Do you really want to help?

Amaterasus · Sep 15, 2020

So instead of ranting in other people's post's I made my own, becouse i feel like i have to speak my mind. Even if people don't agree.

But yea my point is: do you really want to help others? Becouse making posts like NoFap can be used as a p-sub seems highly unhelpful. I knew the moment i saw that most that my partner would fall into that trap, and he did. And I know that he is not the only one.

It's like I would post all the loopholes I know exist in a2y, or qustudio or whatever software monitoring programs me and my partner have tried. That would only cause harm, an addict deep into hes addiction can't resist. And you people here of all people should know this.

Second of all, why do you post explicit content in your journals? Question asked to the ones that do. Isn't it enough to know that you and your SO had sex and how that affected your relationship and addiction. Where is the need to write out the whole act as a erotic novel? What purpose does that serve, other then dragging people down? And for what, so people might know your good in bed?

And yes I'm angry, becouse i don't think either of these things should be on this forum at all. Not loopholes, especially not with the title being oh this is a loophole! And perhaps even more so the graphic sexual descriptions. This does not belong in a forum for people that want to recover.

Psalm27:1my light · Sep 15, 2020

Amaterasus said: ↑

So instead of ranting in other people's post's I made my own, becouse i feel like i have to speak my mind. Even if people don't agree.

But yea my point is: do you really want to help others? Becouse making posts like NoFap can be used as a p-sub seems highly unhelpful. I knew the moment i saw that most that my partner would fall into that trap, and he did. And I know that he is not the only one.

It's like I would post all the loopholes I know exist in a2y, or qustudio or whatever software monitoring programs me and my partner have tried. That would only cause harm, an addict deep into hes addiction can't resist. And you people here of all people should know this.

Second of all, why do you post explicit content in your journals? Question asked to the ones that do. Isn't it enough to know that you and your SO had sex and how that affected your relationship and addiction. Where is the need to write out the whole act as a erotic novel? What purpose does that serve, other then dragging people down? And for what, so people might know your good in bed?

And yes I'm angry, becouse i don't think either of these things should be on this forum at all. Not loopholes, especially not with the title being oh this is a loophole! And perhaps even more so the graphic sexual descriptions. This does not belong in a forum for people that want to recover.
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I agree with you. I have read some of these guys posts and think, are you kidding? Why would you think it’s a good idea to post such explicit things. Then I remember, addicts have horrible judgment! Lol! That’s part of the reason they are addicts! However, people who really want recovery, will avoid the explicit posts and will guard themselves when exposed to triggering things.

Amaterasus · Sep 16, 2020

Psalm27:1my light said: ↑

I agree with you. I have read some of these guys posts and think, are you kidding? Why would you think it’s a good idea to post such explicit things. Then I remember, addicts have horrible judgment! Lol! That’s part of the reason they are addicts! However, people who really want recovery, will avoid the explicit posts and will guard themselves when exposed to triggering things.
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Thats true, about addicts not having the best judgment on things. And yea being a sex addict I can see the need to be exlicit becouse everything revolves around sex in their mind.

And like i said before i was just angry, I do however think that there should be a policy against posting loopholes so openly at least. For the sake of the forum.

EyesWideOpen · Sep 16, 2020

Amaterasus said: ↑

So instead of ranting in other people's post's I made my own, becouse i feel like i have to speak my mind. Even if people don't agree.

But yea my point is: do you really want to help others? Becouse making posts like NoFap can be used as a p-sub seems highly unhelpful. I knew the moment i saw that most that my partner would fall into that trap, and he did. And I know that he is not the only one.

It's like I would post all the loopholes I know exist in a2y, or qustudio or whatever software monitoring programs me and my partner have tried. That would only cause harm, an addict deep into hes addiction can't resist. And you people here of all people should know this.

Second of all, why do you post explicit content in your journals? Question asked to the ones that do. Isn't it enough to know that you and your SO had sex and how that affected your relationship and addiction. Where is the need to write out the whole act as a erotic novel? What purpose does that serve, other then dragging people down? And for what, so people might know your good in bed?

And yes I'm angry, becouse i don't think either of these things should be on this forum at all. Not loopholes, especially not with the title being oh this is a loophole! And perhaps even more so the graphic sexual descriptions. This does not belong in a forum for people that want to recover.
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If you notice the ones further in their recovery are the ones much less likely to do this. The ones still active in their addiction or very early in their recovery are more inclined to it. Trigger buttons should be being used.

Carpediem77 · Sep 17, 2020

Amaterasus said: ↑

So instead of ranting in other people's post's I made my own, becouse i feel like i have to speak my mind. Even if people don't agree.

But yea my point is: do you really want to help others? Becouse making posts like NoFap can be used as a p-sub seems highly unhelpful. I knew the moment i saw that most that my partner would fall into that trap, and he did. And I know that he is not the only one.

It's like I would post all the loopholes I know exist in a2y, or qustudio or whatever software monitoring programs me and my partner have tried. That would only cause harm, an addict deep into hes addiction can't resist. And you people here of all people should know this.

Second of all, why do you post explicit content in your journals? Question asked to the ones that do. Isn't it enough to know that you and your SO had sex and how that affected your relationship and addiction. Where is the need to write out the whole act as a erotic novel? What purpose does that serve, other then dragging people down? And for what, so people might know your good in bed?

And yes I'm angry, becouse i don't think either of these things should be on this forum at all. Not loopholes, especially not with the title being oh this is a loophole! And perhaps even more so the graphic sexual descriptions. This does not belong in a forum for people that want to recover.
Click to expand...

i fully agree with your point. i was suprised to see what this forum lets people get away with. Just to keep it fair, i have seen/read some women post explicit stuff as well.

irrespective of who posts it , what can we do? if we report it, will it be taken off this forum so that it prevents other from using this as p-sub..

Deleted Account · Sep 19, 2020

I sympathize with you and I think it's very important to highlight this.
Unfortunately NoFap doesn't seem to have many moderators and being a public forum will attract all sorts of people.
Luckily most are considerate and will post with the right motives.

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Do you really want to help?

Amaterasus Fapstronaut

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