A Few Hard Truths about Porn and Erectile Dysfunction

You will never change the mind of those of us who have seen the damage pmo has caused. 5 years my husband couldn’t get it up! We thought it was because he was older, does long distance road biking. He is great health. Only once he quit pmo ( 4-6 months clean) did his erections return. A year an a half later and he hasn’t had pied since. You don't have to believe anything, and if using drugs is the way you want to have sex then more power to you.

 

Hmmm. The only two studies we're both from 2015? The only thing the article really proves is that there is very little research/studies on the affects of porn.

Does lack of evidence prove that porn causes ED? Not necessarily. But there does seem to be a lot of anectdotal evidence that shows that men who have used pornography heavily for several years frequently develop ED. And that many cure it by not watching porn.

But we also use to believe that fat in our diet was bad and sugar was completely safe. That idea stuck around for decades b/c food companies published ”research” that proved it and villanized fat to sell fat-free, sugar laden products. You still find foods that list ”fat free” as a feature.

My point is you have to question research and lack thereof. Doesporn cause ED? I think for many, it does. I also think that it will get worse as VR porn and other technological advancements make porn more ”real.”

 

Now this may very well be true. However, I really don’t know anyone who only watches porn and doesn’t engage in masturbation. They edge for hours, they eventually orgasm. Porn is the gasoline on the masturbation fire.

 

Willpower is a finite resource. You have to build good habits like working out, hydrating, eating good food, getting sunlight, fresh air etc. Yes to porn blockers. Minimize screen time. Read books.

 

He uses porn blockers and accountability apps on all his devices. He told his boss at work so that he could block his work phone and iPad. He goes to saa group 3x a week as well as a private small group led by a csat. He goes to counseling. He did emdr to deal with childhood and adult trauma. He did biofeedback to help with adhd rather than use drugs. I’d say good results with the bio but not perfect, he still has some adhd tendencies. The emdr we have seen some results but he isn’t finished. He thinks the group is what has helped him the most. The guys in the small group call each other weekly to hold everyone accountable. He doesn’t ever stay home alone and now won’t travel alone. A really good book for u to read is Treating pornography addiction by dr. Kevin Skinner. It will help u identify triggers ie loneliness, sadness, boredom etc. then u map your inner outer and middle behaviors and u set up a plan to stay clean. It’s never going to happen with will power alone

 

Nothing more than an additional anecdote, I suppose, but in decades of marriage I have never had an ED problem--and never been hooked on porn. I'd have an O an average of about two or three times a week, which seems fairly average and not too excessive.

I tend to agree with those who put the focus on the sexual excess rather than the porn itself. However, anyone watching porn obviously sits in the waterslide that ends up in the pool. I doubt there are many who do not follow through on what they have begun in their imaginations. It seems that people who are weakest in this area have underlying emotional issues, such as depression, loneliness, or lack of self-esteem. Unfortunately, PMO contributes to these issues, becoming a vicious cycle. It's a trap, and once caught, it's a huge struggle to escape. But it is possible, and willpower, plus right methods, are key.

Some here may think it's hard to be addicted to M without P. I was always addicted to the O, not to anything else. Porn has never been an issue with me. Judging by the experiences I've seen posted here by others, it seems that the P accelerates sexual desires, and greatly increases the "need" for instant, and perhaps constant, gratification. (Of course it is not actually needed.) With decisiveness and willpower, the vicious cycle of lust can be broken.

 

I'm single and I find this post very helpful:

https://www.reddit.com/r/NoFap/comments/2sys2c/the_universal_laws_of_nofap/

I think that for me, it comes down to at least these three major motivations:

Morality
Self-respect
Health

Morality: I think watching porn and excessively masturbating is wrong for many reasons. Some would disagree, but I don't care. What is important is that IF I think porn is wrong, and yet I STILL watch it, I am being a hypocrite. What happens to a hypocrite? They lose self-respect.

Self-Respect: If I am a hypocrite and I don't have self-respect, then how can I expect anyone to respect me? I don't mean that I want to be self-aggrandizing, but I don't want to hurt myself. It doesn't matter that I am single. I hate the feeling of relapsing, I hate the feeling of hating myself, of grimacing and clenching my fists because dang it I did it again. Why would I want to do something that makes me feel miserable?! That, to me, has nothing to do with having a girlfriend.

Health: Wanking with a hand every day can't be good for your physical or mental health. 1) It ain't good for the penis. 2) Sex with oneself isn't liberating, it's just a bit of sexual theater, it's a lie that says I can feel true sexual joy on my own.

 

Why are you shilling so hard, Bandido? You have more than one account on this forum too. It's really starting to seem like you've been hired to post here...

 

Porn is much more of a direct cause than many will admit. Compare to other "indirect" causes of harm to see how porn differs.

For example, operating a motor vehicle may result in physical injury or death. The vehicle would be the indirect cause of this. The direct cause might be how the vehicle was operated. And the vehicle was necessary for everyday life. The vehicle serves many useful purposes.

Porn, on the other hand, leads to only one thing--lust and sexual gratification. It is not necessary for life, work, or anything else. As it serves only one purpose, and not a noble one, it is directly culpable for the harm it causes.

An interesting question arises about culpability in a case of "soft porn" that occurs in public places. For those avoiding any and all triggers, please read no further.

Spoiler

In Taiwan, betelnut, tobacco, etc. are often sold by scantily clad young ladies, sometimes called "spice girls," "betelnut babes," etc. DO NOT search for these online--for though they do put themselves on public display, and are not totally naked, yet they are wickedly bold and could easily cause your downfall. They sit in booths by the side of the road, waiting for passing drivers to stop to purchase their products. In the case where one driver ahead may have stopped in the road, and another driver, caught looking at the "babe," rear-ends the car ahead, who should be at fault? Personally, I think the "babes" have a measure of responsibility in this, even though, legally, it's entirely on the driver. The "indirect" cause is really more "direct" than people might think.