself for that and then use that to build up the positive side of you. Write on the page how you felt and why you felt this way, let others know how amazing you feel after one day and they you go from there.

    1 day at a time brother :)
     
    CC1234, Aug 19, 2020
    CC1234, Aug 19, 2020
    #4

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