The Lord of the Rings Challenge

day 5: almost an Uruk-Hai!

 

Day 3

 

1 Day down! Something to remember: "Porn is porn, no matter what form!"(came up with that yesterday after my relapse to asmr audio porn). Let's do this!

 

Day 4

As I mentioned in my journal, I also wanted to share with you all.

So big day last night. My wife found out that I was on nofap and my history of PMO has been revealed. Although I was upset and angry, it was going to happen sooner or later. It was probably good that it happened this way. We both agreed that I need counseling and my image to her is shattered. I'm hoping she will forgive me one day and understand the struggle I go through. She says she understands that this is an addiction, but I don't think she understands it quite yet. I know I'm in the wrong and objectifying women. At least this is a step in the right direction and my issue will improve from here on out. It is better that this is out than in.

 

This is absolutely a step in the right direction. I bet the fact that you no longer have to keep NoFap and your history of PMO a secret will feel like huge relief. I hope and believe your wife will understand it sooner or later. You are trying your best to overcome this addiction and not only you, but also your wife should be proud of that. Keep it up man!

 

Day 2!

 

Day 6! Uruk-Hai

 

Day 470!!!
Well well...
One month till the end. Starting countdown

 

Congratulations, friend! It is great what you have achieved you are very close to throwing that damn ring into the fire, I respect you!

 

I relapsed today unfornately brothers and sisters. I had a urge and it all started when I was reading a newspaper and it appeared some models and one thing take to another.

But I feel stronger and stronger and the urges are even more weaker and I know that NoFap is a lifestyle, a journey. I'm learning and adapting even more.
NoFap It's not about counting the days that abstain from PMO, it's about changing your lifestyle, your habits and your mentality.
Meditation helps a lot in this way.
The Key is focus on important things in your life, family, work, meditation, reading, workout, etc. and with this, build a new lifestyle.

Good luck with everyone and remember "Rome wasn't built in one day".

Day 0 Check in!
Let's go!

 

Day 31.

 

Ahhh... I really fucked up again. Crashed and burned today, really beating myself up for it this time especially because tomorrow is an important day for me. I ignored the early warning signs of relapse and put off dealing with them until later, in the interim I saw a trigger and because I was already weak that was all it took. Fuck.

 

You're right! I guess it's stupid to treat this like a sprint instead of a marathon. I'll keep working on things and come out the other side some day.

 

Relapsed twice last night. I was drinking with my roommates beforehand and brought another beer into my room to drink by myself before going to bed (not a good combo). Made the mistake of keeping my phone with me and that led to full relapses. I've made a new rule to not drink solo under any circumstance.

I think my brain wanted a dopamine hit to deal with the possibility of losing my job and the stress from all that's going on with the world. I'm not as depressed about the relapses as I thought I would be. I'm picking myself up by going for a hike this weekend and cooking some healthy food.

Here's some vulgar encouragement from comedian Bill Burr that helps me keep trying:

 

My brother, everyone in here that keeps fighting and don't retreat even if he falls, worthy a lot and has my respect also... Like you. Keep fighting and one day you will make bigger strike than mine. Believe me. Believe it.

 

Day 8.

 

Day 8.

 

Relapsed, but feeling good.