Question for the 30+ day NoFappers

I think it's the bible that changes your purpose, nofap is just a means

 

I think its a separate question. PMO addiction is just one of your problem. Solving it doesn't make your life any easier. Take a drug addict for example, after they become sober doesnt mean they become successful all of a sudden.

But semen retention really do wonders in my opinion. U will have more energy like a lot more. What will happen next really depends on how u spend those energy. Are u able to live a healthier lifestyle? Are u willing to learn new skills? Do u have the courage to walk out of your comfort zone facing your fears?

From my other perspective, firstly nofap helps you recover from being a handicap to a normal person and in addition to you living a healthy lifestyle, your "HEALTH" problemS has been solved.
Secondly, after certain streak on nofap you will realise that you have more time and energy. Slowly you will also realise those underlying issues that have been left untreated will resurface and plus the current problems faced at your "age" are unavoidable. If you are able to sort out those problems bit by bit and faced your fears which is difficult because life was meant to be hard, only by then you are truly living your "LIFE".

Im writing this based on my 14 years of addiction and 150days streak. Im happier person now and im still working on solving my life problems which is tough.

It doesnt get easier but you get better.
See u on the other side comrade!

 

Can you explain a bit, about what exactly are the changes you have felt?

 

One day at a time and don't forget to enjoy the process

 

I can think better, no brain fog but still have problem paying attention.
More energy - hands and feet not feeling cold - overall better digestive system - less acne - less mood swing - better sleep quality - less anxiety - much more decisive - deeper voice i think - better reflexes - more self-control - felt more confidence - more positive then negative thoughts - stronger hand grip for sure - better immune system - better memory

I think thats most of it but not all. I mentioned im doing better but not fully recovered. Its like I was only running on 20-30% of my total capacity before but now im running on 50-60%.

I do feel like superman from day 70-100 before my first wet dream. It feels like u can punch through walls. High on adrenaline all the time. Now i feel much more balance i think but urges hit me harder at 140days than at 100days.

Im trying to introduce better habits into my daily life but its not easy. My brain still wants that quick and easy dopamine rush from food and technology (social media,games etc). Well maybe i should be grateful that im doing better now instead of relapsing. Cant just become successful after 150 days of abstaining and not work on other things.

 

How were your first 30 days? I got bombarded with images ( In my head ) from previous porn videos.

Its stucked inside my head and sometime I can't let go for the entire day.

 

Think of the many years you've been doing all this. Compare that to the days of sobriety that went by. You can't expect things to change drastically within your meagre days of sobriety given the years of damage done in the past. Everything comes with time.
That's how I think about this.

 

Agreed, I personally feel better about myself as time goes by. I think the biggest challenge is really relapsing, I have be trying to quit even before discovering NoFap. I have gone some extended periods without porn in the past, maybe as high as six months. But I always get complacent and relapse. The positive is that in the past years I have been more sober than than fapping. So that is good. But I would really like to remove porn from my life for good.

 

I cant remember well. But theres definitely urges from day 1 to day 45.
I can only advice u one thing. Once i stop all sexual fantasy, i broke through all my previous streak and thus the current 150 days.
Then slowly i realized beside sexual fantasies, i do have other activities that i should avoid so that i do not relapse.
But get rid of all sexual fantasy that comes into mind thats the priority! Some might disagree but i cut off any thoughts that is related to woman as early as i could before it starts balling up.
I even avoided tv's till today. No music no nth. Everything is in your brain its in your mind. Whatever we do we must process through our thoughts first before actually doing it.
Slowly read your thoughts and see how it leads and how your brain controls u more than u control your brain.

In my opinion we will achieve victory when we have full control over our brain.

 

My advice is counter-intuitive to people living in 2020. I say go offline. Build hobbies in the real world with real people. Read books, lift weights, do craftwork with your hands, climb a mountain, swim in the ocean, and so on.

PMO requires a very specific situation to occur. To become addicted to PMO, we must recreate those conditions over and over again. To quit PMO, you must disable or not create those conditions.

Alone > no interruptions/visitors > bored > shut the door > lock the door > close the curtains > connect to internet > open private browsing window

To stop PMO, you must stop being alone all of the time, bored and on the internet. So I recommend to build a lifestyle that doesn't revolve around a smartphone or a computer.

This will always improve social anxieties (over time) and improve quality of life generally by avoiding super-stimuli (i.e. digital screens). Replacing super-stimuli with natural, evolutionarily evolved stimuli (i.e. being near rivers, experiencing nature, people, intimacy, etc.) helps heal the brain the fastest.

 

I 100% agree with this post. Good stuff! You need to live, not be stuck in some virtual world.

 

Not much. Nofap really doesn't help you with your clarity and purpose but it makes you feel like less of a loser. That is probably the biggest benefit, you don't feel like you have anything to ba ashamed of or to hide.

Dont know if this is just the way you have worded it but a lot of the most beneficial changes aren't external habits that you do like meditating, lifting, sleeping on a schedule, eating etc. but they are internal habits which are often unconcious and hard to control. Of course you should still do the external things, if you are spending heaps of time inside beating it and you don't have many friends even going to the gym every other day and going for a walk in the sun most days will have a massive benefit for you (not a prescription just an example). But over time you need to realise you likely have unhealthy thought patterns and things like pmo and feeling like a loser is just a symptom of these thought patterns.

Treat the underlying illness ie bad thought habits, bad beliefs, bad attitudes. The first step to this is focusing on the external habits, but eventually you need to examine the internal habits which you can do through reading and concious reflection.

 

I feel a little fraudulent commenting on this as i relapsed the other month after an 80 day streak, which i'd like to say was from complacency but probably was a lot of factors. BUT, i forsureee got some insight into how much better life is without porn and nofap during that period. I was in a reallllly dark existential, self-hatred, place before those 80 days, I felt like a real fucking loser. And when i gave it up, i'd say after a few weeks, I just started waking up completely neutral. like, okay i haven't got my shit together, so i guess i better just crack on with sorting it out. And i couldn't believe how many nights i'd go to bed like, cool you did something, nice job. And it wasn't ecstasy and it wasn't the answer to all my issues, but they just felt so much less overwhelming, and so much more manageable, and more importantly, exciting that i was trying to overcome my issues, and genuine belief it could happen. Even though i know that I'm starting that process again, I still know how much value i got from doing those 80days, and that makes bouncing back feel a lot more urgent and possible.

But i definitely agree with the other posts here. Giving up porn and nofap is one aspect, but alongside that i did a lot of self evaluation, built new hobbies and habits, gave up social media focused on getting back to myself. And all this probably played an equally important factor.

To sum up, my feeling is, there won't be a day where it all just clicks and all my existential and identity issues are resolved because one time i gave up porn and started doing more exercise. Every day there are struggles, but getting rid of doing self-destructive activities helps you face the challenges without them feeling defeating. keep at it my man.

 

I wind up saying this a lot, but NoFap isn't a panacea. Some people struggle with a lot of issues besides PMO, that can't be fixed by quitting PMO. In each case, you will have to resolve the issue some other way.

 

Some very good post here! People often try to make NoFap seem like it gives you super powers. This has not been my experience either. I personally just feel more a like a normal guy when I am not PMOing my life away. Biggest plus for me is a normal return to sexual function and not feeling shitty because I have been binging on porn. When you watch you know you are being shallow and undisciplined. Further more you know you are hurting yourself. So not engaging in PMO makes you feel more like the person you should be and it is great when you realize I do not have to worry about getting an erection. This is how you should be, these are not super powers!