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Accountability for All

Discussion in 'Events & Challenges' started by corylife, Dec 22, 2019.

  1. ThisSideThatSide

    ThisSideThatSide Fapstronaut

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    you wont get as may urges now ig, flatline will start in a few days, so urges wont be your major concern, filling up that void will be
     
    corylife likes this.
  2. hiddentaurus

    hiddentaurus Fapstronaut

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    First thing I'll say is, you need to remove yourself from any private location with a computer. Get to a living room with other people, or go outside your house and take a walk for at least 20 minutes. Strong urges usually tend to die down after that amount of time.

    Now, the trickiest time to avoid relapse is at night. Outside of all other measures you're taking, having a last minute fail-safe is a must imo, bro! On my most successful streak, doing a crazy amount of pushups when the urges get strong helped and it's what I plan to do this time around as well. Literally go until your arms get so tired, you don't have the energy to do anything but pass out in your bed or couch and go to sleep.

    You can also try jumping into the bathroom immediately and taking a cold shower. There are two benefits to this. First, cold showers help to relax your libido when you have strong urges. Second, both pushups and cold showers will train your brain to associate your bad habit with discomfort. I had a cousin who used to suck his thumb a lot. To break him out of the habit, his father took goat dung and wrapped it around the finger with a piece of tape. Each time he'd lift his hand to do his thing, the smell would gag him. Eventually, he overcame the habit. Extreme example but the logic is similar.

    You don't need to do these things every single time you have an urge, only for the times you know you're about to relapse. Train yourself to consistently punish yourself EACH AND EVERY TIME you almost give in. Overtime, my guess is that you'll be more and more able to have urges and not feel compelled to act on them.
     
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  3. strength_09

    strength_09 Fapstronaut

  4. hiddentaurus

    hiddentaurus Fapstronaut

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    So I am not seeing much engagement with this thread overall. Guys seem to check in pretty infrequently/sporadically. And it's only been a day but even OP hasn't checked in since I've been here.

    I'm trying to figure out what the most effective way to use this thread would be. Again, new guy here lol. Have any of you gents actually found accountability partners you regularly connect with on here? Or do you have notifications and/or bookmarks for this thread set up on your phone? Or a Discord group?

    Ideally, how is an accountability thread supposed to be used as a tool?
     
    corylife likes this.
  5. Prison Mike

    Prison Mike Fapstronaut

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    Hey everyone, checking in! I'm still going (with Hard Mode off). @the lostman/// congratulations!!! Keep it up!

    @corylife how are we doing my man?

    @hiddentaurus just a place to check in, track your progress, get some help. Once you're on a streak, you won't want to let us down by telling us about a relapse! (Although shit happens and we understand, and we'll help you through it.) Good luck!
     
    Last edited: Aug 24, 2020
    corylife and hiddentaurus like this.
  6. hiddentaurus

    hiddentaurus Fapstronaut

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    @Prison Mike For sure. And thanks man. Same to you! Let's get it!!!!!
     
    corylife likes this.
  7. strength_09

    strength_09 Fapstronaut

    day 25 +
    feel the POWER!!!!
    that's INCREDIBLE
     
  8. the lostman///

    the lostman/// Fapstronaut

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    congrats man keep the POWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRR jajajaja
     
    corylife likes this.
  9. the lostman///

    the lostman/// Fapstronaut

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    going trough day 11 ive also have a danger moment this afternoon but i hold it i think that the reason of why im been on this "almost relapse" situation its because yesterday and the day before it i couldnt make my exercise/meditation rutine properly but to day i did it and i havent feel any urges ( at least not big ones) so here i am day eleven,by the way i see that everybody its talking always about the flatline can you explain me what is that?, also wanna say hi to everyone @Prison Mike good to see you its been a while, im glad you still here keep the strong spirit man youre the boss
     
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  10. the lostman///

    the lostman/// Fapstronaut

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    im noticing that @corylife dont come here regularly this is normal for him?
     
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  11. hiddentaurus

    hiddentaurus Fapstronaut

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    Good job not giving in man!! Keep it up!

    To answer your question about the flatline, it is basically a stage of nofap which begins anywhere from a few weeks to a few months into your pmo recovery, where your libido pretty much hits rock bottom. In other words, you won't be able to get it up pretty much no matter what. Like nothing will arouse you at all. For example, you can see the most attractive woman in your life and you will feel nothing. And this can last up to a few months in the worst cases.

    For obvious reasons, this stage of recovery is of great concern to a lot of guys. It's basically the "I think my d*ck is broken." phase. Look up some videos or reading material on it when you get a chance so that if/when it hits, you at least know what to expect. It's not something you want to sneak up on you unexpectedly as flatlines sometimes lead to temporary depression and anxiety.

    Each person is different, so some may have longer flatlines than others but good thing is, eventually all flatlines will pass. And really they aren't physically harmful from what I gather. Basically just your brain re calibrating itself from the dopamine abuse we put it through with constant pmo.
     
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  12. corylife

    corylife Fapstronaut
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    back to day 1. feeling hopeless. Yea prison mike, i wasnt doing so great.
     
  13. hiddentaurus

    hiddentaurus Fapstronaut

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    Hey brother. Nice to meet you. First and foremost, I wanted to thank you for starting this thread. It's what I have to credit for my current streak, which isn't much yet but if you knew how much I've struggled in the past to get this far, you'd probably be proud lol.

    More importantly, we've ALL been there, brother. The most important thing is that you are still checking in with us and being honest about your count. Give yourself credit for having the strength not to run from your mistake. Remember the reason you started the thread, bro. Accountability. If I relapsed, you'd be telling me the same thing I'm saying here. It's all just speed-bumps on your path to glory brother. Keep. Moving. Forward.

    There's probably nothing I can say to relieve you from the disappointed feeling you have right now. And imo this is probably for the best. You now have an opportunity to objectively assess and re-evaluate your strategy. Relapsing doesn't make you a bad person. It just reveals that there's a hole somewhere in your strategy that simply needs to be patched. It's on you to make adjustments and/or commit to them once made

    My suggestion is, while it's still fresh, write down what triggered you on the day of relapse. If you're not sure, simply journal what you did during the day, be as thorough as possible, take a break and then come back and reread everything you wrote down. The answer may become apparent afterward. Was it a suggestive photo or movie? A female? Too much spare time with nothing better to do? Getting stuck in your head and overthinking until you were able to rationalize doing the wrong thing?

    If you are eventually able to narrow it down to one thing or several, highlight the trigger(s) and if signs of them begin to reappear in your current streak, take advantage of your new awareness and avoid them like the PLAGUE.

    Lastly, whatever you're feeling right now, give the emotion its time but then get up and move forward. Because whatever your streak was, those amount of days WILL come again. It's up to you to make the best of that fact and surpass your old self. And knowing you'll feel great when you do is something that should give you motivation today!

    YOU GOT THIS, MY MAN!!!
     
    Last edited: Aug 25, 2020
    corylife, Prison Mike and Boyish 123 like this.
  14. Boyish 123

    Boyish 123 Fapstronaut

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    Keep up the mentality that u will win this. I'm on day 54.
    Just couple of lucid dreams and 1 wet dream which is recently..We will win this
     
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  15. Prison Mike

    Prison Mike Fapstronaut

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    Very well said @hiddentaurus great advice. And as a few others have mentioned, being alone makes this tough. Cory, you been getting out at all? Stuck indoors? Or ..?
     
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  16. strength_09

    strength_09 Fapstronaut

  17. hiddentaurus

    hiddentaurus Fapstronaut

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  18. the lostman///

    the lostman/// Fapstronaut

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    thanks man for the advice an explanaition i do see weird that thas´s going to happen me in the other times ive tried NoFap this never happened ( also notice that the far ive always get was 10 or 15 days with luck) but i will keep it in mind, im going to investigate how long it last,but well i dont have a girlfriend by the moment so thats something that should not worry me a lot
     
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  19. the lostman///

    the lostman/// Fapstronaut

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    going through day 12, @corylife its thanks to you that i discover this amazing group and im making great advances so thanks for that man youre a hero and we are here to give you backup, really thins group its helping us a lot so thanks
     
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  20. ThisSideThatSide

    ThisSideThatSide Fapstronaut

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    i was having a very strong urge today evening. i was not edging or masturbating . but, precum got released (strangely enough, after my erection had gone away, this never has happened to me before. evn the amount was not small as it usually is, a little more than that, but not too much also).
    please tell me that i haven't relapsed, i didn't mean to do this. i am on day 24 or 25, idr, i really do not want to reset that counter.
    like, i wasn't even fapping.
     
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